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Original poster

The great non-sleepers - the sequel

983 replies

Jellybean2017 · 31/12/2017 09:07

New thread!

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UtterlyConfused111 · 18/01/2018 08:12

Hello everyone
Welcome @unlurk - it’s no fun is it?
Three wake ups last night with two of them lasting 45 minutes each. Not the worst night by any means, so I shouldn’t be ungrateful. The wind was howling away here too!
One of the reasons this thread is great and all the ladies on here are amazing is that it makes me realise I’m not the only one in this situation. I saw that others also go to sleep at 840/9pm with their DC to maximise sleep and... well their OHs also complain about it. Equally I’m not alone in wanting to hit DH with a spade (or a car door) :-)
It is DD1s fourth day at preschool, she goes Tuesday and Thursday. She does 9-12.... if she takes to it it means I have three hours of respite from two kids. I had to go pick her up early Tuesday though because she got so upset. Hope today is better!! I would really treasure those mornings off...,

UtterlyConfused111 · 18/01/2018 08:20

Was the paediatrician recommending CC at a very busy NHS trust? I’m still really dumbfounded by this. But then I made a promise to myself after DD1 never to be judgy of what other parents too. It’s so tough we should all support each other.

Having said that one of my husbands friends had a baby 15 weeks ago, and we worried about how she would cope as she is very rich, very fragile and very precious. She told me three weeks ago she has hired a sleep trainer (her DS was 12 weeks) and sleep trainer is doing CC which she was finding tough.

Again flabbergasted! I thought most sleep trainers won’t do anything before 6 months and also my DD1 was in a super strict feeding routine from 12 weeks (because of heart medication that needed to be taken every 8 hours with a feed) but there was never any CC involved. She was too young!

I didn’t say anything though just nodded. I guess everyone does their own thing - but I suspect she also had her paedritican recommend CC

Original poster
Jellybean2017 · 18/01/2018 08:21

Welcome @unlurk 😊

So we had five wake ups here 🙈 but he didnt wake for the day until 8. So swings and roundabouts - I must have got about 6 or 7 hours of broken sleep in.

Like lots of you I also go to bed early. DH does the washing up from dinner and any other house jobs needed and then has an hour or so on his xbox while he listens out for if I need help (however sometimes I have to text him if I need help as he has his headphones on 😒) I would like nothing more than to spend a few hours with him in the evenings though. But it's not forever. And gives him time to chill out after work. So he secretly loves it haha.
It does mean we barely spend any time together during the week which we have both acknowledged and talked about so hopefully we can get through it. Tough though! at the weekend DH takes DS downstairs while I have some sleep first thing.

Oh dear - we seem to have a 💩 in progress here. Hope everyone has a good day!

OP posts:
Original poster
Jellybean2017 · 18/01/2018 08:51

@utterlyconfused it was at a standard district general NHS..
My understanding was that cc not recommended til minimum six months. But as you say, I don't like to be judgy re. Other parents decisions. I just don't think it's a paediatricians place to recommend it. But the end of the appointment he had decided DS might have reflux after all and prescribed omeprazole 😒 We decided not to give it and things have got better so it might just have been something he's grown out of.

OP posts:
Ven83 · 18/01/2018 09:04

@xxrealistmumxx My Mum says, small kids - small worries, big kids - big worries. Doesn't bode well Shock

DS has continued to wake up every 2 hours or so :( he'll be 4 months in a couple of days so I guess that's the sleep regression then.

Ven83 · 18/01/2018 09:50

@UtterlyConfused111 That's just appalling. You have to wonder, why do they even become kids doctors if they hate children so much that they insist leaving a barely just born baby to cry for 3 weeks is good for them?! The cynic in me thinks these doctors must make some profit from pushing on controlled crying - I suppose many parents do end up hiring sleep trainers to help them cope...

UtterlyConfused111 · 18/01/2018 10:03

@ven83

Yes it is appalling! But personally I believe in moderation in all things; I know it’s difficult with babies and we all of us here know it’s absolutely god awful without sleep. I have friends who called in a sleep trainer when their DD was 3. She didn’t settle in the evenings, still slept in their bed, woke up a lot. It worked for them and after a week they were so utterly grateful after 3 years to have their evenings back so they could just have a meal and watch some telly - and occasionally go out. I think in that situation I would call in professional help and do the same. But there is a large gap between doing that and sleep training a 12 week old! But no need for me to rant :-)

UtterlyConfused111 · 18/01/2018 10:08

Question for all here
Over the last week DD1 has take to pooing multiple times a day. Previously she was once a day or once every other day.
But she has also now transitioned fully over the last week from boob to bottle. Is there a link between that and poo frequency?
Or just a coincidence?

UtterlyConfused111 · 18/01/2018 10:08

DD2 that is (16 weeks old)

actino · 18/01/2018 11:46

@UtterlyConfused111, I'd guess that it's not the bottle that is making her poo more, but that it's either a coincidence or the change itself is causing her to poo more. My Dd is EBF and poos after almost every feed.

Emberblu · 18/01/2018 13:53

Hi all, been lurking here for ages so it's about time I post.

My ds has just turned 3 months old. I feel like his sleep is getting worse and worse with nothing no longer than 2 hour stretches the last few nights! He is also a very clingy baby who requires lots of bouncing to sleep and can barely be put down and has also gone back to only napping on me which we had sorted out a month ago! So days are exhausting too, but you all know that Grin

We went to a baby group for the first time today and it just made me depressed seeing all the other babies happily playing on mats for long stretches or drifting off to sleep in their prams. Made me feel like I've done everything wrong... dh said it's just a snapshot and they could be struggling too but I'm not so sure...

actino · 18/01/2018 14:09

Welcome @emberblu! You've definitely not done anything wrong, your baby is just doing what your baby does. Don't get caught up comparing yourself to others, I'm sure that all of those mothers either struggle with something else, or have in the past gone through the same struggles that you are going through.

A long as your baby is happy, you are definitely doing the right thing!

xxrealistmumxx · 18/01/2018 16:35

actino LO def pooing more frequently since formula was introduced. I've been told there's often less 'waste' with breast milk so less to get rid of

xxrealistmumxx · 18/01/2018 16:44

Welcome emerblu definitely not anything you've done / not done. You just get what you're given when it comes to babies I'm afraid. But don't worry, in my experience all us mum's get it rough at one stage or another. And you never really know what's going on behind closed doors!

LO been hard work pain in the backside today Sad really hope this isn't another leap / sleep regression. Currently squirming in my arms / head butting me, battling his last nap of the day. DH away this weekend so I'm praying the next few nights won't be like last night.

You're in good company here emerblu

xxrealistmumxx · 18/01/2018 16:44

Welcome emerblu definitely not anything you've done / not done. You just get what you're given when it comes to babies I'm afraid. But don't worry, in my experience all us mum's get it rough at one stage or another. And you never really know what's going on behind closed doors!

LO been hard work pain in the backside today Sad really hope this isn't another leap / sleep regression. Currently squirming in my arms / head butting me, battling his last nap of the day. DH away this weekend so I'm praying the next few nights won't be like last night.

You're in good company here emerblu

xxrealistmumxx · 18/01/2018 16:44

Welcome emerblu definitely not anything you've done / not done. You just get what you're given when it comes to babies I'm afraid. But don't worry, in my experience all us mum's get it rough at one stage or another. And you never really know what's going on behind closed doors!

LO been hard work pain in the backside today Sad really hope this isn't another leap / sleep regression. Currently squirming in my arms / head butting me, battling his last nap of the day. DH away this weekend so I'm praying the next few nights won't be like last night.

You're in good company here emerblu

xxrealistmumxx · 18/01/2018 16:44

Welcome emerblu definitely not anything you've done / not done. You just get what you're given when it comes to babies I'm afraid. But don't worry, in my experience all us mum's get it rough at one stage or another. And you never really know what's going on behind closed doors!

LO been hard work pain in the backside today Sad really hope this isn't another leap / sleep regression. Currently squirming in my arms / head butting me, battling his last nap of the day. DH away this weekend so I'm praying the next few nights won't be like last night.

You're in good company here emerblu

xxrealistmumxx · 18/01/2018 16:44

Welcome emerblu definitely not anything you've done / not done. You just get what you're given when it comes to babies I'm afraid. But don't worry, in my experience all us mum's get it rough at one stage or another. And you never really know what's going on behind closed doors!

LO been hard work pain in the backside today Sad really hope this isn't another leap / sleep regression. Currently squirming in my arms / head butting me, battling his last nap of the day. DH away this weekend so I'm praying the next few nights won't be like last night.

You're in good company here emerblu

Sakura03 · 18/01/2018 16:53

WhoAteAllthePercyPigs hope you’re feeling better.
ven83 thanks for the info regarding the tongue tie, will give it a go.

Thought we were off to a horrendous night after a 48 minutes sleep but then ds decided to sleep 4.5 hrs. After that we had 3 hrs of co-sleeping/feeding and got up just after 9 am.
We’ve been out for a walk and to get some batteries for ds’ new bouncy chair. Glad the stormy weather we had overnight had stopped in the morning. Ds has been quite sleepy today I hope this doesn’t impact on his sleep tonight...

Anyone watching Kiri?

Sakura03 · 18/01/2018 17:05

Welcome Emberblu my ds is a little younger than your ds (9.5 weeks) but we’ve been to baby massage twice now and still haven’t done any massage as ds wants feeding when we get there (despite having fed just prior to getting there) and then falls asleep- it’s hilarious😆 I could feel bad about it as like in your situation some of the other babies just get on with it and seems to enjoy it (but there are also one or two babies that cry by the time we finish). It’s just one of those things and at least it gets us out of the house for a bit😊

Emberblu · 18/01/2018 17:23

Thanks everyone. I haven't had much experience with babies but I've never met one like my little boy, it seems like he's only content for very short amounts of time. But we'll struggle through of course.
Fingers crossed for some more sleep tonight since we are away in London this weekend so am expecting some bad nights with a messed up routine not that we have much of a routine

AMagdalena · 18/01/2018 18:16

@Emberblu Welcome to the gang! You are probably in the thick of Leap 4, if I am correct? It's God awful, but it does get better! DD has gone from being a drama queen 24/7 to being pretty happy and content. Sleep is still hit and miss, but you can't have it all, can you?

I am considering chopping my head off to stop neck pain. I am dreading the night not because of DD, but because I can't get comfy at all 😭

Emberblu · 18/01/2018 18:26

Amagadela I think we are going through leaps a bit early so could definitely be leap 4 combined with the teething making for a very fussy baby. I found the whole newborn stage very difficult and then felt bad for finding it difficult, but I can't deny that I'm looking forward to him being a bit more independent and able to sit up and entertain himself for short amounts of time Grin I just have to remember it could be worse. For the first 6 weeks of life he would ONLY sleep on one of us which made for some very looooong nights.

UtterlyConfused111 · 18/01/2018 19:08

@amagdelena
Ouch! I get neck pain too, I think it’s exacerbated by the cosleeping in funny curled up around baby positions. I tried osteapathy for back pain before I was pregnant and it really helped. Worth a try?

@emerblu
Welcome.....! As far as playgroups etc go, I have had the same with DD1 who is two. On my second maternity leave I’ve been going out with her in the mornings to playgroups etc so she works off her energy while I can feed DD2 in peace (that was the theory). She was always the worst behaved child in every playgroup or soft play center clinging and shouting and tantrums and crying. She’s driven me to tears a lot of the time compounded with sleepless nights from DD2. I was like you wondering why it was always my child that was struggling
But ray of light here - she did get better eventually, whether it was teething or growing or new sibling or separation anxiety, whatever it was she had worked it off - mostly, not always.
It will get better for you too; and everyone has this... every single one of the mums will have had some sort of issue. So don’t worry.. as we all keep saying to each other
This too shall pass!!!

AMagdalena · 18/01/2018 19:19

@Emberblu My DD is of the clingy type, too. Co-sleeping with the odd stint in the cot. All naps on me, still. At 5 months...
DD used to scream if not held for any amount of time. It has been though. I am not one to pretend here.

@UtterlyConfused Thanks for the tip. Might give it a try in the future! In the short term though, my physio friend is coming to sort me out on Saturday. Can't wait, to be honest!