Sometimes it is hard not being no 1 priority!

[malificent7]

I am well aware how selfish that sounds. We both have kids and if course they both come first. It can ge tough sonetimes when you cant move foward together as you'd like because kids come firat.
I think id feel that in a normal couple....not just a blended family.

Shes with the guy...thats how i know.Its no secret!!

I think i feel annoyed that she cheated on him but he is too nice and accomodating .

If someone cheated on me they would get nada....the kid would but the adult...no way!!

He is taking his child to school. You are making a mountain out of a mole hill.

No she’s not!
There are definitely worse things in life but co parenting with your own ex & trying to establish a new life with someone who also has kids with an ex are two very difficult things to do. The stress never truly abates if the exes are bitter & the emotional toil it takes is awful.
And there’s no point in saying you know what you’re getting into because we often can’t choose who we fall in love with & we’re all deserving of wanting to be happy.

Women fall in love with men who have other no1 in their lives, and they are not always humans. Sometimes I think my OH is more attached to his bicycle than me, or his golf clubs! Supposedly it's not so uncommon. Others are totally dedicated to their jobs.

I found it a bit hard before we moved in together because it meant so little time together, but after we did, it worked really well because I would suffocate very easily if we did more together. I have my life, my friends, my kids, my activities myself, so our marriage is based much more on quality than quantity which suits both of us.

I need a hobby...i have a few but one that gets me out would be good.

Really good points there Swingofthings.
I too have a very busy dp & I like the space tbh. I think the issue I have with his ex (& I think it’s the issue many of us have) is that she aims to control aspects of MY life & I really find that hard.
My exh was the same & I spent years reinforcing my boundaries until he finally ‘got’ it. With dps ex I can’t do that as she’s not MY ex & that’s the frustrating piece.
Dp is really good at saying no to her but when she uses the kids as emotional bait it effects everyone & that’s so tough.
Op - a hobby is a great idea - it will give you some independence outside of the situation & something else to focus on & look forward to.

When she takes the child to school normally do you view that as her running around after your DP?