The Goose & Carrot Pub

[RedRegular]

A thread for all who have DC with SN. The thread is deleted in 90 days and doesn’t show in active. The season is changing and the bar is well stocked.

Ok, so the next pub thread needs to mention that the bar is stocked with gin, honey topped toast, and fig rolls. Any other goodies we need to stock up on?

Hilariously, I am going to a wine tour and tasting in a couple of weeks. I don't drink wine. A friend from my home group in church has vouchers and invited me. I confessed that I don't drink wine because I've never matured my palate, but she's fab to spend time with, I love learning new things about processes, and who knows, the wine might taste nice.

Which of you is going to buy a small zoo, get a teaching qualification, and offer 1:1 animal care qualifications for DD2? CVs may be submitted by PM. Deadline was March 2026 🤣

I’ve hit the wall today too given in and phoned in sick to work. My bucket has just filled up too much struggling with the usual life demands plus a virus niggling at me and poor sleep with back pain. I hate letting people down but I was dreading today I’d done all the prep for a big work meeting but knew I’d get low level confrontation from mgrs and I can’t take it today. So I’m shuffling into the corner of the pub with my cuppa tea and packet of yummy gluten feee coop oat biscuits which i discovered last week in our local shop and scoofed the lot in one sitting. Honk honk to others shuffling along This Too Shall Pass… I hope .

So lovely to read @Tulipandmagnolia that DS is starting to show writting again, you must be so tentatively doing a mini happy dance inside when a chink of joy like this is very slowly emerging from the crystallist of trauma he’s been in.

Hang in there @RedRegular i hope the assignment makes it over the line. I’m SO torn over trying MS college again. That fear of watching DD2 tie herself inside out trying to fit in with a peer group yet at the same know I need to let her try but fear she’ll crash & burn without extra support in place.

Sorry @scoopofmintchocchipicecream that the erdm is not being offered.

Hope you have a better day today @drspouse it’s so hard when your energy bucket runs dry. Hope you can take some time over the long weekend to rest too.

Hope the horrid covid recedes soon @BlueandWhitePorcelain and hasn’t spoilt your post holiday memories. I’m hoping I haven’t got it too. It’s feeling like a low level version off it all week after I’d had a face to face work meeting last week. I always seem to pick something up when I’m away from home these days.

Thanks. DH has had it twice before and he says this time, it’s different. The first two times, he was wiped out for a few days and that was it. This time, we feel we are getting worse after 7/10 days - more exhausted. Still, I have lost 6 lbs, with the loss of appetite, and that’s despite trying to eat something at mealtimes! I did enjoy parts of the holiday, although I will always wear our N95 masks at airports and on planes in future!

@scoopofmintchocchipicecream - that is what I have seen DD2 experience with the mental health trust all over! DD2 has cPTSD - she needs trauma focused CBT or EMDR. They referred her to Talking Therapies for CBT. Talking Therapies assessed her and told her she was a strong candidate. Then they rejected her, without telling her. Eventually, the mental health trust told her, she was too complex for Talking Therapies - it’s for people under primary care! Why did they refer her then?

I hope you can find a private psychologist, who does EMDR.

If you are continuing to get worse @BlueandWhitePorcelain at the 7-10d plus point I’d check your oxygen levels with one of those finger monitors and that a secondary chest infection isn’t taking hold that needs antibiotics. Full on Covid did get worse at that point I remember. My relative develop bronchitis took weeks to improve. Take care and hopefully your energy will slowly return.

Thanks. Ironically, I’ve got to go for a chest x ray anyway. I fell over on my chest about 8 weeks ago. My GP sent me to A & E for a chest x ray. The doctor there told me, my lungs were ok, which was the main thing, and there were no misaligned fractures. The GP called me in for a face to face appointment, the night before I went to Greece to say the chest x ray showed a partially collapsed lung on the right, and what looked like a chest infection on the left! She wanted me to have another chest x ray, to check these things have cleared up!

I don’t know why A & E doctors bother to discuss x ray results, because the last three times for a member of our family, they’ve given us the wrong information!

@RedRegular hang in there! The end is in sight.

@FrostySunRun I missed the bit about your back. I hope it eases soon and your day off helps.

@BlueandWhitePorcelain imaging is formally reported on which is why sometimes you are called back. I’m surprised the GP thought you were fit to fly with a pneumothorax.

@Lougle that’s the one. Even if DD2 could cope with the journey, I think the other students would be too overwhelming for her.

I once considered setting up an AP. It was when we were looking for an AP for DS1 and couldn’t find one willing to work with DS1 even with his own 2:1 staff also attending. I quickly concluded it was far too much work to take on.

It would have been 12 sessions of EMDR on the NHS. I will probably try privately. Not yet though. Now isn’t brilliant timing. The next few months are busy with things for DC.

@scoopofmintchocchipicecream timing is important as you might feel very tired for yourself as well as normal levels of everyone else tired. Good luck.

@Lougle I don’t like gin other than the virtual pub vat. Going to a wine tasting as a non drinker will be interesting, I wonder if you will be better placed to detect all the tastes and smells because of it or if that comes from repetition. Have fun.

I don’t like gin other than the virtual pub vat.

I don’t really drink either, and if I do, I prefer a spirit with a mixer to wine.

@Lougle If it’s wine tasting, hopefully it will be a sip, rather than knocking a whole glass back every time?

I do drink alcohol but I like cocktails. All being well I’m going out with DH tomorrow and friends. I am beyond excited. It’s been a while since I fussed over what to wear etc. it’s a PIMMs venue so that suits me. The WLI have had an effect on my smoking, it’s gone from 5 a day to 1 or 2, I just don’t feel like smoking.

What on earth is the DfE advert about 😮.

I have a field but I’m not filling it with a zoo. Let’s drink gin and be lazy instead. I think I’m going to leave the EHC hanging. They don’t do much unprompted and then I can always resuscitate it when ds is actually well enough to attend. Every part of it would be better tackled at home without the agro. I’m going to pretend we’ve finished education and see what normal life is like.

Some other family members have jumped in to do some things I thought I would have to do, which is excellent because I’ve been juggling to many needs in too many locations.

I’m feeling totally illogically jolly.

@RedRegular the Gemma C advert? It’s so so disrespectful it defies words really I mean wtf were the DOE thinking. I ranted at DH about how utterly out touch the whole thing is 😔 hope you have a fab time out

Amazing win today that DD2 sang to me for the first time in a year. She has an amazing natural voice untrained but does play the piano too but was too anxious to sing in public. She’s been playing the Roblox singing game and really re-found her confidence again and keen to do more. So we’ve ordered microphone kit off Amazon for her computer so she can play around with it.

Ah a singer 😀. I’ve got a hummer. A big indication of wellbeing. Rhythm Heaven in Switch is a fun game (not singing but playing to a beat)

Bah humbug to your zoo refusal @Zeonlywayisup . Although, I think DD2 would find it a bit of trek every day, so I'll let you off.

@RedRegular I'm planning to do the whole swirl, sniff, swill thing with a considered look on my face. Fake it 'til you make it, right? @BlueandWhitePorcelain I think it's 3 x 75ml glasses of sparkling wine, which would be fine for most people but would see me under the table. So sipping it is. DH will drive us there and back.

@FrostySunRun I'm so pleased that your DD sang to you! How special.

I met with the HT of the school today and we had a productive chat about how the school strategic activity comes across as chaos to some parents, and that there needs to be better lines of communication. He did manage to rejig DD3's timetable significantly, and although he initially said he couldn't give her more time with her tutor, he suddenly sighed and said 'let's make dreams happen...' and managed to get her 3 lessons per week with him. He's also going to talk to the animal disrespecter and ask her to at least fake a respect for animals in DD3's presence.

I’m still not over Gemma Collins.

Thatched office quote just in and looks like its going to be more like £25k now so that may rule it out. Have to discuss with DH but not hopeful now. Have had another company recommended so maybe can look at them. Its been useful to think about things anyway but we need to be careful with money now. I didn't realise when they said £12k to £18k before that excluded vat and its come in at just above £18.6k plus 20% vat, plus shed removal, plus planning, plus electrics, plus light fittings plus we would need to paint if want painted outside. Was a nice dream. We could make it smaller and lower in height but its quite chunky beams inside and don't know if there would be that much price difference and would make ceiling height low in places though DS is almost always horizontal.

Lovely DD sang to you @FrostySunRun

Have a great time tomorrow @RedRegular Hope assignment is in soon.

I had another thought re DS writing and its a phrase we use for the cat Where's your staff cat? so maybe he likes the phrase.

Do I need to know who she is and what she's done?
At Scouts with DS and no DD as she's working off her debt. Told the Scout leader.
DS had a very short confusion earlier before his meds and as DD isn't here and I'm fairly sure he will be well, I'm hanging well back. They are playing rounders but I can't see if he's actually playing, though given the others are all messing about it would be hard to tell.

Is this an attempt at showing they're 'down with the kids?'

Reality tv star fronting a campaign for DoE. ‘Just turn up, concentrate and be fabulous’ some are cynical that it’s a smoke screen for education laws that are going through - no mention of those changes. I found it bizarre. If only turning up and being fabulous was the key to education for my child…

I can do fabulous.
I have to say, I've kind of avoided engaging with the SEND reforms which is probably very wrong of me but I don't see either the current system OR the proposed new one working for DS (because under both of them there are huge incentives for schools not to take him, and I don't see what they can do to stop that).
What we need is more schools for average to high ability but reactive children and nobody who doesn't have a child like that wants their child in a school like that. So even if all the other SEND parents got their wishes, we wouldn't.

The send reforms from what I can work out i
are essentially trying to remove the current legislation and remove your right to challenge legally via tribunal if you disagree with the schools individual education plan that will replace most of the EHCPs. Effectively stripping even more of the limited options you may have to advocate for your child’s education . Putting lots more kids into “resource bases” great if staffed properly but not if it’s just a TA and all the “noisy naughty “ kids sidelined out the classroom. Just my take on what I’ve seen. Personally DD2 will age out of the system before most of it impacts.