How can I convince my step daughter to move back to her mums.
I am literally at my wits end, this has caused me to start self harming again as has triggered my abandonment anxiety, my kids are stressed too as they feel left again.
Basically we don't live with my partner, we have always lived separately but will stay at each others houses. For 5 years this has worked.
6 weeks ago via daughter fell out with her mother and moved into his. Since then he doesn't stay, we don't stay at his, he doesn't come back for lunch breaks etc. my life and my kids life is upside down. My eldest feels it's just someone else leaving him again.
Stepdaughter basically is loving living with him because he gives her money for whatever she wants, beauty treatments, clothes. She is 12. She is a little shit at school and he doesn't care. She ripped all her acrylics nails off as he wouldn't replace one broken one and he's now talking about taking her to have them re done again. He works all the time she is always on her own; she was caught by me cooking with hot oil and using a plastic coliandee to take food out the oil. I went mad as I was worried for her safety but her mother and dad had w go at me. Instead of thinking their 12 year old is home alone all the time and playing with gas flakes and oil. She wanted a new phone so she has the new iPhone 15 pro, her mum apparently doesn't buy clothes for her so he's constantly buying them. This means now he complained even more to me about the money I have and her and how skint he is. I have come to stay at his tonight as his other daughter is here. And he's so focused on what else can he buy this 12 year old. He's given her his bank card for his seperate account so she always has money on her. She is staying because of what she gets out of him. His ex wife is more concerned with what I am doing and saying on fb etc. I am at my wits end. I just want our life back. Where when my kids were at their dads we could have time to ourselves etc. He has booked to come on holiday to Greece with me and my kids, he's never come abroad with us as his ex wouldn't let him buy passports. But this year he's decided he will come, I am now worried he will bail because the daughter will have to go back to her mothers for the 2 weeks. And again this lets my kids down! I am so bloody fed up with this all. It's like he just can't see what he's putting me through. We had our set routine and life and now it's duxked. He's even said that since she been staying even if she goes back he won't be staying at mine as much because he's now use to not being up earlier as my kids get up earlier. It's literally ruined. I have come upto bed at 8 because I am just fed up of watching it all tonight he's not even bothered to come up. But says I am the bad guy if I leave and he will tell everyone it's because his daughter moved in