Has anyone tried sleeping training ?? Help

[Daisyflower12345]

How did you do it ?

I really need to do something as I'm physically and emotionally drained!
DD is 14months and still isn't sleeping through the night an regularly wakes up. I'm so sleep deprived. Many have mentioned to try the Ferber method where you come in after long intervals. I just need to do something and this is literally my last and final option I don't know wat else to do.

Has anyone tried this ?? Has it worked ? Was it the worse thing ever ? Please any advice will help.

She was called sleepy moon keeper but I think she changed the business name so I'll ask her and report back. It cost £250 I think for over the phone support. I got more than my monies worth for sure.

The way I see it is, it's not your job to get them to sleep, but it is your job to help them learn how to do it themselves.

@Indecisivelurcher if she was just grumpy/annoyed I could wait a while, yeah. If she sounds really screamy/upset I would struggle. I have always just assumed night wakings were because she was hungry and they would stop in time, but although she’s taking less and less milk, is now sometimes sleeping through her feeds, she hasn’t gotten out of the habit of waking up. So, although I worked really hard on going to sleep at nap time and bedtime, I have never done any work on wakings as I just assumed they’d stop on their own. But it doesn’t look like that’s going to happen and I have to do something about it now!

@Indecisivelurcher

The way I see it is, it's not your job to get them to sleep, but it is your job to help them learn how to do it themselves.

Yes, this is exactly it. And I spent months teaching her how to fall asleep by herself. It did involve some crying but was more of a gradual retreat approach than CC. But now, I don’t need to teach her how to sleep, I think I need to help her break the habit of waking overnight.

Thanks for checking about the sleep consultant. She sounds amazing!

@Dillybear not sure if you said how old your little one is?

@Indecisivelurcher she’s eight months now. Eating well - have three meals, four breastfeeds, and one bottle of formula a day.

@dillybear it sounds like we have the same baby except mine doesn't feed overnight anymore (bottle fed). She is also 8 months, self settles at bedtime then has random wakings and won't go back to sleep. So over it.

I know it's common to say they should be night weaned by that age, my Dd was but my ds no way, he was still having milk at night over 1yo. Have you tried a dream feed?

If you can rule out hunger in your own mind then you'll be happier to go for sleep training.

The sleep consultant I used is now called Sleep Dreams Baby, and her name is Boogie. @Dillybear - She's on Facebook and expect website too.

Well I used to do a dreamfeed using formula but I stopped it a few months ago as she was taking as little as 60ml some nights, having been smashing through 200ml before. Also, the dreamfeed was waking her up and it would take 2 hours to get her to go back to sleep, so after a few weeks of that I stopped it. She would just wake up for a breastfeed a little later, but too late for me to wait up to go to bed.

I’m pretty sure she’s not hungry. Last night she slept 7.20-4am. She woke up and I fed her but she came off herself after 2.5 minutes. Then was awake til 5.40 and slept til 7.40.

She does sometimes just wake the once, but even then she’s not especially hungry, and she’s not starving when she wakes for the day.

@Indecisivelurcher

The sleep consultant I used is now called Sleep Dreams Baby, and her name is Boogie. *@Dillybear* - She's on Facebook and expect website too.

Thanks! I’ll look her up

If you're not worried she's hungry @Dillybear, she's now self settling for bedtime, her naps and bedtime are age appropriate, I think you are surely nearly there! I would say treat night wakings the same as bedtime. Do interval checks. Don't rush in for the first one.

@indecisivelurcher I think that my DD falls into this category. Her bedtime and naps seem fine, based on all the charts on the internet.

She does do a 4 hour wake window before bed which some places say is too long but some say is fine 🤷‍♀️

How long would you leave it for each interval check?

@olivesonapizza does she settle herself at bedtime?

I can't quote whatever the interval minutes are that ferber suggests, I've forgotten them! They'll be online somewhere! I think someone may have answered that question up thread maybe, they also suggested reading the actual book, which I never did but expect it would be interesting / useful.

Ah here's a link :
www.whattoexpect.com/first-year/sleep/ferber-method-sleep-training/

I wrote them down and stuck them on the door!

@indecisivelurcher yep and has done for weeks. Same for naps 🤷‍♀️ I don't even need to put her down drowsy, she goes into her cot wide awake!

Only thing is she does use a dummy so I guess some sleep experts might say that is a problem?

They might do, but from what I've read that's more when you have to keep going back in to put the dummy back in. I think try cc... Hopefully it'll just be a last nudge that's needed!

My ds used to settle for all his naps and at bedtime too!

@Indecisivelurcher This is really giving me hope. I have been thinking that given she self settles at the start of sleep maybe there’s a reason she wakes so much overnight. But maybe it is really as simple as a habit.

@olivesonapizza We do have the same baby! Maybe my DD is moonlighting at your house haha. My DD did have a dummy but she needed it replacing overnight so much I got rid of them a while ago. It was actually pretty painless! She cried for six minutes the first night and just went to sleep.

Hope some of what I've said helps some of you, no pressure ey 😬

@indecisivelurcher it has really helped! I've been wondering about trying CC for ages and I think it might finally be time.

@dillybear so much of what you say resonates! I also sometimes doubt myself and wonder if my DD is hungry but she is definitely not ravenous in the morning so I really don't think that is it. The times I've given in and got a bottle she hasn't settled anyway.

@olivesonapizza well if your DD doesn’t settle with a feed that’s even more reason not to offer one. My DD often settles very quickly after a feed. A wake up can be 7-8 minutes from start to finish, on a good night! But one earlier this week was 2.5 hours, for no reason that I could work out. Her wake ups are now all over the place as well, at really unpredictable times, so I find it really hard to switch off and go to sleep because I am constantly on edge thinking about how any moment I might be woken up. She’s not the worst sleeper, I know that, but I still really struggle with the sleep deprivation.

@Daisyflower12345 sorry you had another rubbish night, long night wake ups are the worst. If my DS does wake up it's at least a hour and a half, who knows what they are thinking. Hope you have a better night tonight.

@HoneyPea I know I have no idea to why she was wide awake and for 4hours! Lol me and DH just gave up.

I'm hoping and praying she will have a better night tonight as I'm soo tired. She went to bed at 7.20pm so fingers crossed.

How are you ? X

@Daisyflower12345 Did she bother you during the time she was up or just play on her own?
We've had 4 good nights in a row either 12 or 13 hours with no wake ups (well none more than 5minutes that we have had to get up for!) When he does wake up and cries for more than 5minutes it means he's up and he will scream uncontrollably until you go in to him and sometimes won't even stop then 😕 i end up going into his room and sleeping on the floor. As long as I'm there he will lie back down or play with his toys for a few hours and then go back to sleep. It's so strange 🤷‍♀️