I'm a wicked step mother because...

[FleaBagLarry]

There have been a few refreshing threads on here recently where some of us have been a bit more honest about how we actually feel!

In light of this, in what ways are you the stereotypical 'evil step mother'?

It got me thinking before, in my case, I'm the evil step mother because my DSC are isolating for 2 weeks and as much as we get on, I'm bloody enjoying the break! I'm looking forward to it being over for DHs sake but for me selfishly, it's been quite nice having a couple of weeks to ourselves. (We usually have the DC 50:50).

I know it's absolutely appalling that I haven't been sat in a darkened room sobbing the entire time! So shoot me 🤷

No one has Covid, no one is ill, just isolating before anyone suggests I don't care they are poorly.

This made me smile. I think that's normal tbh and not an issue

Tong no ones ever called me evil haha but I know I'm 'frowned upon' shall we shall for enjoying trips /off breaks away with just my partner and toddler! And for supporting my partner in standing up to his ex and not allowing us to be walked over!

Because I won't look after DSC tomorrow night while his dad is at work, he has already stayed more nights than usual with set days changed, all to suit his mum who doesn't work so why the fuck should I look after him after a long day at work and my own child to look after? 🤷‍♀️

Because I care about them but I'm "not their mother" and have no right...

....Because it’s easier when he’s not here 🙈

How dare you not sit in a darkened room crying your heart out!

I'm a wicked step mother and mum because I got myself a coffee from greggs and gave the toddler a biscuit whilst we were out shopping, all other children were at school but non the less, I was the worst that day when they spotted the cake wrapper in the changing bag.

In a serious note, I'm the wicked witch of the West because after some drama caused by lying over two years ago I refuse to be alone with Step child and don't put up with there bullshit.

Because...they didn’t come to our wedding.

There I said it ffs.

Because I don't want my SD lifting her baby brother out of the bath. She's 8.

Because I also support their dad in standing up to the crazy assed mum.

Because I like days when it’s just my own kids without having to juggle the needs of primary school aged kids and bloshy teenagers

Because I resent the teenagers being so fucking expensive

I’m a wicked step mum because...

I refuse to mollycoddle a 19year old who hides from the world/refuses do a single thing for herself at the age of 19 yet expects to be driven around/taken out for dinnner/taken on holiday for the rest of her life.

No siree. No blended family here, so shoot me!!! Ahhhhhh, that feels better!

I'm a wicked stepmum because...

I'm hoping that SS(19) stays in his uni town for Christmas because when he's here he eats everything in sight, creates mountains of washing and doesn't lift a finger in the house!

@MellowBird85 oooooh I would be hung drawn and quartered even though it may still be a possibility that we get married alone. What happened in your situation??

I object when all the food has to be so very bland because she is so picky in his house and she still doesn't eat it yet wants to snack on sweets and crisps between meals not on my watch she won't and also when he cooks separate meals because, e.g. she sees a label of a jarred sauce she didn't recognise and therefore refuses to touch the meal. She is 9 1/2 ...

I'm evil because I'm very happy when they're not here. Period

I’m an “evil” SM because:

When DH and I got married certain members of his family were annoyed as our first dance was just DH and I. Apparently they thought we should have danced with the kids as a four so the SC were “part of everything” that day.

In the past I noticed items of mine go missing from my bedroom. Twice I challenged eldest SD who denied taking said items..... Twice I checked her bag as she was leaving to go back to her mums and found she was trying to sneak some of my jewellery and make up out of the house. I had a chat with her with her Dad present about taking things without asking. She kicked off. His family felt I shouldn’t have challenged her and just let it go. “They’re only possessions after all......”
Some jewellery I never managed to get back - the earrings from my wedding day and other sentimental or expensive pieces. Lord knows where they ended up.

When we moved house I was evil as the SC weren’t given the biggest bedroom. They were given the second biggest bedroom with an en-suite. That bedroom was on the second floor and I was told “you’ve shoved them in the attic!”

Every year I have a week away with DH and our toddler. It’s in term time and always a week when they’re with their mum so no contact is missed but again his family feel they’re being left out. Needless to say they enjoy plenty of other trips with their mum and come on every other holiday we have.

I’ve detached from them now (their behaviour and DH’s Disney parenting). I still chat to them when they’re here but all the parenting / laundry / school runs, etc are now up to DH.
He can’t understand it.

I would never say it out loud but I do prefer when they aren’t here - the peace and quiet / tidy home / cupboards not being completely emptied every day!

I could go on. Someone will no doubt be along shortly to say “poor kids”.

@Songbird232018 it’s the ultimate sin of a stepmother isn’t it! Basically, the situation was we got married abroad, 15 of us in total at a very adult-orientated destination. DSC (3 of them) were at very needy ages (which hadn’t been helped by Disney dadding) and I wasn’t willing to have my wedding / honeymoon ruined by constant “daddy I’m bored, daddy I want an icecream!” Stuff that. We did take them on a separate holiday earlier that year which they really enjoyed so I don’t feel quite so evil

@MellowBird85 in your situation I think that was a wise decision and completely justified.

Sounds blissful to me!

I’m a wicked step mum because I don’t believe that my pre teen DSD should have more designer gear and brand new technology than me and DH put together. She doesn’t actually know that I think that but DH thinks I’m mean for it. Oh and also that I think she’s capable of not leaving wet towels on the floor and putting food wrappers in the bin.

I'm a wicked step mum... As I think the children shouldn't sit on tech for 12 hours a day on the weekend and go outside, read or play board games.
Monstrous.

Quite simply I'm a wicked step mother because I'm not their mum! So I'll never be good enough however hard I try I'm always compared to her never seen as just me

@FoxtrotOscarPoppet
I’m here to say you have the patience of a saint. I’m afraid the theiving little brat would not have been crossing my threshold again unless she came with my things and a MONUMENTAL apology. Fuck sake.

Also, laughed out loud at this
Apparently they thought we should have danced with the kids as a four so the SC were “part of everything” that day.
Picturing a medieval style bedding ceremony as mustn’t leave the wee lambs out of anything

@FoxtrotOscarPoppet glad that I'm not the only one constantly getting input from OH family about the poor step kids, honestly they have a damn good life between both houses but the family is very much of the opinion that whenever they are not with their dad and me they are sat in a dark room rocking until the see us again! Ridiculous

Picturing a medieval style bedding ceremony as mustn’t leave the wee lambs out of anything.

@Youseethethingis the MIL did express her surprise that DH and I wanted to spend our wedding night - just the two of us - in the honeymoon suite. They couldn’t understand why we didn’t want a family room. At that point my Maid of Honour stepped in and offered some words of advice.

@Songbird232018 tell me about it. Plenty of deep cleansing breaths required when I’m around his family.
Thankfully my SIL has some sense and challenges the others when it gets too ridiculous.