Fat girl summer - let's slay 💅

[Lwrenn]

So, for those of us who are chunky yet funky, what's the plan ladies?

Shall we give no fucks and wear nice comfy summery clothes or do we worry about keeping every inch of us covered head to toe in black until we sweat so hard we melt? What's the plan?

Currently a size 20/22 myself, unlikely to get down to a magical size 14 by July so I'm looking at the nice comfy looking linen pants, few maxi dresses, shorts because I'm a wee chubby pale rebel and to really go wild a jumpsuit or two.

Simply be has some lovely things at the moment including shoes, asos curve is looking alright and vinted is my best pal.

I'm 35 for a few more months and don't want to have another summer in my 30s hating my body, so this year I'm going to embrace it. Anyone with me?

Seconding Primal Donna. They're amazing.

I'm looking at swimwear from Miss Mary of Sweden at the moment

I'm really enjoying this thread - thank you for starting it.

I've started buying a few new things as the styles in the shops now are similar to when I was in my 'prime' (ie slim) but there's no reason I can't enjoy what's about now but in a bigger size is there?

Or is that a big mistake?

Obviously I'm not thinking of buying crop tops and parachute trousers but I've bought a denim skirt similar to my old favourite one and I'm unsure whether to go with the size that fits or to size up so that my menopausal belly isn't so obvious. Or return them both.

Help!!

I go with what feels good and gives me a bit of room to grow or shrink a bit as my weight fluctuates a lot and I can't bear the feeling of something being too tight, especially in the waist area.

What do you feel good in? Is there a difference in how they look?

The smaller one fits my waist with a bit of room to spare but is snug across the hips and my belly just sticks out @TruthThatsHardAsSteel. The larger one is too big around the waist, roomier on the hips and kind of hangs off my belly.

When I tried the original one on (smaller) at first, I felt great but add in a bit of bloat and I'm not so sure. I've had to wait for the larger one to come back into stock and I thought it would be great. But I don't think it is.

Ooo thanks will check her out 💛

Def keep the one that fits on the waist - all you can see is it showing your menopausal belly, but others will perceive it as emphasising your waist. See all the waists on show in lots of the photos on this thread!

You felt great at first in the smaller one - do you experience bloating every day, or will you have plenty of days when you could wear it with no issues? If the snugness on the hips means you can’t comfortably sit down or move around, that would be the only thing that would put me off. Otherwise, keep, and wear with pride!

@poppym12 I think if you want to wear it you shouldn’t worry about the belly, everyone has one, there’s nothing offensive there! But personally that’s the bit of me I struggle with, so if I were in your position I’d probably go for something with a more forgiving cut, while cheering on those who are confident in their bellies!

Thank you @mixedpeel. I did feel good until I saw my profile. I'm struggling with that more than the rest of the weight gain as I always had a very flat stomach, even after having a huge baby it shrunk right back to usual size. Menopause can be bloody cruel.

I've ordered a different style too so I'll see if I feel better in that one when it arrives @GoingDownDown. I can sit comfortably in it and maybe denim will stretch a bit after wearing....I can but hope!

I do know what you mean about some styles showing the sticky-out belly more than others. I tried on a gorgeous skirt in a charity shop at the weekend, loved the fabric and length on me, but it did show my meno-pot. However, with this thread in mind, I bought it, and have already worn it with a short loose t shirt that skims over it. Next job is to follow my own advice and wear it with a top that doesn’t disguise the belly!

I might try it again tomorrow with different styles of top/t-shirt - great idea @mimixedpeel, thank you. Glad to hear you've worn your new skirt already.

Lovely seeing everyone's pictures on here .

About sizing - I tend to size up as like you @poppym12 , I have menopausal belly and I can't bear anything tight . I also only buy clothes that skim or are stretchy fabric . It's more about comfort than looks though .

I have to say a thank you again for this thread! Tried on some shorts in h and m yesterday - and I think for the first time ever I sized up and felt ok about it. I liked the way looked, knew they would be good for holiday but knew they didn't have too much give round all the bits of me that would need it - so deliberately picked up a realistic size.

The positivity and acceptance on here is fab! Before I would probably have tried the size I normally wear, it would have been too small and so I would have left the shorts. Also, I would not have even looked in h and m as I would have felt too old

I went to a music festival at the weekend too - I like the freedom to go a bit more wild with what I wear.

I didn't get any photos of my outfits and often they were covered by my Dryrobe (the new British summer essential) but I wore:

• Jeans, boots, Manners vest top and this is Unfolded oversized blue/white striped shirt, red/white/black bandana;
• long gold sequin skirt (self made) and my very loud sparkly tiger with jewels tshirt;
• Manners pink/red Asri dress with a red cardy.

all with Blundstone boots. I took sandals but no chance to wear those.

Hope you had a great festival @Evenstar and rocked all your outfits.

I am going to WIlderness festival in August and they have "daily dress code" which is lots of fun. Themes are Once Upon A time in the Woods, Celestial Bodies and It's Frilling. I'm working with what I've already got but will need to make something for day 3 in oversized ruffles/frills. I have several meters of red chiffon that I am looking to use to make a big frilly flouncy skirt. I have some starry fairy lights I will make a headpiece with for day 2. Along with friendship bracelets for Taylor Swift later in August there is lots to make. I better get busy.

@RobinEllacotStrike I was packing early! Off to the Isle of Wight tomorrow, they have a Midsummer theme and fairy themed fancy dress competition. Will add photos of outfits when I can.

Well done you for going for it!

have a great time!! The weather is looking much better for you so you can get out there and enjoy your finery!

Hello, again - just wondering if I could have advice on really good shapewear? I’m going to a wedding soon and have a fabulous dress from Phase 8 (half price in the sale!) but would like some shapewear that’s effective but comfy. I’m not trying to look thin as that’d be impossible but something to just bring my big tummy in a bit would be perfect. And long leg line to prevent chubrub if possible. Would be very grateful to hear your recommendations.

Ooh a bargain, my thrifty wee heart is thrilled for you!

Now I've not tried them but I've heard absolutely rave reviews from friends about their skims shape wear, apparently it is worth the hype.
I'm very much set in my ways and tend to just use m&s shapewear because it was all available to us really back in the day and I'm a creature of habit 😂
If you can't find anything decent how about one of those bodysuit types that have straps and stops just under the bra and teaming that with some chub rub shorts, they're pretty seamless nowadays!

I have a wedding to go to on Saturday and I've bought an M&S wear your own bra bodysuit. I wore it to test it yesterday and it was actually pretty comfy. I added a pair of chub rub shorts, also M&S, and will wear the same combo on Saturday. I was expecting the bodysuit to not do very much but it does smooth out my belly and back fat nicely. I'm still fat, but not lumpy and fat!

@RobinEllacotStrike I am loving the sound of a sparkly bejewelled tiger top! You have reminded me I need to start thinking about fancy dress for Shambala! The theme is “wild and free” and I have to sort something for me and for the kids. So far I have a six year old who wants to be a pikachu…

Re the skims shape wear. It is definitely pricey. But I got a pair of cycling shorts type thing from Vinted (new)
They were a fraction of the price. True to size and so bloody comfy ☺️
Get yourselves on vinted girls x

Thank you so much for the shapewear recommendations. I have to take my teen shopping for her dress this weekend so I’ll make her come with me to M&S to check out the undies. She’ll love it! 😆😆😆 Will also search Vinted for Skims.

Wow, there’s a lot of perky oiled bosoms on the Skims home page. I wish! 😁

Ughhh I need some support ladies.

Why does this happen to me every time I travel abroad??

I feel okay about my appearance (not great but okay). However whenever I travel to Europe (France, Germany, etc) I feel utterly HIDEOUS. I feel I look like an elephant next to the European women with their natural tans and teeny tiny waists. I find myself body checking every minute and feel so self conscious, to the point where comparisons become obsessive & compulsive. I felt hyper aware of my body and shameful of it. I even started to feel guilty that my husband is married to me and not women like them.

When I arrived back in the UK, within a few hours I felt okay again, borderline pretty.

How can I stop this cycle keep happening whenever I travel? It spoils what should be a really pleasant experience.

Sorry for dampening the thread.