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Original poster

What instantly ages?

985 replies

MadameNaice · 02/01/2021 21:57

Whether that be clothing or cosmetics, I'm interested to hear your opinions. I have a few of my own thoughts on this, though I could be way off the mark.

Am in need of a boost and think I might be unwittingly ageing myself before my time.

Thanks.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
25
PrincessNutNuts · 08/01/2021 18:59

@StarlightLady

Oh, and so called “nude” underwear. ‘Makes you look as if your crotch is made out of cardboard!
I don't show mine off very often... Wink
CandyLeBonBon · 08/01/2021 19:19

@StarlightLady

Oh, and so called “nude” underwear. ‘Makes you look as if your crotch is made out of cardboard!
So 'nude' underwear 'ages' you? Rightoooooo Confused
Craftycorvid · 08/01/2021 19:31

Read this as ‘rude underwear’ and my mind went off in a whole other direction.....

Maireas · 08/01/2021 19:34

Craftycorvid me too! Grin
However, I'm struggling to work out a) how it would age you b) how anyone would know

Gwenhwyfar · 08/01/2021 19:47

@Maireas

It's the 40 year old "cut off" that some posters adhere to that is so depressing. That's young nowadays, you could easily have another 40-50 years! For gawd's sake don't act like it's all downhill from there! Naga Munchetty has very short hair and always looks chic and stylish. Don't limit yourself because of your birthdate!
It's all downhill from about 20 biologically speaking. We decline and then we die. Sorry to tell you.
Maireas · 08/01/2021 19:57

Right, Gwenhyfar let's give up then!
Paper bags over heads and sacking for clothes! Actually, that would save time and effort....

Floisme · 08/01/2021 20:18

I've posted a couple of times on this thread, and might have said more but felt that responding to some posts would be about as productive as trying to engage with children playing Knock-a-door-run. But I did want to respond to the op because, although I might have worded the question differently, I very much get the feeling of being in a rut and needing a boost.

In real life, I think nearly all of us look within 5 years of our real age and that anyone who says otherwise is probably just telling you what they think you want to hear. But of course you can still look good.

I notice clothes first. Always have. Then hair and then face last of all. I'm not really interested in skin care or make up but I think anyone can learn to be dress stylishly if they want to.

I don't believe in finding your style and sticking to it. This is partly because I get bored and partly because, from what I've seen, your body and your appearance never stop changing from the menopause on. So I try and roll with it, I never, ever say 'I know what suits me now', I review and tweak things all the time and I try and always keep an open mind about trying new things. It means I make loads of mistakes but that's how you learn and, let's face it, I'm a 64 year-old woman and nobody's looking.

NiceGerbil · 08/01/2021 20:24

I think if you're in a situation where someone is seeing your underwear, then unless you have surgical enhancement, all bets are off when the bra comes off, especially if you have larger boobs Grin

There's no defying gravity... I hear it's the same deal with men's scrotums Grin the dangly bits dangle ever lower!

That's a good point...

What ages men?

XingMing · 08/01/2021 20:29

What ages men? Noses and ears continue to grow. Hair everywhere, except on the head. Beer bellies and general unfitness, and bad posture. Flat feet. Letting their OHs buy their clothes in M&S. Ceasing to care. Much like some women.

NiceGerbil · 08/01/2021 20:32

How many women have hair everywhere except on the head? Not many I would think.

merryhouse · 08/01/2021 20:45

@Doodallysally so what makes those boots not mum-boots when those in the first picture posted are? Is it the laces?

Every single picture of mum-boots posted on this thread has shown a different style. One person managed to get three radically different styles in the same post. There seems no consensus over heel, height, sole, colour, pattern - the only thing they have in common, in fact, appears to be no laces. Is that actually it? And is that why Doc Martens are not mum-boots but those black welly things are?

I'm not sure why I'm bothering to ask, mind - I can't walk properly in heels above 2 inches or anything that doesn't enclose my foot, and most of the nice footwear doesn't fit me anyway. Those nice hotter and ecco soles are my sad destiny.

And yes, many posters are confusing "aging" with "their idea of frumpy"...

merryhouse · 08/01/2021 20:48

Ah, I've just used nice sincerely and ironically in consecutive sentences...

Doodallysally · 08/01/2021 21:32

@merryhouse it's the sole. Those boots have a thin leather sole. The comfort rubber soles were generally intended for an audience putting comfort as a top priority over style. Hence they were not designed with aesthetics in mind, just comfort. Which means they aren't the most flattering on a foot and are associated with an older woman. Because that's who they were marketed to. So it's the connotations of the marketing and the target demographic that defines it, to me.

If those Hotter style of shoes ever feature in Vogue or worn by Cara Delevingne then yes, they'll be marketed as ' young and cool', and the under 30s will live in them. Atm though they aren't so they survive as a shoe for an older, less fashionable woman. Not saying I agree as I love a comfortable sole and would happily live in them, but am aware of the image they convey

I guess at the end though it only matters if someone wants to look their age or younger. And if people are comfortable with how they look, they shouldn't care.

NiceGerbil · 08/01/2021 21:34

Merry I think the basic problem is not the boot. It's the 'mum'. The idea that mum stuff is crap is really sexist ageist etc. Reminds me of 'MILF'- the shock that a mother can be anything expect unattractive.

I wonder if part of it is linked in to sort of

The age of invisibility- male gaze. I personally love having it lessened so much. I think a lot of women struggle with it though, having seen posts on here.

But then, women who do keep at it with the clothes and the makeup get slagged off as well I notice.

Whole thing is really a sort of societal discomfort with women thinking fuckit. That's not our role. To stop worrying about the male gaze is dangerous.

So all these mechanisms and judgements kick in, often vocally supported by women.

You have to be attractive, but not mutton dressed as lamb.
You have to try to look more youthful but never forget that you are not, that is gone.
You have to be sexy but not too sexy.
You have to walk this tightrope, keep spending time and money, feel insecure, and prop yourself up by judging others.

Yay?

Gwenhwyfar · 08/01/2021 21:38

"Reminds me of 'MILF'- the shock that a mother can be anything expect unattractive."

MILF is from a teenage perspective. It's not ageist and it's got nothing to do with actually being a mother. Youngsters will use it for anyone older than them.

"The age of invisibility- male gaze. I personally love having it lessened so much. "

Sounds like you're very attractive then. Easier to scoff at other people's effort not to look awful then isn't it.

Gwenhwyfar · 08/01/2021 21:40

@XingMing

What ages men? Noses and ears continue to grow. Hair everywhere, except on the head. Beer bellies and general unfitness, and bad posture. Flat feet. Letting their OHs buy their clothes in M&S. Ceasing to care. Much like some women.
Receding hairline. If they get bald, better to shave it all off than try to cover the head with a couple of strands. See? People comment on men too sometimes.
Gwenhwyfar · 08/01/2021 21:41

@Maireas

Right, Gwenhyfar let's give up then! Paper bags over heads and sacking for clothes! Actually, that would save time and effort....
"Noses and ears continue to grow. "

Apparently it's the face that recedes and it happens to women too.

Gwenhwyfar · 08/01/2021 21:42

Wrong quote in the post above.

Othering · 08/01/2021 21:43

@cathyandclare

Carbs are the most ageing thing for me. I usually stick to a lowish-carb diet but I ate waaaay too many over Christmas and have gained pounds- mostly under my eyes.

Fortunately I've got a long fringe to hide them Grin

Are you saying carbs have given you eyebags? My eyebags are horrendous these days and I do have a very carb-heavy diet.
Fluffycloudland77 · 08/01/2021 21:51

Facial bones do thin. It you can have surgery to basically scrape and irritate the bone so it has a healing spurt and lays down extra bone so their thicker afterwards.

Not going to lie, don’t fancy it.

cathyandclare · 08/01/2021 21:54

Yes othering I am. Bizarre I know- but they've already gone down after cutting back for a week.

They've been heavy above the eyes more than below. It may be because I've got small hooded eyes, or because I usually low carb but it is dramatic for me- unfortunately!!! The other thing that makes my bags worse is eye cream.

StarlightLady · 08/01/2021 22:16

To the doubters here, never being seen in your underwear probably ages you more. Laugh at me if you like, but at least I’m not in that catergory yet.

I’ll go and get my coat and my mum boots! Grin

NiceGerbil · 08/01/2021 22:25

But how does nude underwear age you if no one can see it?

Are you going for a psychological angle?

Surely you only wear nude underwear if you're wearing see through clothes to some extent? Which sounds pretty brave to me Grin

Maireas · 08/01/2021 22:59

Before lockdown I went in one of those very trendy Scandi shops and noticed that all the underwear looked very functional and either black or nude! The demographic of the customers definitely looked young!

CandyLeBonBon · 08/01/2021 23:00

@StarlightLady

To the doubters here, never being seen in your underwear probably ages you more. Laugh at me if you like, but at least I’m not in that catergory yet.

I’ll go and get my coat and my mum boots! Grin

Why would wearing nude underwear mean you're never seen in your underwear? I'm confused!!
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