The power games thing, is, as EBearhug says, a risk in any relationship. Swingers just the same as in any other (know a couple of swingers who've broken up because the H was a lying, abusive, powergaming arsehole, who played outside their agreed rules and - in my view at least - proceeded to rape the OW on a later meeting. She won't take the matter to the police, to the detriment of my blood pressure and tooth enamel).
However, good relationships happen at slightly above the rate of the vanilla world among swingers. There's more communication and the 'I've lost all desire for him/her' doesn't seem to happen.
If you really want to see power games reined in (indeed, hogtied with a ball gag in), get on the fetish scene. Limits, consent, negotiation and respect are built into it. Those who overstep the proper limits get called out (there's a big stink on one UK local scene about it at the moment) - the OW above, who's a friend of mine, got an immediate support group once she began talking about what had happened (not, initially, thinking it was rape, I'm sure you can fill in the blanks yourself) and every single one was off the fetish scene. Including facing down the angry, drunken shit who was trying to gaslight her right in front of us.
When you're making a hobby out of power games you actually think about what is abusive, what isn't, what's consented to and what's not, what's safe with both parties' personal demons and what isn't. Outside the session it 's all the more unacceptable because it's cheapening, abusing, demeaning and perverting something that can be beautiful, romantic and artistic. Inside the session, it's done to the hilt, with gusto, and plenty of theatrics.
With, of course, a buffet afterwards. And, occasionally, pie.