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Share your tips for buying a first home with the help of family - £200 voucher to be won. This discussion is sponsored by Santander.

141 replies

LibbyMumsnet · 09/08/2021 14:25

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The ‘Santander Life after lockdown: the future of UK homeownership’ survey found that over half (52%) of first time buyers see raising a deposit as the biggest barrier to home ownership today. Parents and grandparents are playing an increasingly important role in helping their children get onto the property ladder. If you had or will have financial support from family members to buy your first home, we'd like to hear your experiences.

Here’s what Santander have to say: “When thinking about buying your first home family are often the first ones to turn to for support, with parents and grandparents playing an increasingly critical role. But it can be tricky knowing where to start. So, our Step up: Helping family to buy information pages on contain a wealth of information to help you get started.”

Did your family support you in buying your first home, or are they planning to? What type of support did they give you - perhaps a loan towards the deposit, or a contribution towards moving costs? How did getting help make you feel? Were there highs and lows, or impacts on your relationship with your family?

Share your experiences on this thread and you will be entered into a prize draw where one lucky MNer will win a £200 voucher for a store of their choice (from a list).

Thanks and good luck with the prize draw!


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Share your tips for buying a first home with the help of family - £200 voucher to be won. This discussion is sponsored by Santander.
OP posts:
GooodMythicalMorning · 09/08/2021 17:50

My parents put a lump sum in to our first house which we then paid them back. We wouldn't have been able to afford it without them loaning us that money.

BristolMum96 · 09/08/2021 19:25

My family supported us to buy our first home in the way of us staying with them cost - free. They weren't in a position to gift or loan us money.

YesIDoLoveCrisps · 10/08/2021 00:19

My parents helped us out with the deposit. We never ever would have done without them.
They also lent us a small amount of money for a couple months during the moving process as we had some unexpected costs. We paid them back when we had lived in and got a bit settled.
I hope I am able to help my children the way my parents helped me.

Nestofcrowes · 10/08/2021 08:57

We will be receiving help towards our deposit and moving costs from both sets of parents. We’re very fortunate in that respect. My mother will also likely follow us up north and will sell her London house, freeing up a lot of money for renovations of both new houses too. Very thankful and grateful.

MumC2141 · 10/08/2021 19:07

Lots of help with moving and furniture for the house.

KiriandWho · 10/08/2021 21:19

Our deposit came from inheritance from my FiL passing. To be able to raise a deposit would have been nigh on impossible after rent/childcare etc, even with 2 full-time salaries. Our monthly mortgage payment however is less than our rent!

BeanieBops · 10/08/2021 22:40

We had to move in with family in order to save enough for our deposit. We are so grateful to them for helping us in this way, as otherwise we just wouldn't have been able to save alongside renting. Although it has been challenging in many ways, and meant a change in everyone's lifestyle and daily routines, it has definitely been worth it for us and our family are overjoyed to have been able to help. Unfortunately this is very common, all of my friends who have been able to buy have either had to move in with family or rely on inheritance, often from tragic circumstances, to buy a home. Its nearly impossible for those who don't have these options.

LucettaB · 10/08/2021 23:01

We have asked my brother to loan us some money towards the deposit. The deposit was a little bit too much for us.

Richardjeff · 11/08/2021 00:16

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TableFlowerss · 11/08/2021 00:32


buckley1983 · 11/08/2021 23:38

We would not have been able to purchase our house unless my husband's parents lent us the deposit. My parents wouldn't have been able to afford to do so, although would have liked to. I found it very difficult (although obviously HUGELY appreciated it) because it was his parents, not mine. It's a horrible feeling not being able to afford to do it independently - but I think is the reality for most first-time buyers now unfortunately. I hope we will be able to help our son in the same way in future.

awonderfuladventure · 11/08/2021 23:53

We got no financial help but lots of help in other ways so didn't feel obligated to anyone. Just the way we like it.

Hillalilla · 12/08/2021 01:43

We were fortunate to receive help with the deposit from both my and my husband's side of the family; much of the money came from selling my grandparents' house after they passed away. As a family we never even considered another possibility, to be honest - saving for the deposit for many years while paying the rent felt like a waste. At least the mortgage payments go towards our own house, and I hope this will make us more able to, if needed, help out our son when he grows up.

voyager50 · 14/08/2021 07:14

I was very lucky I had the full support of my family when I bought my first home both financially and emotionally. They helped towards the deposit, all though I had a lot saved myself too thankfully.

My dad was amazing putting together all my flat pack furniture, my mum helped me clean the flat and my sister came round with chips from the chip shop as a treat when I was overwhelmed with it all on my second night there!

Kweenxo · 15/08/2021 22:46

Family gave interest free loan which was a MASSIVE help. Honestly, couldn't have asked for a more helpful family.

ruqiya1965 · 15/08/2021 22:51

Didn't get any financial support from family in the end, but I liked knowing the offer was there if ever needed and I'll always be grateful for that offer.

saffysabir · 15/08/2021 23:00

We will be getting help with any renovations needed, which is a considerable amount for us.

salemaxo · 15/08/2021 23:14

I've always had a great relationship with my family, so it didn't surprise me when they offered to help, because that's just the sort of people they are. I've always been grateful for any help offered at all and I took them up on help with moving home (including help with unpacking haha).

alshareif · 15/08/2021 23:35

I was also helped with an interest free loan, which honestly was such a big help and it helped me to feel better about it by knowing that my family wouldn't actually miss that money otherwise I wouldn't have accepted.

hannahbjm · 16/08/2021 14:10

No we didnt but am so greatful for their support in other aspects such as storage and packing etc

crusosa · 17/08/2021 19:57

I wish I could afford a house in London. I live in a beautiful rented house at a very affordable price because my landlord is a good friend of mine, but my husband and I cant buy a house or a flat and that's really sad.

UnalliterativeGeorge · 17/08/2021 20:02

We are being given a lump sum towards our deposit which is the only way we'll be able to buy a house currently. It has helped massively - buying a house was years away till this and it's a huge relief that when we do move we won't have to move again unless we want to. The sense of security is something money can't buy.

TractorAndHeadphones · 17/08/2021 20:04

Planning to buy first home with DP. His parents are giving us a sizeable amount as a deposit and mine a contribution towards incidental costs (like stamp duty, solicitors fees etc). Not expected at all, they offered and we are very grateful to them. It will enable us to buy a family home.

SnowyMouse · 18/08/2021 16:09

I wouldn't have been able to get a deposit together if my mum hadn't given it to me.

lyll · 18/08/2021 16:43

My MiL had done some very smart investments when my husband was very young. She invested in property back in the 90s and let the asset value grow. When my husband and his brother finished Uni, she sold the asset and gifted it to them as a deposit for them to buy their first home. She made it clear that will be their inheritance money and the boys have to get a mortgage to pay for the rest of it. Also, her strategy makes them both work hard in their career to pay for their mortgage. When I met my husband, I moved in with him for a few years and I was paying him rent and shared our bills when we were living together.
When we decided to get married, he sold his property which has again gained a significant amount of value. Since I had also been able to save a good amount of deposit over the years while living with him and not paying ridiculous London rent, this allows us to have enough deposit to buy our current house. Star I can't thank my MiL enough for her smart money management and teach his boys to be responsible with money. And also to my parents who taught me to save at least 1/3 of my salary every month. Star

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