My DH suggesting I'm "getting old" because I've ordered from Seasalt

[WoofWoofBeachLife]

I saw a lovely wee dress last night on Seasalt, I have some money saved for a clothes makeover and decided to go for it. My DH said last night it was nice but isn't Seasalt for older women 😆 I'm 51 in July and I don't think it looks like an OAP website. Now I'm thinking, shit should I send it back?
I just want a few quality pieces I can add to, I've not bought myself anything in a long long time due to illness. We are going shopping to a shopping centre on Sunday and I'm reluctant to browse with him hovering now x

Your boobs aren't too big, you just need to size up.
Criticise the garment before the body.
That top is anything but "old" and "frumpy". I think it's nice.

This is what I struggle with, who am I now? I lost myself in my first marriage and now I'm free to do what I want and be who I want, I'm floating about like a wee fart at times 😂
I gave up a 20 year career in finance in 2018 due to illness, then divorced in 2019 and moving home 5 times in a year took its toll. A year ago I was taken ill again and I've had a year rehabilitating.
My wardrobe is a mix of office suits, heels (I can't wear) dog walking clothes and I have literally no casual or nice clothes I can go for a coffee in, or just anywhere casual really.
My DH says he sees me as bohemian haha and I do tend to lean towards barefoot and wild hair and floaty. I also love nice cut jeans, a plain tee/shirt or jumper with Dr Martens or Dublin shoes, converse or sandals.
I agree I blame the body and will walk away from a garment without taking the time to see how it could work if I particularly like it.
@Hal9001 thank you that was a lovely post to wake up too. I'm a definite people pleaser. I was a ball buster at work and a narcissists wife at home 😆 so it's been a long time since I was me, I met him at 24.
@Maireas I agree it was nice, I think I'm scared of spending money and buying the wrong things.

Stop blaming your body. It's the clothes, not you.
You've just got to try things out. You sound like you want to go down the bohemian route?
Ok. Take all the business suits and heels to the charity shop.
Get thee to the shops and do a big try on, even out of your comfort zone. Think about what colour and silhouette you like. Loose trousers? Shirts? Kimono tops? Maxis? Then buy a couple of pieces and wear them and see if that's you.
You've just got to find your groove, as they say!

But wait - you divorced in 2019, @WoofWoofBeachLife ?

And yet - between lockdowns and illness and house moves and dogs - you have acquired another husband within those four years?

You must be enviably attractive, as well as witty.

Am very …

Also, you weren't a "ball buster" at work. You were probably just a competent, efficient professional. Women always get labelled.

I’m mid 40s and dint wear white stuff, joules or sea salt.
I dint think they’re awful but they are very popular with the pta school mums here 🤣. They probably think how I dress is awful though!

i bought a couple of t shirts from Joules once, and had to put them in the charity bag because they both shrunk, quality was terrible.

My advice is to head to a good sized charity shop and try on different brands, you might be surprised! Forget the label, does it suit you. On weekends I mostly wear jeans and tops, of the ones i bought new (I do one day a week in a charity shop!) most is actually sainsburys because it's near my house, they have nice clothes. I have lots of different brands bought from the charity shop too, some are unusual, overseas or expensive brands all bought for a few pounds.

Better head to a proper, big, department store to try on different brands, or go to a good local boutique.

Garments in charity shops are rejects, and maybe that is because they were odd fits for that brand. Or maybe they are very old, and the brand may have changed its designers since. One sometimes gets genuine bargains in charity shops but mostly you don't, really.

My shrunken Joules tops ended up in charity shops, probably better than new as at least they are preshrunk now for the next owner

I paid for a style analysis a few years back. It helped me define my shape and what colour season am I, plus personality style. Some people are boho,others rock chic,and others are classic/French etc. it gave me the confidence to realise I’m never going to carry off elegant and chic well, as i veer towards the boho or Breton top look. I much better at choosing clothes that suit me now, with one of my most complemented dresses being from Sainsbury (anyone remember the marmite dress from last year?).

This thread demonstrates clearly how some people have one mindset when it comes to clothes, and they don’t appreciate that other people have other tastes. Seasalt (Fatface, white stuff et al) may not be right for them, but it doesn’t mean it’s not right for others.

Incidently, I’m not a supermodel, but a 14 stone, fifty something person, currently wearing a crochet top over a strapless vest. Is that something the fashionistas permit me to wear?

Sorry, strappy vest.

😂😂 I do cause a lot of my own stress!
I met my DH in 2018, we walked our dogs in the same area. My marriage was over anyway but I still stupidly sold the house and bought a cottage with him, I can't explain it myself. I lasted 5 months and moved into my Sisters for a few weeks and then to a wee flat on my own with 2 dogs 2 cats and I was travelling back and forth looking after my bloody chickens because he wouldn't. Moved again to another lovely wee flat more suitable for the dogs and then to my current little bungalow lol. I'm puffed out thinking about it. Don't be envious it was the worst stress in my life apart from when my DS died.
I can't tag everyone but thank you. I also like Sainsburys clothes and have always found something in there. Tesco too. I will take that advice to try a store or somewhere with a few selection of what I lean towards. I'd like my shape and colours done, I tried an app and I was a soft summer it said, one said classic summer ☀️
I'm also 14st and would love to lose at least a wee half stone, I don't mind being curvier but when I tip over a certain weight I turn into a flump.
I've never been an effortless dresser but one who gets harassed and sweaty trying things on 😂
I like jumpsuits, random end to the post x

Jeez oh I'm really outing myself on this post 😳😳😳😂😂

I love the backstory

you’re brave and strong and awesome and I am sure you look nice in Seasalt

my DH thinks my Seasalt dresses are sexy 😁 He does not know the brand, he just thinks they are floral and feminine and cute …

opinions may vary 😉

@WoofWoofBeachLife I'm a bit like that too- I don't mind being ample/curvy to some extent apart from health - but I'm only 5ft 4 and there's a big difference between being 12 and a half stone (I look overweight at that but not too bad) and 16stone- (in my case) I'm now back to 14stone 4 and on a downward trend.

I'm going to derail the thread and ask you all who does good cycle shorts? Not thw shiny sporty ones, more legging material as in cotton with stretch. Also any bodysuit recommendations? ❤️

Loving you @WoofWoofBeachLife!

Tell me about your DS.

Aw thank you, my DH like little dresses too 💓 I'm starting the clear out this morning. I'm going to put some bits on Vinted. I've never used it before. Browsed it, never bought or sold. One of my friends is addicted to it, buying and selling.
@Hal9001 my DS was stunningly beautiful, clever, vivacious, so kind and wonderfully witty. She was my best friend and I miss her every single day, the little silly messages and quick calls saying just a few words and a giggle.

@WoofWoofBeachLife I'm one of five, in the middle. Two older sisters, I speak to them all the time. I would miss them so much if they weren't here. They are my go-to people. I just love them. I'm so sorry that your sister has gone. It's rubbish.