Hi all. I have posted before about me and my DP attempting to sell two houses to blend our families - he has 2 DC and I have one, all under 10 - that all went a bit wrong after I realised he’d be better off financially and I’d be worse off (and the cost of living crisis is only getting worse) so I firmly suggest we park the co-habiting thing and revisit in 6 to 12 months whilst coming up with a plan that works fairly.
Subsequently my house came off the market but he kept his on with a sale continuing to go through (again, despite my concerns around housing / him uprooting the DC too soon / the strain that is already present in our relationship). It’s become clear that he’s assuming I’d be housing him and his two DC in my 2/3 bed home (I also WFH meaning even less space as need some kind of office set up) once his house goes through and until we decide to go for the bigger house. On top of this he’s decided to fight for 2 extra nights per month meaning he’d be completely 50/50 with the ex (mainly I believe to remove the need for CM and he thinks 50/50 will resolve all issues and he’ll never have to engage with Ex again).
AIBU for my actions last night - I basically said I was already concerned about his plans to move in with me (and how everyone would manage given the space) and I’m even more concerned that I have not been consulted on 50/50 (I have always supported him in this decision but we’d talked about going for it once In a suitable house). I basically said it’s nothing to do with me if he goes for 50/50, but this is my house, so if he wants to make a decision like that he should probably seriously consider his living arrangements once his house goes through.
Basically I think I just put the nail in the coffin but I cannot stand watching people make decisions that affect mine and my son’s life anymore whilst I stand idly by!!