Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Style and beauty

Looking for style advice? Chat all about it here. For the latest discounts on fashion and beauty, sign up for Mumsnet Moneysaver emails.

Original poster

Help Please: White dress for a funeral

134 replies

Eastie77Returns · 09/09/2023 17:30

I'm losing my mind. I need to find a white dress for a funeral (late relative's request, all immediate family must wear this colour) and I've been looking for days.

Most of what I've found so far is too short, partywear or out of budget. As this is something I'm unlikely to wear again - white dresses do not really suit me - I do not want to pay more than £100. The only appropriate stuff I've found so far has been the likes of All Saints or Karen Millen which are far above the budget.

At this point the only dress I've found that I like is this. Be honest, does this look appropriate as I sent it to a relative and she bluntly said I look like I'm going to get married:-
https://www.debenhams.com/product/coast-rose-stretch-lace-v-neck-midi-dress_bcc05561

Alternatively, really like this but worried what 'Pearl' looks like in real life. Is that an off white?
https://www.johnlewis.com/jolie-moi-rashelle-jersey-maxi-dress/pearl/p110318308?deepLink=false

OP posts:
Thread gallery
18
millymae · 09/09/2023 19:30

Minipie suggested the one I’d go for - just needs a cardi or jacket over it and it would do the job nicely. There is also a white French Connection tie waist shirt style dress on the M&S web site that might be suitable if it’s more your style.

Original poster
Eastie77Returns · 09/09/2023 20:43

Malificent1 · 09/09/2023 19:14

Thank you...after going through all the links in the thread I've ordered this as back up in case the Vinted dress doesn't work out. Ticks all the boxes in terms of 'modesty'. Bought via Quidco so getting a bit of money back as well.

PLT describe it as "giving all the bride-to-be wedding vibes." I'm not married yet so could potentially wear the same dress to a funeral and my wedding lol.

Guys...I think I might be sorted. Two dresses sourced, the pillarbox hat from Ebay. I still need shoes but I'm going to buy a cheap pair from somewhere. The power of MN is real!

OP posts:
storypushers · 09/09/2023 20:46

Igneococcus · 09/09/2023 17:48

I quite like this one from Nobody's Child and it's on sale
White Alexa Broderie Midi Dress | Nobody's Child (nobodyschild.com)

That's lovely. Especially if you're slim

Winter42 · 09/09/2023 20:57

If you bought something that you liked the style of you could always dye it after so you would get more wear out of it.

Dylon pods are pretty easy to use.

Original poster
Eastie77Returns · 09/09/2023 21:01

Flyinggeesei234 · 09/09/2023 20:54

This is all kinds of unsuitable!

Show quote history

😂

OP posts:
WellPlaced · 09/09/2023 21:01

Sorry OOS and short sleeved

ElizabethVonArnim · 09/09/2023 21:07

What size are you? If you are a size 14 I have a white dress from The White Company that I will gladly send you - I've decided against it but left it too long to return it. It's similar to this one but in white. You'd be welcome to it if you would like it.

www.thewhitecompany.com/uk/Shirred-Waist-V-Neck-Dress/p/A04866?swatch=Navy

Islandermummy · 09/09/2023 21:17

Sorry for your loss. A pillbox hat works well for a church funeral: smart and not celebratory and doesn't stray into fascinator territory.

Ebay or Etsy can be a good place to start

Islandermummy · 09/09/2023 21:17

Oh just seen you already found a pillbox!

Redlarge · 09/09/2023 21:20

ElizabethVonArnim · 09/09/2023 21:07

What size are you? If you are a size 14 I have a white dress from The White Company that I will gladly send you - I've decided against it but left it too long to return it. It's similar to this one but in white. You'd be welcome to it if you would like it.

www.thewhitecompany.com/uk/Shirred-Waist-V-Neck-Dress/p/A04866?swatch=Navy

Omg this is so kind xxx

gogomoto · 09/09/2023 22:11

They had a lovely white dress in Sainsbury's last week, or try charity shops maybe?

Seems a strange thing to say no trousers, I usually wear trousers to church? Also I've never heard of having to wear a hat

givemeasunnyday · 10/09/2023 01:35

CornishTiger · 09/09/2023 17:45

Why are the family going along with this? That’s a difficult request to fulfil!

I agree. Many people won't have a white dress or trousers/skirt. I don't, and certainly wouldn't be buying anything to wear once to a funeral. Surely a white top with another colour bottom would suffice?

I've never heard of anyone requesting a colour at a funeral, other that occasionally the request to wear bright colours. I'm not in the UK, but people don't tend to wear black here either.

EconomyClassRockstar · 10/09/2023 01:36

Search "Is this dress appropriate for a wedding" and you'll find 10 billion of them! Joking apart, I'm sorry for you loss.

sashh · 10/09/2023 06:18

I think you will have more success with a skirt and top.

try these.

Does it have to be a hat? could you wear a scarf.

The traditional funeral clothing is black, which I would suggest is easier to source at any time of the year..

It depends on your religion and culture, Indian funerals people often wear white, sometimes you get an array of colours, sometimes people wear football shirts at the request of the deceased or thie family.

And hats are not an uncommon request.

OP try looking for an 'abaya' it's a muslim dress, very plain and with long sleeves, you can add a belt or take it up but they are quite versatile.

Abaya

Before you continue to Google Search

https://www.google.com/search?q=modest+white+dress+skirt&sca_esv=564093209&rlz=1C1GCEB_enGB930GB930&hl=en&tbs=vw:g&tbm=shop&ei=uU39ZLX3OP-ehbIPhtyJiAQ&start=60&sa=N&ved=0ahUKEwj1t4naoZ-BAxV_T0EAHQZuAkEQ8NMDCNQX&biw=1366&bih=651&dpr=1

dottiedodah · 10/09/2023 09:09

Maybe The White Company? Or E bay.Also Next have a fairly good one for £76.00 all sizes (Sorry cant link)It was a fairly popular dress choice this summer.(Remember Holly Willoughby white high collar dress).Maybe worth a hunt in local charity shops too(esp in wealthy areas)

Mumsmet · 10/09/2023 10:25

The Jolie Moi one is okay. Not the Coast one. It does look like a Wedding dress

JudgeRudy · 10/09/2023 11:44

Does it have to be a dress? Maybe you would have more luck with a skirt and top combo...or my favourite, some classic wide leg trousers, something you might wear again.

Original poster
Eastie77Returns · 10/09/2023 12:34

ElizabethVonArnim · 09/09/2023 21:07

What size are you? If you are a size 14 I have a white dress from The White Company that I will gladly send you - I've decided against it but left it too long to return it. It's similar to this one but in white. You'd be welcome to it if you would like it.

www.thewhitecompany.com/uk/Shirred-Waist-V-Neck-Dress/p/A04866?swatch=Navy

Thank you, so kind. I'm mostly a size 12 and have now bought a couple of the items suggested in the thread. I love The White Company!

OP posts:
Original poster
Eastie77Returns · 10/09/2023 12:43

givemeasunnyday · 10/09/2023 01:35

I agree. Many people won't have a white dress or trousers/skirt. I don't, and certainly wouldn't be buying anything to wear once to a funeral. Surely a white top with another colour bottom would suffice?

I've never heard of anyone requesting a colour at a funeral, other that occasionally the request to wear bright colours. I'm not in the UK, but people don't tend to wear black here either.

Show quote history

I've only ever bought white linen trousers to go on holiday. Agree that it's really impractical. It will be a nightmare trying to keep DS' all white suit clean on the day. I've bought most of the items from Vinted now, DD's dress was £5 and mine was about £8 new with tags so I can always resell/give to charity.

All white at funerals isn't that unusual in the deceased person's religion. As I'm part of the immedidate family and will be in the front row I won't get away with another colour bottom. Everyone will make a huge fuss. Obviously the deceased will not know either way but there you go.

OP posts: