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Primary school auties: summer and the new academic year - thread 7

999 replies

openupmyeagereyes · 23/07/2021 04:25

New thread.

This is the continuation of the thread for parents / carers of autistic children / children with additional needs. Most of us are parents of children in year 1 / year 2.

Links to old threads

Thread 1 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3080753-DS-with-ASD-starting-school-Sept-2018-I-am-feeling-overwhelmed

Thread 2 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3451020-Reception-auties-2018-19-thread-2

Thread 3 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3628263-Auties-transition-to-Year-1-thread-3

Thread 4 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3748449-Primary-school-Auties-into-2020-thread-4

Thread 5 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3953023-Primary-school-auties-summer-and-beyond-thread-5?pg=1

Thread 6 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/4166833-Primary-school-auties-spring-2021-and-beyond-thread-6?pg=1

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openupmyeagereyes · 23/07/2021 04:40

Forgot to add in the OP that everyone is welcome.

carrie ds zones out sometimes too. I’ve never timed it but I don’t think it’s anything to worry about. If your ds has epilepsy though it’s good you’re getting it checked out incase his meds need changing.

I’m taking ds swimming this afternoon, first time since Covid hit. Day 1 of operation holiday: keep ds busy. I’ve talked with him about learning to swim so I’m hoping he’ll start to follow some directions for a while as well as just playing.

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dimples76 · 23/07/2021 07:31

Thanks for starting a new thread Open.

DS never follows my instructions in the pool. He mostly just likes jumping in. My Mum has a giant paddling pool/mini swimming pool and this month DS has taken his swum across it underwater - first time swimming without aids. We're going swimming on Sunday so it will be interesting to see what he does

DD's test came back negative at 2am so we're out of isolation -phew!

livpotter · 23/07/2021 07:35

Thanks for the new thread open!

Brilliant the test was negative dimples. And amazing ds can swim like that!

I haven't taken the kids swimming for a long time. The last time we went ds refused to even go in the changing room, I think it was all a bit much for him.

Last day of term here! Can't believe it going to be the summer holidays. This year has gone fast and slow. I'm really hoping for a less disruptive school year next year.

danni0509 · 23/07/2021 08:05

Thread 7 already! That last one filled up so fast.

Well done mini dimples for swimming. I still need to get ds booked onto some lessons of some sort.

Well ds woke at 6.45am, so he had 11 hours sleep last night which is so rare and so appreciated!

openupmyeagereyes · 23/07/2021 08:28

dimples hooray for -ve tests and swimming.

liv enjoy the last day before the hols.

danni 11 hours! That’s amazing It will be interesting to see if he’s any different today.

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carriebradshawwithlessshoes · 23/07/2021 09:36

Thanks open for the thread.

Woo hoo Danni!!!!!

I also took DS swimming yesterday but there was a bit of a cock up, it was a new venue and when I got there the big pool was adults only and so we were directed to the toddler one which came up to my knees and DSs waist when standing up… so not much swimming…. Anyway it was alright….!!!

openupmyeagereyes · 23/07/2021 19:03

Swimming was good. Ds followed the rules and we did a bit of floating, kicking and bubble blowing. I’m going to book again for next week.

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openupmyeagereyes · 23/07/2021 20:12

danni is ds asleep? Still awake here. He’s knackered but loves to fight it off!

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danni0509 · 24/07/2021 12:08

Sorry open i didn’t come on last night, he was asleep for 8.30 last night so that was ok, I like him asleep before 9 then my night doesn’t feel so wasted. He was up early though.

openupmyeagereyes · 24/07/2021 14:01

Not bad then danni. Ds fell asleep at 8:15, up at 4:30 but dh’s turn to get up.

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MagratGarlikInDisguise · 27/07/2021 09:10

Hi all! On holiday at the moment but place marking and I'll try to catch up soon! Having a fab time so far. DS scared of smoke alarm in bedroom to start with so first couple of nights were a bit rocky! He had a huge ice cream thing yesterday in this restaurant though so he was very happy! We are letting him just stay up with us etc for now. We are moving to the next holiday house today.
Wow @danni0509 well done on the sleep!!
Hope everyone else is OK.

LightTripper · 27/07/2021 10:32

Yay new thread!

That's great news on the sleep @danni0509! Keeping everything crossed that this turns out to be a good routine for DS.

We had a weekend away with DD's friend and her family which was great. Back to reality today. We're off for our proper holiday in 2 weeks. Same place as last year and the kids loved it, so looking forward to that, Covid permitting.

openupmyeagereyes · 27/07/2021 14:58

Glad' holidays are going well for people. We are away in a few weeks.

Had a lovely morning at a local country park with a friend of ds'. He also made friends with a girl which was nice as they played a little bit too. He's pretty exhausted now so a quiet afternoon at home planned here.

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carriebradshawwithlessshoes · 27/07/2021 15:21

On a farm in the Dales. Ds having fun. I hate farms give me the pool any day!

Unfortunately Ds jumping around and arm flapping, people are staring. Anyone’s DC do this?? When excited or otherwise? Can usually get by without drawing attention to ourselves but not today. Just wish he could talk to me like every other child here…

danni0509 · 27/07/2021 18:01

Hi all. Sorry for the silence (which is probably appreciated) Grin we are in York.

Thank the lord I’m home tomorrow morning. Stressful.

Sorry for ignoring your earlier post Carrie it’s just reminded me writing this actually that I didn’t reply back to you, I would of loved to have gone for cocktails / cup of tea / anything for some time away, but seems your away yourself, and to be truthfully honest, this is embarrassing, but Dh cannot be left with ds. He can’t cope with him alone. I barely cope myself, but Dh definitely doesn’t. Ds absolutely terrorises him.

The sleep thing, worked for 2 nights, more of a fluke if anything, he’s been worse this week than any other week, he was awake until 1 this morning and woke up at 5.15am WTAF.

As for people staring, every single day!

I started on some teenagers this afternoon outside of cooplands, I would of got arrested if Dh didn’t come out when he did 😂 Dh went in to buy ds some cheese straws (about the only thing he’s eating at the minute) and a group of little bastards were nudging each other and laughing at ds making noises and one was mocking him flapping his hands. I said do you think it’s funny to laugh at an autistic child? I’d rather be autistic than an ugly fuck. One said we weren’t laughing at him.

Yes yes you were! (I would genuinely only say something if I was 100% sure) they see ds making noises and flapping and he was pressing his face up against the window and kids definitely old enough to know better we’re taking the piss out of him. I watched one mock him flapping their own hands, who even does that?

danni0509 · 27/07/2021 18:02

Unfortunately ds sticks out like a sore thumb so we always get plenty of unwanted attention.

danni0509 · 27/07/2021 18:05

Dh bought ds a counter, not sure what it’s called exactly, but you press it and it adds a count on.

Well ds is sat by the hotel window watching cars go by and clicking it every time one drives past so he’s sitting occupied for a few mins at least, I’ve told him to see if he can count 1000 cars Grin x

openupmyeagereyes · 27/07/2021 19:20

carrie I think you just have to develop a thick skin / [hard stare] serene expression. It’s not easy sometimes. Ds doesn’t jump and flap, he tends to sort of run and move his arms in a kind of expressive dance manner from time to time.

danni sorry for thoughtless teenagers and rubbish sleep. I hope you enjoy your last evening.

On the bedtime countdown… my turn tonight

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carriebradshawwithlessshoes · 27/07/2021 19:55

Open you are right. Tbf he doesn’t do it all the time we are just going through a spell at the moment. My view is it’s linked to the biomed stuff… he takes some newish supplements which aim to clear brain fog/ give clearer cognition and so on but sometimes I do find they can be rather over stimulating. It’s hard to know how he will react unless we try but I do find some things can make him quite jittery. We have had some really clear words this last week but this is the downside.

Danni, first don’t be daft!! I’ll get you for cocktails one day 🤣. And no need at all to explain about DH… my DH is useless with DS too (and DD!!! He’s just generally hopeless with kids!!). So I do by far the lions share! Dh moans like crazy if I leave DS with him!

Sorry about your experience with the kids. People should be ashamed of themselves. Hope it’s not spoiled your break.

I think the clicker is genius by the way you can use it for all sorts! It’s fun and educational, that’s a great one.

Re the sleep, I know this isn’t what others recommend but is it worth a try? Your call of course just what works for DS. Melatonin absolutely no earlier than 8.20. Low stimulants but bed no earlier than 9.15. Yes it’s shit having no evening but it’s the only thing that gets him to sleep til a reasonable time (7.30). I absolutely don’t know why and it makes no sense but bed at 8 just triggers wake ups at 2.

Just re read your post that may not help at all if he’s fighting sleep, just what we do.

Still at home btw.. we live 15 mins from the Yorkshire dales so head out there all the time X

carriebradshawwithlessshoes · 27/07/2021 20:23

Ps perhaps sleep was rubbish because you were away?? I don’t think any of us sleep well when away and whilst today’s been better I can categorically say that in Yorkshire yesterday again it was too bloody hot!!! Stifling last night !

MagratGarlikInDisguise · 27/07/2021 20:43

New holiday house tonight so DS a bit eek but this one has a bath so he's happy he's clean at least!!
Yes @carriebradshawwithlessshoes DS flaps etc when excited. He's obviously different to other kids and struggles with social interaction. I just take no notice and enjoy DS for who he is. If people are mean, then I'd call them out like @danni0509 had to. People can be not nice but often it's an educational experience! DH struggles with DS too at times.
We are currently on this peninsula in the middle of nowhere in a farm house guest house. The sun never sets and it is wonderful. DS is just happy there is finally a TV!

openupmyeagereyes · 28/07/2021 06:35

Magrat that sounds lovely, are you in Scandinavia?

The last three nights ds has been asleep at 8 and hasn’t come downstairs. Hoping we’ve turned a corner after the last couple of weeks 🤞

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carriebradshawwithlessshoes · 28/07/2021 08:58

Fingers crossed open… you don’t think it’s because he’s more chilled now they have finished school? Ds is so much more relaxed. I do wonder why I bother sometimes… shall we just all home school?! 🤣🤣

Sounds beautiful Magrat, enjoy!

openupmyeagereyes · 29/07/2021 10:39

carrie possibly, though he’s still waking at 4. I don’t think either of us are missing the stress of trying to get to school.

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danni0509 · 30/07/2021 17:54

open have you tried a Lycra bedsheet for ds?

Busy Blanket Sensory Bed Sheet for Kids | Alternative to Heavy Weighted Blankets | Stretchy, Breathable, Firm Pressure for Calming & Relaxing Sleep | Royal Navy (Twin) www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B07VGM96BF/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_2YPC2HEDGNFW890254BE?psc=1&_encoding=UTF8&tag=mumsnetforu03-21

I’ve just ordered ds one of those, I’ve had to get him another weighted blanket aswell as the one I bought is far too heavy. He doesn’t like it so I’ve ordered a 2.2kg one. The one I’ve just got though was only £19.99 and is washable so much cheaper than the last weighted blanket we had.