Mumsnet users share their experiences of trying to conceive with Proceive

[EllieMumsnet]

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Trying to conceive can be straightforward for some and a struggle for others. From deciding to start the process of trying to conceive to the emotions that surround the journey, it can feel like quite an overwhelming time. Proceive would love to hear your experiences of trying to conceive and how the TTC chat came about with your significant other.

Here’s what Proceive has to say: “Embarking on the TTC journey is emotive for many people and for many different reasons, we are keen to know what emotions were stirred up when you and your partner decided it was time to start trying for a baby. We know the average time for a couple to conceive is 12 months but we want to hear from you and find out about your experiences and feelings around this time in your life.”

What were your expectations of trying to conceive and how did they compare with the reality? What changes did you make, for example around your lifestyle or diet, when you decided to try to conceive? How did you and your partner agree to start trying to conceive? Or did you find that when you stopped trying, it just happened?

Whatever your experiences of trying to conceive, share them on the thread below to be entered into a prize draw where one MNer will win a £300 voucher of their choice (from a list).

If you would like to be in with the chance of winning 3 months worth of Proceive, then please click here

Thanks and good luck
MNHQ

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We started trying around four years ago. After several miscarriages between 5-24 weeks, I was diagnosed with endometriosis. Even after laparoscopic surgery, I was told it was highly unlikely we would ever conceive naturally or have a viable pregnancy. We kept trying, well, not trying deliberately. More just not being careful because we both sort of thought, well, if nothing is going to happen what's the point?

Last year, we had DS. I'm still in disbelief now. I often go and stare at him when he's sleeping after convincing myself I'd never be able to have a baby, it's just amazing. All of pregnancy was terrifying, with heavy bleeding. I was convinced he was going to die, and wasn't sure I could go through another loss.

I didn't realise the depo injection could take so long to leave your system, so was trying much longer than expected. Ended up using opks and getting to know my cycle very well, so am pretty sure we conceived the first or second cycle I ovulated properly after coming off depo - well over a year later. Could have been coincidence but I stopped drinking that month. Second time, had sort of decided another baby might be nice, bam, pregnant - bit of a shock!

We started trying and thought it'd happen right away. Two cycles in, we had a chemical pregnancy and then I skipped a cycle after that. Next month was our last month of trying that year as we were having a break over Xmas if not preg by then. I made poor DH quite stressed that month by going all out with opks, temping, etc. Well, it worked! I never got to have that Xmas drink back in 2014 and our wonderful DS was born the following summer. Turns out I was just ovulating later than we thought!

I've got polycystic ovaries and knee we would have difficulties when we decided to TTC. We started off fairly relaxed about it all but I quickly started tracking BBT, using ovulation sticks and becoming pretty obsessed about the whole thing. I hate to be the cliche but the one month I relaxed was the month I conceived. I'm not sure if we're going to have another but if we do I'll try and relax a little more (not promising though!)

We decided after a couple of years together that we wanted to have a baby. We started trying, tracking using Glow and making lifestyle changes. 4 years went by, I found out I had PCOS and T2 diabetes, we got married. It was a really horrible time in our lives. Then I decided to take things into my own hands and lost 5 stone in 6 months to get down to a healthy weight. Fertility doctors put me on Clomid and then we conceived our beautiful son (now nearly 3) the first month of taking it.

Second time around it's been 15 months, we've had 4 miscarriages in that time and I've just found out I have Thrombophilia. It's never easy but will be worth the wait.

DD took 6 years of trying, just after we’d moved house and decided we would try IVF I got a bfp.

Second time we are 16 months in TTC DC2, started off relaxed. Then did opk’s/bbt/clearblue monitoring. Then in an attempt to relax we stopped all that. It still hasn’t worked, sometimes it really isn’t as simple as ‘relaxing’.

I wouldn’t wish this journey on anyone so I’m genuinely pleased that so many people conceive quickly, but my god does it drive me mad seeing comments like ‘just relax’ and ‘didn’t stress/drink/eat junk food that month’ I wish it was that simple for everyone but it isn’t.

We tried for 7 years before DD was born. Before then I had two miscarriages (11 & 5 weeks), countless invasive tests, a clinical trial, failed IVF and Hysteroscopic metroplasty surgery.

But she was worth it all!

We started trying on our honeymoon, assuming it would happen immediately for us. We were both healthy, fit 30 year olds. We had talked for a while about starting a family and didn't quite feel 'ready' but felt there would be no better time...

After the first few months we realised it wasn't as easy as the movies had led us to believe. I got worried that something was wrong and sex started becoming a bit of q chore. I started temping and using ovulation tests. I drank green tea and used a castor oil pack. I ate less sugar and more vegetables - however, I realised i had liw body fat so I made sure I ate larger portions of good than usual and put on weight. I hated the weight gain but thought it might be important. I actually started getting quite miserable about it and cried each month when it didn't work out.

After more than 6 months we decided to pursue some testing. I didn't realise the average time to conceive was so long - all I kept hearing was 'it just happened.' I think people need to be more honest with each other about how long it takes as I thought something might be wrong with me. Eventually, I stopped expecting it to happen each month and threw myself into sport and looking after my wellbeing instead. I started to feel happier but there was an underlying feeling of dread that we'd never have a family. I wouldn't have cared if I had to wait 5 years - but it was the not knowing if it would EVER happen that was hard to deal with.

On the day my husband was due to go for a sperm test, I got a positive pregnancy test! I thought my period was coming so it was very unexpected. We were in a state of shock. When we finally got my husband's results, it turned out he had some problems with his sperm so we were very lucky to have conceived!

I'm now at 30 weeks and looking forward to meeting our son. Even though he is very much wanted and we tried hard for him, we still don't feel 'ready' - I don't think we ever will. It's scary! But the most exciting thing we have ever done.

DC1 came off mini pill first proper month of trying and bam was pregnant. Was a surprise as was told it might be difficult as have interactive thyroid. DC2 bit more of a journey but got there. Tracked cycle with app, tried preeseed, ovulation sticks what did seem to help was 7 seas pre conception vits and drinking nettle tea...tasted like bloody pond water! Had a few chemicals and eventually got there...now wondering whether I could go through all that again and try for DC3. Good luck all

I was a bit naive and just presumed once we'd made the decision and started to try for a baby it would happen easily and quickly. We were lucky as we did conceive within a few months but when it didn't happen month 1... then month 2... you start to wonder.
We didn't use / do anything specific to help us conceive but I did get a little obsessed with dates and when would be a good time to DTD!

I fell pregnant within 3 weeks both times. When we first started trying i thought for some reason it would take 6 months or so to get pregnant so we weren't really as sorted as I would have liked to have been. The second time we waited until we were ready to be pregnant straight away.

I don't know what I really expected - I just had this overwhelming urge to have a baby, as a couple we agreed and then carried on as normal. After a year, I did the hormone dip sticks and tried to keep to getting piggy when we were more likely to get pregnant, after six months, I stopped with the sticks, then we just got piggy and I just knew in that instant I was pregnant!
Bonkers, no rhyme or reason, just Mother Nature at her best

Pregnancy 1: DP suggested it when we were on the way to the pub. Conceived quickly, but sadly it was ectopic and I lost a tube.

Pregnancy 2: Again conceived quickly (within a couple of cycles of trying). DS now 3.

We’ve been trying for DC 2 for close to 2.5 years. I’m on the verge of giving up, I can’t take it any more. I’ve been charting my cycles and taking supplements, I’ve had all the assessments I can on the NHS (including a HyCoSy) and nothing.

Didn’t think I’d be able to conceive
Fell pregnant by accident
Then second pregnancy was happened quickly following decision to start trying
No changes at all to diet or lifestyle

I struggled and ended up with a diagnosis of endometriosis, I was lucky that we got there in the end though and it was all worth it. When I first got the diagnosis I thought it was game over, all I could find was bad news, i am one of the lucky ones and so grateful for my DC

Had five MC over two years of ttc, during the last one which was a MMC I was convinced that was it my last chance over, and then following lots of complication and a repeat SMM, I was too scared to try again as I don’t think I could mentally or physically go thro another loss.

We then had DD successful last year conceived on holiday. Her birthday is same day as I had surgery for my MMC. So very bittersweet, but I can’t be sad on that day watching her five tooth gummy smile.

We fell pregnant with DS after 6 months of trying (with an early m/c inbetween) - I know this is relatively quick, but it felt like forever. I took supplements, used ovulations testing sticks & cut out caffeine - I don't drink alcohol anyway so that bit was easy!
We are trying again now & I had forgotten the stress!! I've got an the Flo app on my phone which is genius! Also doing the ovulation test strips again. Will look out for the Proceive supplements, haven't heard of these before. I used Pregnacare last time.
Good luck all who are TTC & congratulations to those who have :)

I'm newly pregnant with number 1.

My friend had taken several years to conceive and I was worried it would take a long time.

4 weeks later I was pregnant! First month off the pill. I did use OKPs and DTD every day. We also took preconception vitamins, had a healthy diet, and used a fertility lubricant.

But I suppose we were just lucky. It's been a very happy surprise for it to happen so fast!

I uses a Basal Thermometer (which I won from Mumsnet !!! thanks guys) checked the temperature, and on month 2 I fell pregnant. After reading the comment above I feel blessed.

We started TTC first time about 3 months before we got married, based on the number of stories we'd heard about it taking a while to conceive.

I was 11 weeks pregnant on our wedding day, conceived at the first attempt!

Second time, we conceived at the second attempt!

After losing an unplanned pregnancy in June 2017, at 19 weeks, we were devastated. December 2017 we said that we would start trying in the new year as we both realised how much we wanted a child together.

My period was meant to start on my birthday (Dec 23rd) but was irregular for a couple of months before so I didn’t think anything of it. Left it until January and ended up going to the doctors thinking I had the flu. She did a pregnancy test for me and the lines were bold - definitely pregnant.

Thing was, I had started bleeding that day so was in tears at the thought of losing another pregnancy. Was sent to the hospital on January 6th for a scan.

For the two days between the doctors appointment and the scan, I had been joking that we were going to be having twins (after being told that the bleeding was probably implantation bleeding).

Lying on the bed being scanned, I looked over to the screen and saw two sacks and heartbeats!! With how I was laying, I couldn’t twist my hand to say that we were having two and ended up holding up two fingers to my partner... he thought I was swearing at him until the sonographer started laughing at his reaction!

It feels as if this pregnancy is making up for the loss but there’s still a missing piece.

We feel so blessed to be able to have this

I came off contraceptive (the Evra patch) after around 8 years of being continuously on some kind of pill or patch. Came off that in the September, but didn’t have a period for over two months after my withdrawal bleed. The next cycle was into triple digits! Went to the doctors who agreed to send me for internal scans and blood tests - blood tests were fine but internal scan revealed polycystic ovaries on both sides. Doctor was lovely but fairly noncommittal and said we’d still have to wait until we’d been trying a year to get a fertility referral although she agreed the polycystic ovaries could make it more difficult for me to fall pregnant.

Went away on holiday in the April, had previously been eating reasonably health and drinking little, however ate like a horse and drank all the sangria I could get my hands on, and fell pregnant while we were away! Currently 17 weeks with my little girl :)

Even though our 7/8 months was not long at all in the scheme of things, I found it really difficult and definitely fell into the trap of OPKs, temping etc. Found a really lovely group of women on here though and we have a fab whatsapp group which helped massively when I or any of us just needed a moan to someone who would understand!

I was preparing myself for waiting a long time to get pregnant. No reason for me to think that I just did. We were amazed when I got pregnant straight away.

I ensured I had a very healthy diet in the year leading up to trying to conceive, including taking multivitamins includingfolic acid. I ensured I only had one glass of wine a week too. Still took a year to get pregnant, then miscarraige then another year and a half.