Primary school auties: summer and the new academic year - thread 7

[openupmyeagereyes]

New thread.

This is the continuation of the thread for parents / carers of autistic children / children with additional needs. Most of us are parents of children in year 1 / year 2.

Links to old threads

Thread 1 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3080753-DS-with-ASD-starting-school-Sept-2018-I-am-feeling-overwhelmed

Thread 2 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3451020-Reception-auties-2018-19-thread-2

Thread 3 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3628263-Auties-transition-to-Year-1-thread-3

Thread 4 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3748449-Primary-school-Auties-into-2020-thread-4

Thread 5 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3953023-Primary-school-auties-summer-and-beyond-thread-5?pg=1

Thread 6 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/4166833-Primary-school-auties-spring-2021-and-beyond-thread-6?pg=1

That's great news about the school Carrie got everything crossed for you!

I LOVED the song of Achilles so much Magrat and her second book Circe. I love reading but I've gone through a bit of a lull in the last couple of months so more recommendations would be welcome here.

Danni what a nightmare that school is!!! So frustrating for you. I'm glad you have CAMHS on your side. I hide melatonin and vitamin d in ds's milk every night! Please don't let their bad attitude get to you, you are doing all the right things!

Well done for getting him in open. Mondays are always tricky here too!

Light's hit the nail on the head about being deceitful.

I'm not sure how this book passed me by. I think I'll get it on audio as I have some credits to use up.

Achilles is not very likeable in the Iliad and if I remember rightly, Patroclus is killed so I'm interested to see her take on it. Excited.

Yes it's a very interesting take on it @openupmyeagereyes!

Oh Danni shame on the school. I hope that you can find a better option

Please can I join the bookshop/cafe? I love Jane Austen. In fact one of my daydreams is that I complete her abandoned novel, the Watsons to international acclaim, allowing me to ditch the day job (I am an academic, formerly a lawyer). I like P&P and Persuasion the best. I mostly read crime novels now but my Mum has just passed on Longbourn to me (novel re below stairs P & P).

We had a v busy weekend with my sister and family staying including Christmas Dinner yesterday - it was actually probably better than the real thing as it was more relaxed. We then all watched the Boy named Christmas together - well actually DS and DD both fell asleep on me. It was great at the time but DS is exhausted now - he just drifted on to the road on the way home in a daydream.

dimples what an awesome daydream. I never have such fun ones. Your weekend sounds lovely. I can’t imagine ds falling asleep on me watching a film anymore.

@dimples76 Longborne is amazing as is Miss Austen.

Camhs sent ds school a consent letter yesterday to say yes it can be crushed and added to food or drink, they scanned it over to school so it got there quickly, as verbal consent from the adhd nurse wasn’t enough apparently. Anyway I’m pleased camhs were helpful (can’t fault them)

Ds headteacher emailed me last night to say thanks for chasing the letter and they have now received it but now they need to order a tablet crusher because 2 teaspoons (I use) isn’t appropriate. Well it’s appropriate for me, it works perfectly..

One thing after another….

I do think camhs were a bit funny with them because she justified twice on her email why she needed the letter. Also wrote that they really want to help and support ds.

I sent my mum the email and my mum messaged back, she’s been bollocked.

Anyway I do understand in a way they have to be careful, but camhs said they have never had a school ask for this information and it needing to be sent by letter. Just ds school..

I know ds isn’t the only one it has to be crushed for, I got the idea from on here!!

Honestly I think most children struggle with whole tablets. I don't know what their issue is. I wonder if it would be worth getting a tablet crusher in a pharmacy (assuming they do them) and sending it in with DS just so that they can't claim a long wait for delivery?? I mean, I have no idea why they would want to - but they do seem determined to make everybody's lives difficult...

Well they've been told haven't they. Shame they couldn't just listen, I'm sure CAMHS have plenty to do. How were things today danni?

Ds refused to go in to school this morning. Of course he did because I tried to make plans but had to cancel again. Have felt quite sorry for myself today but it's pointless. Tomorrow someone from the new school is going in to see him at school - 50/50 whether he'll be there but they can talk to the staff anyway.

Oh and I'm loving the song of Achilles. It's beautifully written.

Do you have family Open that you could ask to come to yours to stay with him whilst you arrange something? Much as they drive me mad at times I don’t know what I’d do if parents snd PIL didn’t have DS sometimes….

Ds had his smoothie at school today, school didn’t tell me, I asked the taxi and they said yes they said he had it no problem.

Imagine I had not of checked then gave him a dose when he got in as I have been doing. Wtf. Im pleased he had it though.

He’s not had a very good morning apparently, hitting the girl who usually hits him. He’s made her cry, not being petty but if she can dish it out then she’s got to take it back. I don’t particularly like kids hitting ds but I have said I can’t be a hypocrite if he hits them he’s got to expect a few back…

She hits him every day. She threw a book at his head last week, kicks him nearly every day of the week, she’s thrown a drum at him, bruised his chest. Had to have the teachers drag her off ds a couple of times now. His teacher has said to me a few times it’s a bit of a problem her hitting him when he goes in her personal space. (Which I think is ridiculous, he’s hardly committing a crime getting too close to her)

Ds keeps saying to me if xxxx hits me again I’m going to chop her head off. 😳 and this morning he’s hit her and hurt her. Not condoning his behaviour of course but why should he keep getting battered and do nothing back.

I said to the taxi they don’t want to be ringing me and complaining as I’ll tell them it’s just deserts!

I’m not in the camp of telling ds to hit back because I have spent too long telling him not to. I just tell him to tell the teacher. But if he’s going to do it off his own back because he’s sick of it then good for him.

I had the school nurse ring me today, ds refused the flu spray about 3 weeks ago (he always does) they’ve gone in today to do the catch up programme and ds teacher said no ds won’t have it, we aren’t bringing him down it sets his anxious behaviour off and he plays up so we will leave it until next year, the nurse said, it’s his mums decision. School haven’t been in touch or asked me if that’s ok, so she’s phoned me to let me know. I said no they haven’t mentioned it, but that’s fine for him to miss it I don’t force him as he really doesn’t tolerate anything medical so if I can get away with it I don’t make him, but she’s annoyed they didn’t consult me first and have made a decision based on them having to deal with him after stressing him out trying.

They seem to be pissing everyone off at the minute 😂

Hopefully he’ll go in tomorrow open.

Is it soon he starts?

Don’t you have to consent to the flu spray in the first instance? I thought if you said no or said nothing they didn’t even try. Loads at school don’t have it cos parents don’t consent.

I did consent Carrie, couple of months ago they sent me a thing to fill out online, I always consent knowing he probably won’t have it, but incase on the slim chance he accepts it.. few weeks ago they went in to his school and tried and he refused, he was crying and his teacher said to me his behaviour was heightened for the rest of that morning.

They’ve gone back in today to do the kids that missed it and when they sent for ds to try again ds teacher has just outright said no not even bringing him down it’s not worth it kind of thing. But the nurse said that’s not their decision it’s mine and they should of spoken to me first. But they didn’t. They just said no not bringing him and that’s what the nurse was annoyed at.

I’m not fussed either way whether he has it or not to be fair. Me and Dh have the flu jab so less likely to bring it home to him.

I wasn’t aware the nursing team were even going back in today. First I knew was when she rang today, she was just wondering if the school had rung me to discuss it and I said no. Then she said that’s not very good practise.

Ah I see!!! I generally say no re DS as I can’t face the pain!!! That said he’s a blood test tmrw. I’ve a bottle of gin ready for when I get back 😱😱😱🤣🤣🤣

Maybe you should give it to ds, might make it a bit easier to get through the appointment 🤣🤣

He would drink it too, he’s v adventurous when it comes to food and drink (too much so….!)

Hopefully he may surprise you, Carrie. DS had a blood test earlier in the year and was a real angel.

Danni, I agree with the nurse, they should have checked with you.

Open good luck with getting him in.

Today was going really well, including a fab OT session. Bit embarrassing in some ways but I find it easier when someone directs me how to play with DS. We had a good giggle together. When I collected DS for the appointment I bumped into the SENCO who said that DS's EHCP is going to panel on Friday and it looks like OT provision will be included. Then on the way home had a call from nursery. DD has a cough and raised temp. Here we go again!

Oh no dimples! Hopefully it’s not covid.

carrie I’m going to ask my mum to come and watch him while I try and have a Christmassy morning with another friend.

Glad to hear that open, we all need a bit of a break sometimes (from all kids!!). Enjoy!

Hope DD is ok dimples, both mine are ill plus DH (worse than a million sick children 😡). Too many bugs!!!

Ds went in today, he needed a bit of persuasion at the other end.

I hope poorly children (and adults) are all better soon.

Dimples can I be nosey and ask what the OT did with DS which was so good?? I do feel our OT is pretty useless. She supposedly introduced a sensory diet at school which has had no impact and beyond that…I’m not wholly sure what she does. She’s never let me in the room when she’s working with him but I’ve certainly not seen any massive benefits for her £80 a session fee…

🤢🤢🤢 this morning, both kids eating advent calendar chocs before I had got out of bed. I’m a chocoholic more than most but my stomach was churning at that time…!!