What does one wear to a swingers club?

[SnowNotSoWhite]

Apart from not a lot
Have no intention of getting totally bare assed in public so any ideas on nice lingerie and clothes that would, be, ahem, accommodating?

Aye see overit...you're really getting into it now ! (only teasing )

I have found this thread quite an eduction TBH.

And as for jealousy, yes I've seen both men and women get jealous. It doesn't work if one person really wants to do it and the other is just going along with it to make the other happy. That's why it's all about communication, honesty and trust.

I met a couple once and she said, her partner was so good at sex, she just wanted to share him with other women!! Can you imagine..??

Cuckold?! What's that?

Ahem I have more questions

Why did you go for the 1st time?

What would happen if you did meet someone and they weren't into it? Would you stop?

What about if you did meet someone and they were into it? Would that make you jealous?

as with 'spit roast' type it into a search engine for immediate enlightenment

The pornography that's grown up around swinging is nasty. It's all make me a slut and hair pulling. And eroticising aggression. But when you read defenders of it, it's all canapes and respectability.

I met a couple once and she said, her partner was so good at sex, she just wanted to share him with other women!! Can you imagine..??

That's part of what I enjoyed about it - when I feel all loved up, I want everyone to share that feeling, and it does feel very selfish to keep it between just two of us, even though I didn't love the other people.

If you are there by choice, rather than because your partner suggested it and you felt obliged somehow, and you don't feel jealousy, then as Destinysdaughter says, it really can make you feel absolutely amazing. But it won't be for everyone, because we're all different.

I think the sex goddess feeling is a bit odd too. Won't most men sleep with most women provided the women will say yes? If you take away fussiness, aren't you left with something not very special.

Thank you for your replies and suggestions .
Think it will have to be a Didrikson/ merrell, ash jalouse, Breton in true MN tribute.
Some genuinely entertaining replies and for Destinys honesty.
Have never been before, may bottle it. Will need a couple of drinks before I do.
Like sex and Am curious what its like, may just suss it all out and not wander into the spit roast room.
Buffet sounds good too, very Abigail's Party ( with sperm..)

The pornography that's grown up around swinging is nasty. It's all make me a slut and hair pulling. And eroticising aggression.

I've only experienced respect and consent, and definitely no hair-pulling or aggression. That's not to say it doesn't happen, just that it doesn't happen everywhere.

I'm not defending it! There's nothing to defend. I'm just trying to give some reality to the misconceptions around it. And saying that there are a lot of women that enjoy it. No one is forced, a lot of the men are very nice, attractive and respectful. It seems to be fun for a lot of couples. There's not much more I can say really...

nkf I agree about the pornography, it gives the impression that there are lots of women into swinging and that men are able to have access to lots of women and treat them in a degrading manner.

I think the opposite is true, it's the women who have access to a lot of men and if the men want to get any action at all they will have to be extremely respectful and make sure the women get what they want.

Just another way that most porn (because it panders to men's ego's) distorts the reality of sex

Sorry, Destinysdaughter, as soon as I pressed post, I realised I didn't mean "defend." People who explain it and take part as oppose to the pornography. Of course I know that porn bears only a superficial connection to real life sex.

EBear I am struggling the most to understand the non jealousy part. Take a fuck buddy ok i get that but to go with someone you love? To watch that happen? I just cant get my head round why that is a turn on.

I think the sex goddess feeling is a bit odd too. Won't most men sleep with most women provided the women will say yes? If you take away fussiness, aren't you left with something not very special.

I don't get your point about fussiness? Do you mean who you choose to say yes or no to?

Yes, most men probably will sleep with someone as long as they consent to it. I've certainly had sex in the past where there wasn't that much respect, but I've been treated well in clubs, and felt like a person who was involved, rather than just a human body being used as a masturbatory aid. I'm sure it's not like that every time for everyone, and there will be those who have bad experiences, but it's been a good experience for me.

The last partner I had, we found another guy online and we had a threesome. It was lovely. I enjoyed the fact that my partner was getting turned on seeing me with another guy. We all had great fun, it was v erotic and sensual. And.. As I keep saying, I was the one in control.

I think some people just don't 'suffer' with sexual jealousy, it's not a universal human trait, probably more culturally induced than innate.

The jealousy thing is something that I could never get my head around either. The only "spit roasting" that would be getting down for me would be of my OH's plumbs on a skewer over an open fire if I caught him shagging someone else, so I don't think I'm ready for a swingers club just yet !

Agree with Suzanne. It's totally the women who are in control.

Sorry. I'm not being very clear. To me, it's the I want YOU that is attractive. Not you and you and you and you.

Spit roasting is a horrible phrase. Talk about animalistic imagery.

I agree "nfk" but so are a lot of words to describe sexual acts. And whilst a lot of people don't like that phrase, the poster that originally used the term was describing an act which his wife apparently really enjoys so whatever floats yer boat and all that.

Why did you decide to go the for the 1st time?

Evil thought. We should have a MN meet up in a swingers club! That wound be so funny...