Share your tips for buying a first home with the help of family - £200 voucher to be won. This discussion is sponsored by Santander.

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The ‘Santander Life after lockdown: the future of UK homeownership’ survey found that over half (52%) of first time buyers see raising a deposit as the biggest barrier to home ownership today. Parents and grandparents are playing an increasingly important role in helping their children get onto the property ladder. If you had or will have financial support from family members to buy your first home, we'd like to hear your experiences.

Here’s what Santander have to say: “When thinking about buying your first home family are often the first ones to turn to for support, with parents and grandparents playing an increasingly critical role. But it can be tricky knowing where to start. So, our Step up: Helping family to buy information pages on santander.co.uk contain a wealth of information to help you get started.”

Did your family support you in buying your first home, or are they planning to? What type of support did they give you - perhaps a loan towards the deposit, or a contribution towards moving costs? How did getting help make you feel? Were there highs and lows, or impacts on your relationship with your family?

Share your experiences on this thread and you will be entered into a prize draw where one lucky MNer will win a £200 voucher for a store of their choice (from a list).

Thanks and good luck with the prize draw!

MNHQ

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My Dear Aunt paid fully for my home.I had divorced my first husband and walked away with nothing.
I did housekeeping to an elderly gentleman.When he passed on I was given a council property.When it became possible to buy the house my Aunt paid for it in full...That was many years ago.I remarried and had a fa mily.They grew up and left home and when my husband passed on I was able to buy a bungalow.
She really did help me so much I will be forever gratefull

We was lucky to be gifted a large amount by our in laws when buying our first home that meant we only needed a very small mortgage compared to the actual cost of house, and my parents gave us a large sum to Decorate.

We are about to complete on a new house in a few weeks and my parents have given us over 100k towards house as this is one is alot more expensive, so to keep Mortgage low still they have given us this.

Both sets of parents have done exactly same for all our siblings too.

We moved in with family to save for a deposit for our house. I sold my car, walked everywhere, took packed lunches to work, put our social lives on hold. We paid a nominal amount of 'housekeeping' and my wonderfully kind Aunt saved it all and gave it back to us when we moved. It wasn't a huge amount, but it meant we could buy some new things for our new home.

Did they? Did they fuck! We bought our house with our own money!! I wish we had family support but we didn’t. We got fuck all support from family for anything!!

No, we did it on our own. The only help we received from them was staying with them briefly during house hunting in between when our lease was up and when we found the perfect house and moved in.

By them I mean my husband’s parents. I’m closer to them that my own. To add to this, there was a huge amount of contention between my sister and I over this. She’s 5 years older and we are very different. Her in laws paid for the deposit on their McMansion and they’ve bailed them out financially several times over the years. My sister would always make snarky comments about when we would finally buy a house, blah blah blah. She’s very materialistic. She squandered money, her husband became an addict, lost his job (worked as a nurse and was stealing meds from patients), many expensive rehab attempts, lost the house, and they now live in a tiny house in a bad area with 4 kids and the husband works at a bar (great idea for an addictive). I admit I’m petty but I do get a little bit of satisfaction over having done it ourselves and how things turned out for us versus them having everything handed to them and not appreciating it enough to keep it.

Our families weren't in a position to help, both sets of parents were in rental accommodation and living hand to mouth really.
We saved really hard for our deposit.
We are trying to buy less "stuff" for our own DC and putting all the money saved into savings for them so hopefully they will have a bit of help from us.
I predict the demise of big flashy weddings as well, all the young couples I know who are getting married are just having an evening party, with no extortionate afternoon wedding breakfast, cars, videos, professional photographers and make up artists etc.

My parents gave me money towards the deposit on my first flat, I could not have afforded to buy otherwise.

We have been putting money into savings accounts for both our children since they were born.

No we didn’t but bought our first home when 100% mortgages were available so didn’t need a deposit neither sets of parents offered any financial help

My family saved money for me from when I was born until I was 18. This let me put a £20k deposit down on my first property (This was twenty years ago.) I'd have struggled to buy without it - possibly I'd have bought a one bedroom instead of a two bedroom house.

My parents could not and would not help
(Financially, practically or emotionally)
Had to move from tourist south to industrial north to afford a place to rent then buy. Now criticised for moving away from family. Can't win!
Amazed how many have had help from family, I wish I had!

I was lent £10000 by my mother which was super helpful as it helped me cover all the extras like solicitors costs, surveys etc. I had to pay it back over next couple of years which left me quite strapped as interest rates on the mortgage were also high back then a couple of decades ago. But no regrets and I feel super lucky I managed to buy when I did. I will be helping DD out to the max when her time comes (hopefully).

My MIL gave us £15000 for our deposit. We were very grateful - both on v low incomes in London and it was just enough for us to get a mortgage and buy a flat.

My MIL was grateful to me for giving her son a kick up the bum and encouraging him to get and keep a job

Oh and I hope to help my niece and nephew to buy in future, thanks to her generosity and support.

My parents gave me an inheritance early (£230k) which outright bought my house. I appreciate I am extremely lucky in this respect, however DD and I are extremely close, see them almost every day, and were living in a dire pit of a council house with utter scroates as neighbours, as I am disabled following repeated medical negligence and my Father's one wish was to see me and DD settled and happy.
My parents have worked hard for everything they have, working their way out of poverty and are very frugal. They are well off but not rich by any means. As previously stated, I am aware how very lucky I am.

My parents had been saving since I was a child and had saved up £4K over 25 years for my wedding. I suppose that must have been about £13 a month they put by. That would have been quite a lot back in the day but not much nowadays, but the £4K is still quite a lot!

I did not get married and was given the money as a deposit for a house.

This proved the only way I could get on the property ladder. I’m still there many years on.

Without their help I wouldn’t have been able to get on the property ladder. I was too busy spending money. The best thing a parent could do is to do what mine did. Put by a little each month. It soon mounts up. Oh and take digs money from the working children while at home and put some of that by for them too. If you don’t take it from them they won’t save it.

I was lucky as my employer had a pension scheme or I’d have needed to do that too (and wouldnt have and regretted it later)

No, and my kids won't either. We have retirement to fund!

However it's all about attitude. People do not need the latest trainers, a new car, to spend thousands on foreign holidays. We were brought up to spend a little and save a lot.

DD1 (early 20s) has saved enough for a 10% deposit - not able to buy in this area yet as her basic salary is too low currently they'd never lend enough she needs nearer 30% deposit, but could afford to buy in many parts of the country. She works but could do similar job elsewhere in the country, and also gets paid lots to ride other people's horses so saves more than most people her age earn before tax, she has saved all her birthday money, pocket money from a small child, also worked and saved money through Uni, and never has any time to spend any money anyway!

No, neither of our sets of parents are in a position to help, and we obviously can't afford to save a deposit on our own with the way house prices are currently, so we are in our 12th year of private renting, we are also priced out of the rental market and so can't move so 7 years in this house so far..

My dad was a builder, he gave me and the then husband a third off the price of a detached house. Then when the divorce happened, he helped me by doing up my own little house. I haven't been in a position to do that for my daughter, unfortunately.

They helped with some funds towards the initial deposit and then helped buy some of the initial items we needed in the house like light fittings and a fridge. Wish that there had been more advice on actually the best way to have a mortgage back then - I think that would have been really valuable if they had shared their advice but I suppose things change all the time so might not have been relevant but our first mortgage was fixed and didn't allow overpayment but would have been better to have had something more flexible at that time pre-kids when we could have put more towards it. I hope we'll be able to help our children when the time comes but who knows with how crazy house prices are in relation to salaries.

Yes I got help, DPs effectively paid me back the rent I had been paying to live with them to go toward my house. I had been paying them rent for about 11 years when I bought, so it was quite a bit.

Then when I got married a couple of years later they paid off the small mortgage as a wedding present.

I was lucky to get on the housing market in the early 2000s just before house prices got silly. The house increased in value by almost 100% in three years, if I had waited any longer we wouldn't have been able to afford it even with help.

My Dad gave all three of his children money that helped with deposits. I am so grateful to him

We were gifted a 5% deposit (not in the UK) by my parents as first time buyers which we couldn’t have saved ourselves while renting. It wouldn’t have been enough for us to buy in the UK. If we hadn’t emigrated we would still be renting.

My parents didn't help financially but I managed at the time. I have no idea how my teens will ever afford to get their own places. Right now my aim is to get them to university or apprenticeship and want to do well in their studies. Hopefully a well paying career will follow, and they (& any partners) will be welcome to live with me for as long as it takes to save a deposit.

Both pil and my parents helped...some of it was money, some was in plates etc and time moving us...