What if your aesthetic taste doesn’t match your body?!

[HedgeSparrow]

Inspired by some recent threads on here, I thought I’d reach out and see if anyone shares my perpetual fashion dilemma - one which has been responsible for far too many impulse purchases and unhappy outfits over the years.

What do you do if what you like fashion wise doesn’t really suit you? I love the French-girl classics with a twist kind of style, neat and gamine. Tailoring, neutrals, based around jeans, trousers and knitwear.

However, I’m a large armed, ruddy complexioned Anglo-Saxon, large size 12 with a large bust, hourglass figure, tummy and chunky thighs. All my family look like we’ve just jumped off a Viking longboat but NOT in a Scandi-chic way.

So really my body suits skirts and dresses and I feel more comfortable in them. My body calls for Seasalt tunics. The upshot is I’m either comfortable but feel I don’t look good, or I’m wearing clothes I really like but I’m uncomfortable (and disappointed when I catch a glimpse of myself in them as I just don’t have the right vibe).

Can anyone else relate? How do you square the circle?

I think we all suffer from this. You choose between being personally expressive and statementy and fulfilled, and having.... Pulling power, for want of a better word.

@Glowtastic I'm this shape at 5ft3, I could never wear a dress with a zip as you say it wouldn't do up. I'm a size 10 hips with a size 12 top, shirts are a problem too, summer dresses are OK if just strappy, the only style of dress I can wear with sleeves is a stretch style.

Yes this. All of this

don't get me started in wide leg crops, I have ruined 3 pairs of jeans, trying to get the length just right, but they end up making my legs look 2ft long

@SirChenjins

Are you really going to dress like Suzie Myerson?!

Weirdly, yes! In the latest season, she has a lovely tweedy jacket and waistcoat combo. I'm very similarly shaped so better versions of her style might be a starting point.

@gingerhills

I think every woman in the world looks good in well fitting dark jeans or well cut trousers, a tailored white cotton of linen blouse and a tailored navy blazer. That classic French chic look works because it it is clean and crisp. It is especially attractive on gamine women but lots of well built women carry it off too. The blonde woman below mixes up the Seasalt tunic with classic blazer. Would that be a good compromise?

Nope. I look like I belong in a Thelwell cartoon.

@Floisme

I'm fast losing patience with all these rules about what does and doesn't suit you. I'm sure they were only ever intended to be a useful guide, not a straight jacket. And I really hate the way they encourage us all to be hyper self critical. If I like it, I wear it.

For me it’s not to do with rules, it’s to do with looking in a mirror and settingw I look dreadful.

Oh I hear you!!! I want to be gamine and androgenous and a bit rock chick.

Instead I'm curvy with big boobs and a very girly, big eyed, feminine face. I suit pretty dresses and Mad-Men style tight sweaters and pencil skirts with heels. I hate heels! I want to wear biker boots!

I think we all suffer from this. You choose between being personally expressive and statementy and fulfilled, and having.... Pulling power, for want of a better word.

Don't go on the "high heels" thread that's on this board atm for gods sake! You'll get slaughtered for saying you dress to have pulling power - apparently if you want to wear high heels you are anti feminist and need your head examining! A woman on there is being told she should wear a floor length, slit up the side evening gown to a black tie event with flat sandals!

@raspberrymuffin

Re jumpsuits, I am tall and (ahem) sturdy like my farm labourer foremothers and have found that a black linen cropped wide-leg jumpsuit with a belt looks amazing on me. I realise this is an extremely specific set of criteria but honestly I've never felt so glamorous wearing anything else in my entire life so if you are built like me I highly recommend giving it a go.

Ooo can you suggest some for another sturdy woman over here?

[quote londonmummy1966]@nokaa I looked at your survey and I have to say I find it really depressing. If you've read this thread you will realise that a lot of women are struggling to find clothes that suit their (female) body shapes. Your sponsor COS is one of the prime offenders in serving up racks and racks of clothes that only suit one very particular body shape that is almost impossible to find amongst women who have had children as it most closely resembles that of a teenager or prepubescent girl (or a boy.....). I would say that the majority of COS designers are completely unaware of the fact that real women have a bust (let alone a stomach or chunky legs).

It is a real pity that in the race to be the most virtue signalling - sustainable/trans inclusive etc etc you have forgotten that real women are the market. I'm picking COS out here as they are your sponsor but, if you have read this thread at all, you will realise that so many women finding it so hard to find clothes that work for their bodies means that many other brands are missing this too. If COS could produce sustainable clothing that actually suited women it would be on to a commercial winner......[/quote]
only suit one very particular body shape that is almost impossible to find amongst women who have had children as it most closely resembles that of a teenager or prepubescent girl (or a boy.....). I would say that the majority of COS designers are completely unaware of the fact that real women have a bust (let alone a stomach or chunky legs).

Completely agree. Apparently a lot of these retailers don't want my £££ due to the fact I have massive norks.

@gingerhills I'd look like Jeremy Clarkson in that.

@gingerhills

I think every woman in the world looks good in well fitting dark jeans or well cut trousers, a tailored white cotton of linen blouse and a tailored navy blazer. That classic French chic look works because it it is clean and crisp. It is especially attractive on gamine women but lots of well built women carry it off too. The blonde woman below mixes up the Seasalt tunic with classic blazer. Would that be a good compromise?

No way, blazers look dreadful on me.

Which I’m cool with as I had enough navy blazer at school.

Love this thread.
I’m flat chested and would never be able to pull off a dress or a t-shirt or anything that looks good with boobs.

I think we all suffer from this. You choose between being personally expressive and statementy and fulfilled, and having.... Pulling power, for want of a better word.

The two aren’t necessarily mutually exclusive.

I recently tried to dress a bit better based on the style and beauty advice but it didn't really work out.

I tried slightly folding my jeans so they just reached my chunky boots but as I am also quite chunky and short there was something just wrong with my proportions.

I also tried a multitude of black chunky ankle boots but as I'm short with big feet they all looked like wellies.

II did get a shock at the weekend in a brutal double mirror in a train toilet. My hair is so much wispier and sadder looking than I thought and my middle area is even chunkier than my too tight jeans had alerted me to.

I've decided it was just unfortunate lighting and will never look at the back of my head again!

Yes I do look good in blazers but structured shirts look awful on me, as does anything white. Plus I WFH and have a sticky-fingered toddler, there’s nowhere I go that would warrant those kind of clothes. All my office clothes have been relegated to the loft now.

@Allthesefolks

Yes I do look good in blazers but structured shirts look awful on me, as does anything white. Plus I WFH and have a sticky-fingered toddler, there’s nowhere I go that would warrant those kind of clothes. All my office clothes have been relegated to the loft now.

I also WFH but instead of an SFT I have a drooly dog, so all of my clothes are covered in snail trails of slobber from the hips down within half an hour of wearing . Gross

@NorthernTights you need clothes pegs! I cycle a lot, have even cycled in an evening dress on more than one occasion. You just need to peg the trouser legs tight at the ankle (or use cycle clips) and wrap full skirts across your knee and peg them in place.
Remember to remove the pegs when getting off your bike........

I’m flat chested and would never be able to pull off a dress or a t-shirt or anything that looks good with boobs

opposite problem - dresses and t-shirts that look fine on other people but have a touch lower cleavage or are bit more fitted and it's page 3 territory..

I too am a Viking, even designed to function better in the cold. I want to waft in floaty hippy dresses, hair in plaits, tie dye fabrics. I look like a tramp though who's just given up! I just don't suit it and it has a medieval peasant vibe on me, Lagenlook is the worst for me on this!

I am built like an ideal farmers wife - tall, broad and strong. Ideal for tucking a pig under each arm, not so much for fashion

This is also me - and again not even in a cool Barbour jacket and Hunters, farming-chic way. I’m just a big solid wench.

@Mermaidwaves I too am a medieval peasant! But a very short one.

I can easily give off busty tavern wench vibes if I wear anything too booby so I'm sticking to T-shirt and jeans and no mirrors.

@CornedBeef451

Yes I rock the tavern wench look too, there were lots of milk maid style necklines around for a bit which made me look like I'm in fancy dress.

Yep, I love bohemian stuff, all colourful scarves and floaty dresses and layers etc but I'm tall and fat and have massive boobs so that style just makes me look even more enormous.