29 crepes a leaping.......

[magimedi]

Well, I've grabbed the bull by the horns & am leaping into the new thread........

Felt very sad no one else had started one whilst I scoffed dined.

If no one like the title I am more than happy to have it deleted & go with anything else.

DH has taken over the catering for the month of February......... the food is good but the angst is another matter

[motherinferior]

Idiotically I responded saying it was all under the care of an excellent GP and palliative care team but this has not shut her up. This was the aunt who nagged and nagged me to take tins of a particular supplement home from India to "build my mother up" when I was there. Because of course there is no UK equivalent and of course I want to carry a suitcase of this stuff.

[motherinferior]

I just wish they would all leave me alone.

[NUFC69]

Oh dear, MI. Much sympathy and lots of hugs. I hope your week is better than you anticipate, MrsS.

I am off on my annual retreat day later - a day of quiet reflection, with good friends and good food, what's not to love. It's a glorious, but cold day so even the drive will be a pleasure.

[Blackduck]

MI how about an auto-reply on your email (although I suspect this wouldn't stop them)

I had told dp to update his mum but she still insisted on speaking to me yesterday - could have done without it.

Ds excelled himself - breakfast, earrings, three course meal including the Rose Apple tart posted on FB... Need to get him cooking more often...

But feeling a fad liverish this morning.

Beachy hope you are feeling better!

[bigTillyMint]

MI, you are doing nothing for my stereotyped picture of Indian Aunties So sorry they are bothering you. Is there any way you can have their emails go to the bin spam box?

MrsS, don't worry about work - find out the name of the bar you were suggesting for Saturday and look forward to that

GGG, looking forward to seeing your outfit. Will it be very hipster?

Cremo, glad to hear your tea party went so well and that you have left-overs for packed lunches this week!

And NU glad you had a lovely day too.

I had a very relaxing day and then we went en famille for a curry - good catch up with the DC about stuff, both were on good form

[CremoLafoam]

MI , sorry you are having to manage all of the difficult relatives. Can't be easy. You are doing a heroic job , you really are.kbo

NU , have a wonderful meetup with your friends and enjoy the dry weather. Doesn't look like it will last too long

BD sounds like a KO day. Sorry it's taken its toll.

Trying to decide whether to phone in sick........feeling ropey.

[motherinferior]

I really don't know what to do. I also had (genuinely) kind texts from generous cousin asking me to ring my dad and ask him if he would like her to bring him a particular book for him (I told her I wouldn't be speaking to him till today and not to bother if she was leaving for the uk now). I was up at 1am worrying about it all for over an hour. My sleep is wrecked - I stayed in bed this morning but DP now grumpy because I disturbed him (and he gets grumpy because the only way I do get a relatively decent night at the moment is to go to bed fairly late, which he disapproves of). Other people are going to be berating me about how much my dad needs looking after - and nobody afaik is bombarding him with all these questions because he is known to be Too Distressed. I am at my wits' end and so exhausted.

[bigTillyMint]

Phone in Cremo!

[Blackduck]

Phone in Cremo...


MI - so sorry, I don't have it anything like you do and I am at the end of my tether because I am having to deal with aunts and mil etc because ddad just can't. I also get the brunt of his frustration with technology (phone signal on the train dropping twice on Friday) and he expects me to answer every time....

I want to crawl under the duvet for a day...

[motherinferior]

I think we are in much the same boat, BD! And I do have the advantage of being home and NEAR the duvet which I know is a real self-indulgence (cue further guilt and berating of self for wimpishness).

[magimedi]

I know what I am about to say is easier said than done, MI, but I do think you are going to have to get a bit tough with all your relatives. When your DM goes you are going to be left with the brunt of things (and your Dad) & you must look after yourself - it is so important.

I would compose an email saying how very tired/stressed/emotional you are with the situation with your DM & that you can't answer & deal with every tiny query. I'd say that of course everyone will be kept up to speed with what is happening & that you will send a group email every day/other day/twice a week. I would stress how run down & exhausted you are & let them get on with it. They are all asking far too much of you.

I am sure you will be able to word it much better than I could but I think you really should consider doing this.

Same thing probably goes for you, BD. If they are phoning you rather than emailing, I'd make sure their numbers go to voice mail and tell all the aunts & mil that you will call/email to update at set times.

My sympathy goes out to you both - it's so tough.

MI - for today, dare I suggest a relaxing 'lady splash' as a way of winding down a bit?

Much love.............

[MrsSchadenfreude]

MI - I agree with MM - send email and then disengage. Do not answer any plaintive replies (and there will be plenty of them), simply send another group update when you feel like it. Get their emails sent to another folder and don't look at it until you send the next group update (and frankly, I wouldn't bother then).

I will be on the 185 bus route on Friday, post op - do you want to have lunch? I have decided to take the rest of the day off, and not respond to whinings about whether I will be in later.

[motherinferior]

I know you are right. There isn't even any need for a regular update - nothing to say. It's the ones that sneak in, like the texts while I am out for the afternoon or this idiotic exchange. DP suggests a proforma reply. I may adapt it - making it less polite - and just reply 'Thank you for your email. I will reply if necessary when I can. As I am sure you will appreciate I am very under pressure and exhausted at the moment so am only responding if it is essential'.

[magimedi]

I think that reply sounds just right. Short & to the point.

[CointreauVersial]

MI, BD - that particular aspect of dealing with ailing parents is often overlooked, and I can imagine it must be hugely stressful. I think a round robin update is a great idea, then you can ignore all other communications with a clear conscience.

NU - have a lovely, restful day, sounds like a tonic.

Wow, BD, impressed by DS's culinary efforts. I did have dinner cooked for me, but it was a Waitrose pie and microwave veg.

Crem - get better soon.

I'm currently in Epsom Hospital awaiting fracture clinic appointment with DD1. Actually, it's quite clear she's right as rain, so it's really just a sign-off.

[herbaceous]

I second/third the idea of a round robin. Clears the conscience, while reminding aunties etc that they are not the only ones badgering you, and to give you an Effing Break.

I have a car issue. It's been v reluctant to start of late, sometimes doing it fine and sometimes not even trying. So I assumed it was a battery issue. Got garage to come and jump start it on Wednesday, then drove around for a while to charge it up. Yesterday, wouldn't start at all. But lights came on, leading me to suspect it was the starter motor or solenoid. Now the battery is so flat it won't even open the doors. Which means I can't open the bonnet for any oily mechanic to mend it. Oh dear.

[magimedi]

Can't you put the key in the lock, herbs?

I have just seen that I put the washing (cotton tops, shirts etc) on at 60 instead of 40 - I so hope they won't shrink.

[motherinferior]

Now I have my mum asking me about how do they sort out the DNR notice the consultant has authorised. I DO NOT KNOW. Why can’t my dad ring the GP/ consultant office and ask? I have said that’s what he has to do. I know he finds it distressing but I am exhausted, and I HAVE A JOB. Sort of.

[herbaceous]

Grrrr MI. He really is going to have to get some kind of grip at some stage.

And MM. I've just noticed the key hole.

[magimedi]

Oh MI - he really is the absolute limit.

Herbs - that's just the sort of thing I'd do - a real D'Oh moment.

[motherinferior]

In other news, the person I was meant to be interviewing for a feature this week has just resigned. Fortunately this is not my problem to solve!

[BeachysFlipFlops]

New thread alert, 'rising sap of Crepeys'

Please will someone word smithy come up with something

[herbaceous]

Spring is sprung, the grass is ris, I wonder where the crepeys is.

[BeachysFlipFlops]

I love that Herbs... Do it!