How do some people manage to look so effortlessly cool?

[NotBigBrotherAgain]

Is there a secret to it or do you have to be born with some kind of special 'coolness' gene?

I'd love to be able to chuck on something vintage with a pair of Levi's and look cool, but instead I'd look like I had no decent clothes to wear and had just gone out in the first thing I grabbed off the ironing pile!

Is there anything I can do to make myself look a bit more edgy and cool?

I do think slim helps as you are less likely to end up a fat blubbery sweaty mess when trying to dress for summer (like me!).

What I find is-I put on a cool summer dress which would be perfect to wear on a warm day, but then I think that it's too low cut and booby, so put on a vest top underneath and then decide it's too short in the leg, so pop cropped leggings underneath it and then a little bolero cardigan as I don't like my arms etc etc. Then, I am no longer cool!!

I also know another woman. I would describe as cool. She is tall and thin with fabulous bone structure, in fact she has worked as a model. She had short dyed blonde hair.
I usually see her in flat shoes and she just owns the look she is wearing.

EmilyBronte I'd LOVE to be like that. Short crop and 50 something post menopausal pear shape doesn't fit that look though 😕

A lot of effortlessly cool women I know / see and admire often go for quite an androgynous look - mens clothing on a feminine woman looks particularly awesome

See also very cropped hair with a very feminine face

I used to have cropped hair but, the older i get, and with the addition of marionette lines and general tiredness of my features, I like to have hair to hide behind, for want of a better way of putting it. I cannot imagine exposing myself to the crop again, anytime soon.

Here, my quite boyish cut and now, longer.

Lovely bone structure Suki

Ta, User. The only thing my dad gave me that's been useful!

Marionette lines are cool. So are Number 11s and looking cross.

Floisme I like that! But sadly, mine make me look harassed and literally "down-in-the-mouth".

Might look up some exercises 😊

Would some brave soul please try fillers for marionette lines and let me know how they get on. Thanks 👍

I think it's less about what you wear and what your body shape is, more about good/ confident posture, a good resting neutral face and not that racing around flustered ineptness flapping that is easy to have with young children.

Being thin is a prerequisite I'm afraid.

Having a salon blow dry that has calmed down is good.

I recently swapped concealed for a pretty thin foundation and my husband who notices nothing has been raving about how much better my makeup looks.

I do like the skinny jeans and interesting top look. Interesting flats. I think Chanel or Tory burch flats are the death knelll.

Oh, I disagree with a salon blow dry. Well, maybe after it's been slept on for 3 or 4 nights.

I think a limited range of expressions helps. . So, don't turn your head to look at something, just your eyes.

I don't think there is a particular clothing 'trick' apart from not looking too done or perfect. I think it's more an attitude and an inbuilt air of confidence and being comfortable in their skin. Some people do, some people don't.

Jennifer Lawrence has it, Anne Hathaway doesn't.
Rihanna has it, Rita Ora doesn't.
Princess Margaret had it, the Queen doesn't

Oh and I am firmly in the 'no' camp regarding Alexa Chung. She always looks too try-hard. The hair is too deliberate, the outfits too studied. Genuinely cool people aren't that concerned about what people think, whereas Alexa - whilst she looks great - always comes across as dressing to impress for a fashion shoot or an interview.

I worked with some Parisians recently. All ages, men & women. Fashion bods. All thin (no eating, lots of smoking). They all looked incredibly cool. It seemed totally effortless, but in fact the clothes were very expensive. It was all very studied. They knew exactly where they wanted to shop, in a foreign city, & had done their homework.
None of them were "dressed up" or made-up. One had the holy grail of messy haircuts, another wore the most unbelievable scent I've ever smelled. They all had very expensive, beautiful glasses. No nail polish. No high heels. They did not appear self-aware but they certainly were, very much so.
Are the really cool people they ones who really don't care? Or do you have to work at it, like these folk? I thought I looked nice leaving the house, effortless even (which I pretty much was!) but I felt extreme uncool & like an absolute tramp next to these people!

The no nail polish thing is cool. As are not wearing high heels.

As is...

However not eating is pretty sad and therefore uncool. As is smoking. Ugh

The not eating was uncool. However, they tried to make me eat their cake... But I couldn't have any because I wanted to look cool. Sigh...

Parisians always seem to have insouciance down to a fine art - which is cool in itself.

I don't like the current trend for Insta-ready makeup. It looks too heavy to my eye and it's a bit of a contradiction, because someone who looks cool on Insta might not look cool IRL.

Smoking is not cool though. Neither is not eating.

@LazyDailyMailJournos I spend a fair amount of time in Paris for work, and all the Parisians in my company are all properly cool, because they're perfectly undone and not too polished and have a perfect air of insoucience

They ALL smoke and do have some weird talent of making it look really cool (when of course in the UK anyone smoking looks like fag ash lil)

Agree - Parisian colleagues have an unbelievable self control with regards to food. They do it but it just salad and yogurt.
But I love messy hair. Brilliant. A blow dry looks naff around them.

Ooh i'm tres intruigued by all these Parisians. I need more haircut info - do they have messy long bob type haircuts?
What shoes do they wear??
In my mind cool is a kind of tomboy chic - not sure if this is their look though?

I think there's different kinds of cool. A lot of this thread has been about a kind of 'rockstar' cool where you are cool by looking artfully dishevelled. But someone who doesn't give a fuck can look cool in different kinds of clothes. An academic's cool is different to an artist's cool or a rockstar cool. For us mere mortals the people who look cool generally do actually spend money on clothes regularly I think.

Otherwise I agree that androgyny is cooler than 'sexy', shorter hair on women and longer hair on men can look cooler than the reverse (not always though, sometimes they look very uncool), I think natural hair colour or deliberately artificially coloured (e.g. pink hair or Debbie Harry's blond on top of dark hair) looks cooler than dyed to look natural hair. Same with makeup, no makeup or very stylised makeup is cooler than what passes for 'natural' makeup. Clothing wise having one element that's out of kilter with the rest looks cool, but this is true of the way you decorate your house as well, I think it's just about that visual jolt being more interesting than everything being matchy matchy. Flat shoes are cooler than heels.

The Parisians don't eat thing is interesting as they take their lunch hour VERY seriously - we get a lot of push back if we arrange hangouts over their lunch hour

They definitely eat whenever I'm there with them over lunch and out to dinner! They wouldn't dream of going out drinking without going to dinner first - vs over here where we'll go straight from the office to the pub.

Maybe it's that they don't snack? They eat no differently to how I eat - although I'm v low BMI so probably not the best placed to offer a useful POV!

Looks wise it's definitely NOT polished, no blow dries or dainty skinnies and ballet pumps. It's a rock-y look rather than Parisian chic. Ripped cropped jeans, ankle socks with clompy boots, checked shirts, messy choppy bobs and hot red lipstick

That's the younger cooler girls. The slightly older women are a bit less grungey but still look more undone than polished

I work in the creative industries though, it's not a formal workplace