Primary school Auties: into 2020! - thread 4

[LightTripper]

This is the continuation of the thread for parents and carers of autistic children in Early Years and KS1. Most of us are parents of children in Reception or Year 1, but all welcome!

Here are the links to the previous threads:

Thread 1: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3080753-DS-with-ASD-starting-school-Sept-2018-I-am-feeling-overwhelmed

Thread 2: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3451020-Reception-auties-2018-19-thread-2

Thread 3: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3628263-Auties-transition-to-Year-1-thread-3

Hope that you've all had good days. We had a street party (staying on our own drives). It almost felt like normal. My next door neighbour told DS he could draw a rainbow on her drive too and he did some random squiggles - feel like I need to go out under cover of darkness and sort it out!
DS actually got in to creating decorations with me - so rare!

After all this excitement we are all exhausted. DD in bed and DS running around manically.
Excellent news re the writing Lottie. Thanks for those other ideas Open
Think I may need to leave the class parents WhatsApp group - people were complaining that the English work (that DS finds impossible) was too easy. Too depressing

No street party here. Sounds like fun though and some stealth drawing for ds! Did you decide to leave the WhatsApp group? It can get you down when you see what some of the other kids are able to do but I do find our WhatsApp group useful overall.

Another meltdown about the iPad here this afternoon but he has been outside to bounce on the trampoline a few times. I know it’s all super hard for him and overall he’s doing really well so we’ve just got to keep trying to balance it all.

Open I decided to mute notifications for the WhatsApp group as a compromise - it is often useful but also sometimes depressing.

DS has spent most of the day watching telly and resisted all my efforts to get him outside.

dimples a good compromise.

I hope both dc sleep well tonight. Touch wood Ds has slept pretty solidly for a while, bar a couple of nights. Usually up by 5 but we’re used to that and have had worse.

Ds has started asking lots of why questions: why do we have arms and legs, why are there planets, why do we have lights... it’s great to see him come on this way. He didn’t ask his first proper question until he was 3.5 - what’s that? He worked through all of the w questions with why being the last. Apparently that’s the most difficult one.

This is the document providing info for schools on reopening in June:

www.gov.uk/government/publications/actions-for-educational-and-childcare-settings-to-prepare-for-wider-opening-from-1-june-2020/actions-for-education-and-childcare-settings-to-prepare-for-wider-opening-from-1-june-2020

That seems pretty confusing. They seem to be saying they recognise that YR and Y1 cannot be expected to social distance: but then also suggesting that they should be kept 2m apart by having smaller class sizes (some led by TAs if necessary) and keeping closer contact short (in corridors etc). But presumably they are still going to have breaks/playtime/lunchtime? So realistically if our age kids go back they will be mixing to an extent. Maybe they could stagger playtimes to limit the numbers a bit, but you're talking about e.g. halving the contacts, not limiting it to accidental contact.

I suspect they have run the numbers on the assumption that they will all mix and spread it to each other, and that they think by sending back limited numbers of kids they can keep R below 1 despite that: but I wish they'd just be transparent if that is the case and say that is the plan.

As it stands it seems to be putting a huge onus on schools to keep everyone "safe" but not providing the wherewithall to actually do that ... puts schools in a really hard position.

I agree that it seems to put schools in an impossible position. I also didn't realise until I read that, that they were hoping to have all primary back this school year.

I would have thought with staffing and distancing issues part time attendance would be more practical.

My sister is a primary teacher in Australia and she said that in WA that after initially announcing that primary schools would be socially distant they abandoned the plan as unworkable. When I saw a Danish school on the news it looked like at breaktime all the social distancing was abandoned.
I guess we'll just need to see what happens over the next couple of weeks

Yes, the next few weeks will be key. Head teachers will be scrambling trying to make this workable for their particular school.

Unions are very unhappy though. I saw in a Sky News article that 85% of 49k teachers surveyed were unhappy with schools opening then. We may get strikes.

Or that may have been responders. People might be more willing to respond if they have very strong views?

Based on our class WhatsApp this morning at least a third of the dc will be kept off anyway.

www.gov.uk/government/publications/coronavirus-covid-19-implementing-protective-measures-in-education-and-childcare-settings/coronavirus-covid-19-implementing-protective-measures-in-education-and-childcare-settings

Open I think it will be less than half attending my son's school based on the WhatsApp group.

School did a survey of parents today about 1 June and I opted for undecided.

We have a survey to complete too dimples. The head’s email implies they will be trying to implement more social distancing than the government’s document specifies (though I could be wrong). They have said classes will need to be 6-9 children at a time, ds’ class is 30.

We haven’t submitted ours yet but I have said it will depend on all the factors at the time, including what the schools decide to do.

Ds has had a tricky day with several emotional outbursts and aggression. No work done but he did read a book with me. A few of the other children are struggling emotionally too.

We have our first all class zoom session tomorrow. I do not expect ds to participate much as he can find these things very strange when he’s not used to the context.

DS has been rather difficult today - swaying me towards sending him in! A lot of shouting & screaming and weeing every where. I'm grateful that they are both sleeping peacefully now and I'm planning an early night to help recharge my batteries.

Wishing you a peaceful one.

I hope everyone is doing ok. Our zoom call went quite well in the end. Ds was quite excited and sat through half of it before getting bored and going off to play for a while

I didn’t think he was going to do it, he was still in his pants five minutes before it started.

We have managed some work the last two afternoons. I am reading Calmer, easier, happier homework for tips.

I'm v impressed that he made it half way through Open.

So glad that it's the weekend - now I just need to persuade DS to spend more time outside ....

We managed 30 mins in the garden this morning. Will try for more later.

Ds had a horrible tantrum yesterday morning with hitting, kicking, scratching and hair pulling which was new. Later in the morning I took him out for our first walk since lockdown. I thought it might do him some good to start getting out. He was very good thankfully and we didn’t go very far.

I’ve no idea if this aggression is a result of lockdown or just a phase. I was quite down yesterday, worrying about what it meant for the future and school. Feeling better today though.

Well done to your DS @openupmyeagereyes for staying for half the webinar. My DS is terrified of them for some reason and won't do them so I'm not pushing it for now...especially as his default thing to do when he doesnt want to do something is act out rather than just tell us. We are working on that now and the other day, when we were doing handwriting practice, he said he was fed up and could we do something else. Previously, he would have just deliberately scribbled all over it or something so I'm glad he's using his words more to tell us stuff. It's challenging for me not getting angry at the outbursts but asking him what that was all about instead,but it pays off I think...!
DS loves the garden but hares the wind! I do find that if he doesnt have any outdoor time his sensory stuff is much higher (spinning, smushing into.people, hanging off the sofa etc) so we got out each day.
@dimples76 wishing you some peace!
Our new special interest is in the earth and the environment, which I'm finding slightly more interesting than trains!
It's the social side of school that DS is missing, and that he needs, now (and his supported peer play time) but I'm not sending him back until it is safe!

Sorry I didnt mean that to come across as preachy, I'm just quite anxious about the schools going back!

Lottie I think not liking the wind is quite common in autistic children.

Earth and environment sounds promising, lots of stealth home learning possibilities there should you wish.

Ds has been calm since Friday’s episode. He was awake at 4 this morning with a blocked nose though so today will be a long one

Bad day in this household. None of us got enough sleep last night and it really showed. DS kept shouting about anything and everything which made DD cry. I think DS and I were having a competition in stubborness.

Mondays are normally are toughest days - I'm really hoping that tomorrow is better.

The wind makes DS overexcited. We had a lovely walk in the woods yesterday - I was so glad that we hadn't missed the bluebells

Ah great you managed to see the bluebells dimples. I always find them very calming so hopefully will have the same impact on DS.

DD loves wind too. She says she is a "wind tiger" and howls (?!) and likes to take her coat off so she can feel it more. Of course, DS copies her, which means I am constantly worried about them dying of exposure (well, less so now it's May ) but it is pretty cute.

Hope you had a better day dimples.

at wind loving dc 💨

Pretty good day here though only reading accomplished. We had a longer walk this morning and ds was good again.

Finally school work is about telling the time - current special interest for DS! Woo!

Another bad day here - grrrrrr
DS actually did some very good school work this morning but this afternoon (which was pretty relaxed and did not involve any school work) he was so defiant and shouty.

We had more bluebell therapy which cheered us greatly. We're going to head to the seaside after breakfast - I think I need to focus more on DS having fun and our relationship rather than doing school work.