How do today's teenage stresses compare with the kind of things that stressed you out when you were a teen? Talk to the National Citizen Service and you could win a £300 Love2Shop voucher NOW CLOSED

[MichelleMumsnet]

We've been asked by the team at NCS, the country's flagship youth programme for 16&17 year olds, to find out about Mumsnetters' opinions on the kinds of things that stress your teenagers out and how this compares to the trials and tribulations of growing up when you were the same age.

How different is life for today's teenagers? Do you think young people today are under more pressure to keep up with trends and technology? Or perhaps academic expectations are more stressful now than they were when you were young? Are you glad that social media wasn't as important when you were a teenager? What about things that really stressed you out that don't feature in modern teenage life at all?

Natasha Kizzie from NCS Trust says: "The start of the new academic year is particularly challenging for 16 and 17 year olds today. They are not only dealing with the day to day pressures of social media, coursework and exams, but they're also tasked with laying the foundations for their future after school or college. With pressure growing, it can be difficult for both teens and their parents to take a step back when it comes to making decisions."

"NCS is a truly unique experience that takes teens out of their comfort zone with lots of new experiences, an away from home stay and the opportunity to make lasting new friends friendships. It is an invaluable opportunity to gain confidence and develop the skills they need to follow their dreams."

Share your thoughts on this thread and you will be entered into a prize draw where one MNer will win a £300 Love2Shop voucher.

Please note your comments may be included on NCS's pages on MN, their social media channels, and possibly elsewhere, so please only post if you're comfortable with this.

Thanks & good luck,
MNHQ

I remember being so carefree and not really stressing about anything in particular but my older kids really do stress about a heck of a lot of stuff from School work and friends to skin problems. Being accepted and exam worry has been a big issue, exams really made my eldest son stress so much that each year around exam time he suffered with Psoriasis until he finished 6th form. I do blame the internet and mobile phones for a lot of their worries too but can't see that ever changing now as that technology for you it can do so much good but also so much bad for our young people.

I don't think my teens currently have a very stressful life, they are 15 and 14, they aren't particularly susceptible to peer pressure and their school is quite relaxed.

They'd remind me (if they were reading this) that there is a lot of self harm and depression among their peers, but I remember that being the case in my day too, maybe it is more talked about now, but there was a lot of self harming and anorexia around in my teen years. It's not new.

But I think their generation will have a lot more pressure at the post-education stage. Jobs are much scarcer, housing costs so much, they'll have loads of student debt. Those early 20s look far less enticing than they were for my generation.

My teens are not particularly stressed either. They take social media etc with a large pinch of salt, and get a heck of a lot more support than we ever did as teens.

Mobile phones! When I was a teenager, my Mum didn't have a clue where I was from morning through till night. Now, kids have their phones at their finger tips and there is no excuse not to let your parents know where you are. :)

When I was a teen we were under a lot of peer pressure to have the "right clothes" etc nowadays with social media I think it is a lot harder for teens to fit in and not be bullied for not having the latest expensive clothes/ technology

My DCs aren't teens yet, but from younger cousins, it's noticable how much more pressure they were under to do well academically, and how harder it is to have a route to well paid careers if you don't have a degree.

Being expected to 'grow up' so quickly... I had baby dolls in a toy cot in my bedroom during my last year of primary school, and still, along with my friends, enjoyed Sindy dolls after starting secondary. Now it's all about rushing to behave like some kind of fantasy teenager. Yes, I know that things move on, but I got my first brick mobile phone when I was at university. Now there are 8 year olds in the school I work at who have the latest iPhone! Just who are they going to be ringing?!

YY to previous posters who talked about the rise in social media- never being able to 'get away' from issues at school, and potential bullying. I imagine that must be absolutely suffocating for a lot of young people these days. And of course, of huge significance is the rise of 'sexting' and misuse of apps like Snapchat- quickly something that seems like fun can end up with young people genuinely terrified and in some cases suicidal about pictures being 'out there'.

Also, the financial pressures associated with fitting in- previously it was the right jeans, or backpack, which was bad enough, but now it's phones and tablets which are so much more expensive and potentially out of reach for a lot more young people.

To be honest when I was a teen 20+ years ago life was much simpler and easier… my only worry was how to get this boy next door to like me…

Now, with internet everywhere life got faster, news travels instantly and kids have to stay “on the ball” all the time which is putting much more unnecessary stress on them

Social networking I think is at the root of a lot of the pressures. Selfies and the potential to be snapped anywhere make a lot of teens go out of their way to always look like celebs where in my day a shell suit and a quick squirt of my wet look mousse for my perm was all I needed lol

The usual stresses of embarrassing parents, but also now the added extra stress of not being able to switch off from gaming consoles, iPads, etc!

For my two teens DS16 and DD12 academic stress is far higher than in my day. They go to Grammar schools, as did I but while in my days A grades were rare and applauded nowadays only A*s are good enough. Plus to get into a good university there's pressure to build a good cv with lots of other things too like volunteering, music exams etc. Grade inflation and 50% going to university make it more difficult to stand out. So more pressure!

There's little time to switch off and get bored. DD has What's App on her phone and there seems to be a permanent conversation going. While we used to meet up and 'hang out' in the park or bus station, DC seem to chat to their friends online in games or FaceTime etc. As a result I don't know their friends as well as my mum knew mine.

Life was so much simpler - so far less stress

Technology can mean that certain problems come home from school, such as bullying, which didn't happen prior theinternet/mobile phones. Also the risk of having images, not necessarily of an indecent nature, but sometimes just an embarassing moment, pop up all over the internet is a worry. Education plays a really important role in these aspects and as parents, we have to teach our children to keep safe, not just in real life, but also online.

However, technology also has its benefits for teenagers. Eg when we moved to a different town, facebook softened the blow of moving away from friends, as it meant the kids could keep in touch with their old friends. They still talk to some of their primary school friends 9 years later, which wouldn't have been realistic in my teen days.

Also when DS1 was about to start university, the internet allowed him to start getting to know his new flatmates online, before he even set off. This meant that people felt familiar and the experience was less daunting than it was when I went.

To be honest, I think the main worries for teenagers are the same now, as they they always were. Kids still worry about being popular, how they look, wearing the "right" clothes, passing exams and whether or not that gorgeous girl/boy will ever notice them!

I feel we were a lot more naive - no social media obviously but also growing up in the 80s, we didn't know so much about nutrition or dangers of the sun or the impact of screen time....we just sort of went along with everything and didn't question too much.

Also reality TV - my kids think that by getting on TV, they'll be rich super stars over night

I think the pressures are different but would argue that teens are under pressure to be more PERFECT than we ever were.

Some of it is down to peer pressure but much is unfortunately down to parental over-investment in their DCs. I challenge any of you born and brought up in the 1960s and 1970s to recall the notion of helicopter parenting - it didn't exist.

So sadly much of the pressure on teens actually comes from home .

I think that social media makes teenage life nowadays tons more stressful. When I think of some of the things that I did as a teenager, my life would have been over (so to speak) if my antics were filmed on a smartphone and posted to Facebook. I have a 15 year old sister and she gets up to the same things that I did 15 years ago....the only difference being is that we all know about it by looking at her snapchats, instagram, Facebook etc!

When I was a teenager and you fell out over something you left it at school when you left for the day. These fall outs where petty and would more often than not be forgotten the next day. However, today I think teens have it harder. Those petty squabbles go home with them now they have access to social networks.

There is much more pressure to have sex and lose their virginity.

I think the popularity of smartphones and the invention of social media is something that horrifies me and I can't think of what it would be like to be a teen again. It was just starting to become popular when I was at college, chat programs on MSN and Yahoo were really in amongst my group of college friends and I remember sitting chatting for hours. I did have a few bad experiences but I can imagine it is much worse now!

Selfies.

When I was 14 I was only bothered about 1 boy 'liking' me but now if a new profile picture doesn't hit double digits in likes then it is a massive failure.

I suppose it is wanting to review mass adoration that is the difference, I only needed my close mates and teeny bopper boyfriend but now it seems your whole year needs to be living the way you look and the content you post online

There is constant financial pressure for today's teens. When I was a teenager going to uni was funded by a grant, and provided a way out of poverty for a lot of kids. And you had the freedom to study something which actually interested you rather than something solely tailored to getting a job. Now a uni education is just a means to an end rather than a life experience, and saddles teens with debt.

The world seems a more frightening place now, especially with the concern about climate change. But then again I remember being stressed about nuclear war!

The stress of exams seems higher

Where we had the fear of nuclear war I think today's youth fear environmental issues eg global warming, species extinction, drought, desertification, over-population.

The internet and social media mean that teenagers don't get a lot of 'down time' from a hectic world.

Brand awareness and personal looks seem to cause more angst than in my day.

I was 16 about 13 years ago and not much seems to have changed, more sophisticated mobiles so no need to log in to a computer to chat, but I think they spend about the same length of time using chat services. I may not have had Twitter or Facebook but we had bebo and an online diary type thing- I got trolled but I suppose it was likely they knew me rather than a completely random hate which sometimes seems to occur nowadays. And depression and sadness seem to be the same for the modern teen. I guess ask again in 15 years and there might be some noticeable differences.