@pinkyredrose
Tell her to grow up! She needs to realise that other people have lives
She's 14 Growing up is exactly what she IS doing!! FFS.
@Toughroadahead. Congratulations on your pregnancy🌸, I gather it was unplanned- maybe that's partly why you're so worried?. I understand you feeling anxious being pregnant right now, everything feels so 'all over the place' with pandemics, wars,cost of living, but people have had babies in dreadful times & that's life (literally) it'll all work out ((Hug))
As for SD, you say she won't come back to live... so where is she now?? Choosing to stay at her mums?
What are the other kids doing? (Same mum?)
I think her reaction is completely normal for a young teen whether step or not. Is she okn(safe) at her mums?
If she is & her mum won't make her go back to yours then all you can do really is wait it out. Her Dad should call her, send texts, maybe hugest going out for dinner (could just be McD's) prove to her that while he's going to be a Dad again, she's just as important to him as ever & he won't live her any less.
It's been a tough time during Covid for kids her age, grown ups are worried about Ukraine, fuel prices, general price increases and kids aren't immune from all the stress around them.
I presume she has a bedroom at yours? Does she share or is it just hers? Could you see if she wants to decorate it differently? (It doesn't have to cost a fortune) maybe she needs some reassurance her space will still be hers, can you give her some reassurance about that?
Any chance she's worrying about other things changing? Activities/having friends over etc.
You and her Dad need to talk to her & keep talking to her. If she doesn't want to stay can you pick her up just for the evening & go out for dinner or make pizza at home. Out is just easier to talk as no other kids around and you have to sit at the same table, not disappear into separate rooms.
There's no miracle cure, but it will all work
Out x