Good luck Claw!

[fightingtheLA]

Hi Claw
Have been following your sorry saga with school for a while now. Just wanted to say good luck with the meeting tomorrow and hope you get more from it than the usual clap-trap,fob-offs etc. etc. I find it difficult dealing with everything even with a very supportive school so am in awe of your tenacity. Knowledge is strength and posters such as yourself, Debs, Star,Attila etc..have really given me the confidence to fight for my ds!

DP is off work this week doing building work in the kitchen, so i can go and look round new school on my own.

I will keep him off tomorrow, he isnt feeling very well , make sure place is ok etc, then if he cant start until Sept, home ed until then. They told me to bring birth cert etc, so obviously plan to offer us the place if i want it. But i wont count my chickens.

That way school wont be attending and trying to fuck up his dx appointment on the 23rd either.

Yay. Sure Home ed, but don't do anything boring, - enjoy the summer and all the empty places that you might not normally be able to take him in the noisy busy holidays. I dunno, take him to a map museum or something He'll probably like the polyhedrons in the science museums too!? and playing undisturbed in the childrens learning zones at all these places.

Have a lovely time, mother and son, and catch up on any academic things during the holidays.

No way would I keep him at the old school with a guaranteed place at the other in Sept. I bet you anything that the LA won't come after you.

LOL map museum, you mean the underground! Nothing ds likes better than a map or a information board or an 'invitation board' as ds would say.

Do you know if LA provide anything for home ed or do you do your own thing? I plan to take it easy and have some fun, but wanted to do everything by the book.

He loves the science museum and London Aquarium. Ds actually enjoys maths books etc, he does these for fun! (my first child, who i havent had to nag to do any homework)

Attendance officer is ok. I have copied him into my letters to school and it is pretty obvious that i am reasonable, trying to help and offering suggestions. He forced the SENCO to phone me the other day, otherwise she would not have bothered.

Hmmm, you'll have to ask on the HE boards. I think officially you have to deregister, but this might cause a problem for his placement in September, so prolly the best way to do it is to go off with stress and anxiety or school refusing. They won't have organised themselves before the holidays to do anything about it, and won't be inclined to as he is starting again in Sept.

You prolly better off not doing it by the book in this instance but check it out.

And no, the LA won't provide you with anything. Your ds prolly costs them £300 to school from now until the end of term and they've already paid it, they're not gonna give you extra.

Oh this could get tricky, i want to tell school ds has left, so they cant come to the dx meeting on the 23rd, they really are set on playing down all his difficulties and that he doesnt need any help.

easy - see tomorrow if you have a definite place for ds. signhim up instantly if you like it (and get copies of the paperwork)

write, by emial tomorrow afternoon (with "hard copy to follow in post" marked) to say that school have failed in their duty of care, do not know their arse form their elbow, and you no longer have any confidence in their ability to look after your ds.

that, given all this, he will no longer be attending.

and write to LEA at the same time to tell them he has left XXXX school, and will be going to YYYY school from such and such a date.

Silver, really that easy! Thats that sorted then im feeling very liberated, i will be burning my bra next!

well, that's what we did

agree, very liberating - really hope it all goes well for you tomorrow.

obviously, for sake of good order, and good record keeping, list a few examples of how they have failed ot look after your ds, in both the email to the school, and the one to the LEA

Oh Claw, this has been a long time coming but I am almost as relieved as you.

You obviously don't want to be a pita parent at this new school, but do make it clear from the outset that you and them are in partnership in your ds' education and you would work your arse off to ensure that they have everything they need to do right by him, but that doing right by him is what you will be expecting.

claw, a new school sounds really positive. I'm not sure how much schools do things 'by the book' in your area, but my DS was off school for half a term whilst waiting for a new placement.

We didn't get any contact from EWO at all - slightly different circumstances but tbh I don't think they really cared what we were up to as long as we weren't asking for funding. It really was quite fun to go to museums etc during quiet times.

Can you ask the new school if you can do some visits before the end of term?

I have been putting together a Personal Portfolio for DS for when he starts a new school. Cerebra take your details and help you make a booklet with information about your child. You could do one for your DS to give to his teachers next term, to help them understand his history and needs.

I've been following your threads claw and I was thinking a new school was probably the best option,
when ds was 7 I withdrew him from a special unit as it was a nightmare culminating in a full week when I was phoned between 9.15 and 9.30 to collect him, on the final day I arrived to find him pinned down by 2 adults and another stood over him.I told them he wasn't coming back and was told he had to be in school and that I couldn't remove him all I said was watch me.By the time I drove home [5 minutes away] they had been on to education about me I fought to get him a proper place and he was sent to an EBD which wasn't ideal but the best of a bad job and the teachers and staff where fantastic in fact ds stated when he was told he was moving in p7 that he would cycle back his school was 18 miles away.We've never looked back since he has achieved things we never thought possible all down to people understanding his needs I hope you have the same sort of outcome for your ds.

Star my relationship with this school was doomed from the start. I spoke to SENCO prior to ds starting school, he had no IEP in place, i didnt have any knowledge of IEPS or SN's procedure.

So i phoned just to introduce myself, as ds was not even on SN register in nursery, but i suddenly found him there, he had been placed on SA plus automatically because of OT, SALT involvement. We spoke,i explained ds to her and i asked her advice.

She then recorded on file mum is a nuisance, very anxious and needs careful handling after one phone call

Despite not having any contact with her for 9 months and following her advice of 'lets just wait and see how he gets on' By September, it became clear he wasnt coping, i asked for help, they refused to communicate with me and stated i harass SENCO!

Sugar thanks for the link i will check it out.

Home visit at the moment might not be such a good idea, we are just rebuilding the kitchen, the house is a total mess. I have my new cooker sat here beside me in the front room and plastic sheeting hanging over doors etc!

Its reassuring to hear that didnt get any grief from the EWO. I dont think attendance officer will bother us, he is well aware of the situation.

Borderlass, its terrible isnt it, not being understood for me, let alone for ds. Some schools have a lot to answer for.

Glad to hear that your decision was the right one and that your ds did really well. I am feeling hopeful.

Thanks.

Thank you so much fighting for starting this thread, some real good has come from it

I'm glad I did Claw - I have got my lotto tickets for tonight too! Really pleased that things are looking so positive for you and your ds. Schools should not be allowed to treat any child like that. Perhaps we should have a Hall of Shame for all ths schools with awful uncaring HT's. Did this school have an outstanding Ofsted rating by chance like my ds's?

So glad things are looking up, Claw

claw3 how do you know they wrote that about you? How can SENCO say that after one phone call? (want to know as would love to see what they write about me).

I hassle the SENCO (and everyone else) every day...I call it my job and dont give a toss what anyone says about me as long as ds gets what he needs.

I'm moving ds again this year also as although school ok they are just to big/busy to spend time with ds...so sh*te really but not angry with them as they accepted ds...it was the school the year before that didnt accept ds I did the whole DDA, letter to gov etc...got me nowhere but was very theraputic to write and complain about the discrimitive filth that came out of HT mouth etc...

Fighting, yes it does have a good Ofsted, much better than the new school, but new school special needs is mentioned much more!

I was actually comparing Ofsted reports and found this on old school "The plan for improvement lacks quantifiable measures against which progress can be monitored and its impact evaluated" How apt!

Thank you Bigwee, its such a relief.

want2sleep When i recently applied for a copy of ds's school record, there was a log of the phone call from 2008! Exactly, after one phone call and the very first time i had ever contacted the school, the log of the conversation is just a pretty normal conversation, with her asking me questions about his behaviour etc. It also stated "despite OT telling Mrs Claw i would contact her in my own time, when i was ready, she phoned me" that first phone call just about sums the school up.

Im not angry with them for not understanding, im angry with them for trying to cover everything up and lying iyswim.

Good luck with your move

Good luck again for today Claw with the new school! I'm at work today so will catch up later but fingers crossed all goes well. Virtual bubbly is on ice!

Thank you Fighting, im so looking forward to it, only a few hours to go. Will report back. I have ds's birth cert in my bag already, so i cannot possibly forgot it!

Yeah, really hoping it works out for you!!

Well wow, wow and wow again at this school!

For starters, i had not mentioned special needs or autism, when i arranged to view the school as i didnt want to go in details with the school secretary.

However, she gave me a tour prior to appointment with Head. She showed me the chill out room for children with special needs and commented that although ds would not be using this room, she wanted to show me as they like to make parents and children aware of special needs!

I then told her that ds has special needs, she then went off to get SENCO! Had a chat with SENCO and told her about SA process, she asked if she could contact LA and said she would come into the meeting with Head if that was ok by me.

Meeting with Head, she knew exactly what i was talking about and could have finished my sentences for me! The whole school have had ASD training and been on courses etc. They have an ASD unit being built next year. They have a speech and language group 3 times a week for any child with speech difficulties on top of any 1:1 help they may receive. They have a lunchtime club for children with eating difficulties ie they are supervised by an adult. They have a chill out room, filled with beanbags and books etc.

They invited me and ds to visit tomorrow, so ds can look round and to bring his camera so he can take pictures.

I will provide copies of all reports etc then have a further meeting with SENCO to put a plan in place. They want ds to start school NOW, building up gradually, as September is too long for him to have to wait!

Im impressed