What happens re maintenance in this situation ?

[Chenillerug]

If a father is paying maintenance as has a good income so was paying enough to allow ex to just work part time but now he has given up work to be a carer so I assume it will go through the csa not a private arrangement and how is it worked out?

Ex is very unhappy but we have said although maintenance will drop we could actually have sd more so that ex can work full time which is reasonable but apparently not ?

Such a shame when he could have provided his kid so much more, such a weird situation whrre someone as wealthy as you say gives it all up to be a carer and can’t then afford to provide for his child. 7 quid a day doesn’t feed and house anyone.

@Endofmyteatherr yes or should have been used from the start to make it fair for all. But if they can't afford the £600 a month something has to give. I sympathise that the ex may not be able to change her hours but she may need to look at alternatives. Luckily she has no mortgage so that's one less thing to worry about.

@Endofmyteatherr - do you think OP shouldn't have kids due to her condition so that the ex wife can be financed? That's not fair either is it

The ex can tell them to FO but if he isn't earning she will have to accept she gets less money

Yes I've read it.

The whole thread is about money?

She wants to know how much they will have to pay now that he's not working.

What have you reported her for? I'm confused

@amiold there's a calculator online. How would the majority of us know what OPS partner has to pay in child maintenance don't you think that is off that OP expects us to know? Giving she seems very clued up on all the other benefits such as her and her partner can each claim as a carer. I too am confused, I think OPS post is odd.

It just all sounds too good to be true especially the house part.

How do you know when the health condition started?
Op could have had post birth complications or any number of things after her children were born. And disabled people are perfectly entitled to have children too.

Wow some of the posters on here! Unbelievable the lack of critical thinking skills.

Don't you think the OPs family will suffer too from a drop in income? Probably by a lot more than £400 a month!
If they are doing this then they must have just cause and have clearly thought it through and come to the conclusion it the best for the whole family!
Hiring in help isn't as simple as all that! Carers are in short supply! And add in sickness and holidays and reliability. It just may not be worth it especially with a child who presumably finds change difficult.
The OP and her partner already have the SD 3 nights a week. Which is almost 50-50. If they had her one more night a week no maintenance would be due. He's been paying a high amount of maintenance for that 1 night!

OPs family have chosen to have a drop in income - the EX got no choice in the DF of her child suddenly contributing very little and being told she can see her child less as compensation.

He's been giving her £600 whilst he's been working. He hasn't just said I'm not paying. Will she have also contributed £600. She has no mortgage.
This decision is for the health of his new wife and care of all children. Ex needs to suck it up in my opinion. She can work more if she wants, but that's her choice obviously

@CornishGem1975 I answered based on the back story I'm sorry if that doesn't sit well with you. However I don't understand why it's for the ex to consider OPS kids over her own. I'm just being Frank here. Report my comment if you like 👍

Unfortunately these kind of situations are the reason you are not meant to rely on CMS. My mortgage company wouldn't take it into consideration because it can change in an instant. It was annoying but I agree with that, so when I'm made financial decisions I don't take into consideration the money my ex gives me - it makes life harder sure, but if he lost his job tomorrow then that money would stop.

Of course the ex is going to be pissed off but there's nothing she can do about it. I don't think OP is dictating that the ex work full time or more hours, just suggesting that if she NEEDS to they will help more with childcare. I don't think that's an unreasonable offer.

@Endofmyteatherr The ex doesn't have to consider the OPs kid over her own, she just has to get her head around the drop in CMS.

Isn't that just the brakes though.

Can go both ways

Yes but you expect the OP to consider the step daughter over her own health and kids

I said me personally. I didn't account for all disabled people. However OP can't account for the ex either.

However if OPS condition is that bad personally I wouldn't be happy to leave my child at her house any more than the current arrangment it's sufficient and considering it's worsened she has her hands full with her own kids... like I said kids are not commodities perhaps the child doesn't want to go why are you and others the child has to go? How old is the child?

You have picked up the wrong end of the stick. Where have I suggested what OP should choose the step step daughter over her own?

I have merely pointed out that I'm aghast and the ex may not see it like that like she does. It's a perfectly reasonable opinion. I just don't agree with you on the matter.

You seem to be cherry picking my post. Do you have a figure the dad will pay seen as he has 3 kids??

"we have said although maintenance will drop we could actually have sd more so that ex can work full time which is reasonable but apparently not ?"

Completely and utterly unreasonable comment.
So just because your partner has changed their career you think it's ok for the child and the mum to have to experience further separation and completely change their living situation but all of a sudden NOW the dad is more available.
How on earth do you think the child and the mum would feel? Absolutely ridiculous comment.

As far as CSA is concerned I would recommend to go through CSA and it can be automatically arranged.

@Endofmyteatherr but you're challenging OP because she's doing what's right for her and her kids?

I don't have a figure know because I don't know the finances but if he's paying £200 to ex partner I'm assuming he can contribute £400 for his two kids who live at home ?

If he’s a high earner, perhaps there’s savings he could use to make up the shortfall?