What to wear to an event with family drama likely?

[KatPurrson]

So this is a bit of an odd one. I have to go to a family will reading. I have no idea what to wear as I’ve never had to do this kind of thing before. It’s a solicitors office and it’s followed by a tea (as there wasn’t a funeral for various reasons).

I suppose the thing is partly the occasion and partly about who else will be there.

There are some older fairly judgemental family going to be there, who disapprove of my life choices. I think my main thing really is being able to feel confident whilst also feeling like myself. Wouldn’t rule out the possibility of high drama given some of the personalities involved. So I am looking for something between armpit and a safety blanket.

I am late forties, size 16 bust, size 14 hips. Long dark hair and suit warm, bright colours or black and white at a push. Knee length or long skirts/dresses, midi looks awful on me and not a big fan of trousers.

My best thought so far is something like a bias cut dress with a nice cropped cardigan but I have no idea really.

And thank you. You have made me cry. Which is probably what I needed.

I really have to delight in the drama because the other choice is to despair at the tragedy.

Ok I’m out.

This is bollox

@fernsandlilies that is beautiful

Wish that it were.

Are you Mary from Coronation Street???

You’re upset. Yet revelling in this , posturing and showing off

excessive detail. Orchids. Crap.

put a black dress on fgs

@Weenurse This one is nice https://www.roman.co.uk/floral-print-tie-waist-maxi-dress-14090264

I have these sandals already, which I think might go better than birkenstocks
https://www.aspiga.com/products/naisha-soft-sole-sandals-pink-orange

This is a Style and Beauty thread. Style as armour, and a comfort and an assertion of self against people who have been awful.

No need for black dresses. People don’t become decent people just because they have died.

Armour

🙄🙄

That’s pretty much what my mum would have worn in similar circumstances to be fair.

I’d probably like to dress a little bit more like myself. I’ve had a lifetime of trying to fit in to gain their approval and have realised it doesn’t matter what I do, I’d as well be myself really.

Thank you so much.

I’m not quite sure what to make of your thread, but the links are good! My two penneth would be:

If there was ever a moment to channel the fifties, this would be it. A full skirt and neat jacket will see you right.

Steer well clear of slip dresses for this occasion and any other occasion. To me they always give off a ‘not quite fully dressed’ vibe.

Something about lemons and lemonade.

I’m very happy for you that your life has never necessitated that. Others vary.

That is good advice. I think I am drawn o slip dresses because they are bias cut and bias cut does suit me. I might need to find a bias cut dress more structure at the neck. Maybe 3/4 sleeves with lots of little fabric covered buttons and rouleau loops.

Psychic armour. Stab proof vest. Shoes you can walk away fast in.

All black (might sound a bit odd when you've said you like bright colours but it's the best colour for hiding what you're truly feeling. I say that as someone who loves bright colours but has spent the last two years in black due to poisonous workmates).

Or you could opt for the prettiest, most flowery, most demure outfit you can think of to knock your judgemental relatives off balance and play along with how you think their wisdom is just what you need and you're honoured to merely be in their presence.

Family deaths bring out the best and worst in people and it isn't always grief. It's often just greed.

Do you even have to attend?

https://www.dollyanddotty.co.uk/products/claudia-flirty-fifties-swing-orchid-dress-in-white-pink

You can’t go wrong with an Orchid…..

not sure if this is sombre enough but from the sounds of it you could run in the heals( about third picture on)

oh and stick a big parasol in your lemonade xx

Thank you.

Thank you.

TheExclusiveSandwich sounds like she might be one of the other guests at the reading.

Think of the outfit most likely to cause intense and lasting rage in the gathered throng. Wear that.

If it was winter I would think about it. Well, more a long coat with a flowing skirt and hood than a cape. I used to have one when I lived in Glasgow because the rain was awful.

I don’t watch Coronation Street sorry.

Suit of armour 🤣

Actually will readings are not unheard of even now for larger estates with many beneficiaries or in certain social circles.
As for the comments that this is an inappropriate concern because someone has died, death isn't always a tragedy: to the religious or pragmatic, it's often just a part of life and not always a negative thing, especially at the end of a long well lived life. And the poster sounds sad and vulnerable to me - just another human being trying to get on as best she can.
As for clothing, I thought the ghost dress looked beautiful. You mentioned jigsaw I think outfits you formerly owned and loved - try a vintage site to replace the same perhaps? Alternatively black and white together are both striking and won't scare the horses. If the black is on your bottom half, then black or smart tan knee length boots might be a way of solving the footwear problem if you don't want to go the kitten heel route. I'd avoid open toe shoes. Don't forget some perfume that makes you feel fabulous.

I am being strongly reminded of a character in an India Knight or Jilly Cooper novel (the later JC ouevre). So, instead of What would you wear if someone invited you to Traviata at Covent Garden? perhaps you could think what you'd wear to sing Tosca (a la Hermione, if that means anything to you).

Or, as you mentioned Dynasty, maybe try channeling Joan Collins walking into the courtroom. Definitely wear a veil in this case.

But we do like the silliness
Love a Friends quote