Primary school auties thread 9 - spring / summer 2022.

[danni0509]

Thread 9.

Links to previous threads below.

For the parents / carers of children with additional needs, most of us have asd / adhd children in primary school, but anybody is welcome to join us to chat x

Thread 1
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3080753-DS-with-ASD-starting-school-Sept-2018-I-am-feeling-overwhelmed

Thread 2
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3451020-Reception-auties-2018-19-thread-2

Thread 3
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3628263-Auties-transition-to-Year-1-thread-3

Thread 4
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3748449-Primary-school-Auties-into-2020-thread-4

Thread 5
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3953023-Primary-school-auties-summer-and-beyond-thread-5?pg=1

Thread 6
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/4166833-Primary-school-auties-spring-2021-and-beyond-thread-6?pg=1

Thread 7
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/4303826-Primary-school-auties-summer-and-the-new-academic-year-thread-7

Thread 8
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/4422100-Primary-school-auties-step-into-Christmas-and-the-New-Year-thread-8

dimples hope the forest school goes well.

carrie how was your day of juice only?

@openupmyeagereyes that dies sound stressful for your DS! @danni0509 sorry you're having issues too, it must be so hard in special school as most kids have inappropriate responses etc but you'd think they'd do something. DS kept getting on the nerves of this girl because she hated being touched and he kept hugging her, so then on the photos they send I noticed he was not near her for a few weeks!!
@dimples76 forest school sounds good.
What I find so hard is that DS struggles so much to even do things he likes sometimes, like anything perceived as a demand just wigs him out. So it takes trained staff who know him and know what to say (and what not) to keep him calm and engaged. Therefore even sen clubs I worry would say the wrong thing yo him and he'd get himself into a tizz. E.g. even saying ooh DS you'll enjoy this one, come on. So then all of a sudden there is a demand to enjoy something and he rails against it. I watched a talk by Harry Thompson about it and it was so interesting, so similar to how DS behaves, but it's so hard to explain it to people! Even the taxi driver this morning said come on DS, mums going to be late, and I cringed inside because it of course led to a few mins of messing about before I promised a star on his chat if he just got on with it. Then he said say bye DS, like please don't, it doesn't matter to me of he says it or not!!
Anyway. How are the juices @carriebradshawwithlessshoes? I'm intrigued!!

If anyone offers me a juice I will not be responsible for my actions today 😡😡😡😡!

Hmm… 5 x 250 mls, all different. Nothing wrong with the juices as such, just more that they were accompanied by no food! Some were quite tangy some like a j2 0!! The whole experience was made worse by having to cook a lovely tea for the kids and DH…! That all said we have a couple of senior Drs in our family and they are v in favour of intermittent fasting for health reasons also not just weight loss and I’ve bought a months supply of this so will see. I have found weight creeping on over the years and WFH hasn’t helped! I’ve never been a big exerciser but at least pre Covid had to trek across a city for lunch, to park the car etc. Suppose it all adds up!

I’ll keep you posted… Susan in my minds eye I see you as a very slim, sporty person who has no need for the juices! I may be wrong with that, maybe gleaned from things you have said in the past! I was laughing with Danni the other day saying how when we chat so much you tend to imagine what we are like in RL! Prob completely wrong!!

Anyway latte today and food! Hoorah!!!!!!

Ha @carriebradshawwithlessshoes no I am 5 foot size 14 with a sizeable bust, more Barbara Windsor than sporty slim! The irony was that mu.milk never came in so I couldn't even breastfeed DS (well also he wouldn't do it)! I'm tempted by the juices but I love food too much I think. I tried going vegan once...lasted 36 hours including sleep!🤣🤣

Ha ha, I had you down as a Kylie Minogue! 🤣🤣. I’m v envious though, been a bra A cup all my life save for when I was pregnant and went up to a B (then back again!!). I’m a classic pear.

I could not be vegan or veggie. I love fish, seafood, cheese and a good cut of meat far too much. That would be a no.

I have a picture of what you all look like in my minds eye too! 😂 if I type your name on here, the exact picture comes to mind. Weird!

If we met we would be like , who are you?? That’s not right! 🤣🤣

susan I do exactly the same, I get irritated with people saying the wrong thing (it happens often) it’s not them I should be irritated by, but it does piss me off because it’s me that deals with the fall out of what they’ve said to ds.

Yes that’s exactly it carrie

I’m 5ft and fat and wear glasses. But I’m going to the gym regularly now, so change your minds eye picture to Kim Kardashian! 😂🤣

🤣🤣🤣🤣. Likewise, for me (post juices) Amal Clooney….

Pre juices… hmm…. Lorraine Kelly?? 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Loving all these mental images of you!

carrie juice fasting is quite hard core. The 5:2 cookbook has some good recipes in it if you fancy adding some food on some days. Ultimately I found 5:2 quite difficult and find the 16:8 easier to follow. I count down the time to my latte at 10ish though.

Thanks open!! Currently in desperate times tho… 🤣🤣🤣

I still haven't got back on the fasting wagon. My clothes are all too tight so really need to get this sorted.

I don't have images of you in my mind. However, I think if I met you all that I would be able to identify who was who - in reality I am sure that I would get it totally wrong! If I was describing myself nicely I would say that I am curvy and I do have dimples.

My problem which is why I’m doing these juices is I’m an all or nothing person.. no biscuits or the packet, no wine or the bottle. People who can eat one finger of Kit Kat or twix perplex and confuse me no end! I can’t even eat one polo ffs… I have to eat the packet!

carrie it's a common struggle!

@danni0509

His teacher always says ds presses all the kids buttons tho, like that’s an acceptable excuse for ds getting battered.

It’s not, and I’m not happy. I hate him getting hurt, I don’t like him hurting others either. But black eyes and swollen bruised fingers and nip mark scars on his arm and being chased by 16 year olds is going a bit too far.

Sorry, I tend to lurk in here more than post as I am finding things so tough but this struck a chord

I recently had a lot of grief from various professionals because DS got badly bit by DD. DS had spent hours antagonising her. Before I even finished what I was going to say next I got grief that it isn't acceptable to attempt to justify violence as deserved

Sorry you’re finding things tough mum

How are things? How is dd getting on at school now a days?

How can the professionals give you grief. You can only split yourself so far to stop each child getting hurt. I wouldn’t let them get to you and perhaps they should try and do the job of looking after 2 together with additional needs because I’m certain they wouldn’t give you grief then!

I don’t complain to school, I’m still not happy ds gets hurt. But I understand they all have needs in his class and the staff can only stop it so much, plus ds is just as likely to do something awful in return. So I feel hypocritical to complain about ds injuries when I know for a fact he’ll be causing them back.

Ds set the fire alarm off today, he said to me, ‘mummy it wasn’t a practise, I smashed the button!’ ffs. They had to tape them up at his old school. 🤣

Hi all, just catching up - hope everyone is doing OK and not suffering too much from juices or early starts... I think I might be about to join a gym which I haven't done for over a decade but I'm getting really stiff and graunchy and need to do something to try to slow the decay of middle age! I've really noticed it since 45, but put it down to the pandemic depriving me of my walks to start with.

@Mumofsend surely there is a difference between understanding triggers and justifying violence? But then you see all the excitement about the Will Smith thing and I think it's something a lot of people struggle with! Still, you'd think professionals in this area would know better.

@carriebradshawwithlessshoes your SS visit sounded great, and I'm really glad that it put DH's mind at rest. It's so hard when OH has a different view on things (not that it's not often valuable but it's still stressful when we don't see things the same way, even if it probably ends up in more thought through decisions in the end to have had those debates IYSWIM).

@danni0509 glad you got an answer in the end about the e-mail, though you would think the office still would have replied to you and explained that his teacher was also away, and wished DS a speedy recovery. With DS getting attacked: I get it is hard, but if they have somebody with him all the time surely at least they should be informing you about the incidents? Anything like that and our kids get sent to the school nurse and we get either an e-mail or sometimes asked to sign an accident book after school to evidence that we've been made aware of the incident.

DS's card sounds lovely though, and that he had been missing you at school!

@SusanStoHelitsPoker how is your cat doing now? I saw the message about going to the vet - sorry if I missed something after that. And has the York holiday already happened or still coming? We have a great friend in York so go most years and I really love it there.

@openupmyeagereyes what a shame about the head butting incident, especially when DS had managed so well to spend some extra time.

We are all good. DD's show and tell went well and she's agreed to give it to Year 4 today, which really surprised me as usually she gets really anxious about any type of performance (or usually actually just refuses). Breaking up on Friday lunchtime too, though DC are in a holiday club next week. I need to sort out some activities for the rest of the hols... that's today's job I think.

Oh mum that is rubbish as you were only providing the context for the incident.

Well done to your DD Light.

Got EEG results today and epilepsy diagnosis was confirmed. The consultant said that the results were absolutely typical of absence seizures. DS often deviates from medics expectations and I was worried that they would say that something was happening but it was unclear what or how to treat it. So a relief in some ways and I am getting the medication tomorrow.

That’s good dimples. Made the world of difference for my friends boy who was same age as your DS and had daily absences too. He hasnt had one since.

Well done to your dd Light. I seem to remember in reception she was really shy about saying her line in the Christmas play? What growth.

dimples hope the meds control the seizures.

Ds has woken up a bit highly strung today. Bodes well…

Well done to @LightTripper's DD, sounds amazing!
And what a relief in a way @dimples76, excellent that you now have access to the meds.
@openupmyeagereyes hopefully just a first thing in the morning type thing!
Cat is OK, plodding on throughout. Booked him in for the tests so we will see what the results show. It might just be something like arthritis they think, although they did find a stomach growth so. DH is ignoring it all and going on about how well the cat looks. So I'm the bad guy for mentioning the c word. I want to get these tests results and see what the next steps are.