Anyone want to accompany me while i sleep train DD?

[MrsKoala]

I am starting to sleep train 13mo DD tonight. She has been a terrible sleeper since birth and always co-slept on the boob. I had a consultation with a sleep expert today who has talked me thru a gentle process of sleep training.

I am starting tonight as DH is away for a week from next Thursday, so i want it in place for then. DH is not particularly supportive because he hates them crying (and i love it obviously ) so it would be great if there was someone who was doing theirs at the same time for a mutual support group!

I've been waiting for my periods to come back to book it - as they always like to fit it when i'm menstruating. But it just hasn't yet. I'll call them in the New Year and ask what they suggest. I hope now i'm not feeding at night my body may get back to normal tho. Not that i particularly want a period. I was hoping to glide seamlessly into the menopause. Which is what my sister did after having her kids.

Fair enough Isa, although for those of us who didn't know that, it did sound a bit rude, imo.

Mrs K I sat with my legs up the wall when ttc with DD! And it obviously worked, so bicycle legs will be on the agenda next month. I didn't bf and my periods started about 6 weeks after DD was born but my cycle ranges from 22 - 36 days, so I'm forever checking my fertility app and peeing on sticks. Maybe I just need to stop stressing about it.

They prefer to do coils on your period as the uterus is softer then or something, so it's easier, but can be done any time.

Yes my first 2 were done when I wasn’t on my period. Then I went to get my 3rd one and the nurse was really pissed off I wasn’t menstruating and refused to do it. So I’ll need to check if they will here. It hurts way more when you aren’t on tho and I’m stil not right down there- which I think I need to see the dr for too.

We're away at the in laws. DD is in a travel cot and we've just started the routine. She is screaming like a crazy person!!

Oh dear. Visiting relatives always fucks it up.

DD appears to now have chicken pox. Great. I'm hoping it's just a rash but 2 of the spots now have blisters on.

Yeah a new setting always ruins the routine for my DS. I reckon he would have been sleeping through had we not gone to France in Sept then the other side of the country in Oct.
Oh no MrsK really not good timing. Hope it's just a rash.

Oh Jesus Koala. I have been reading your thread whilst dealing with my own non sleeping toddler. If I am honest it has served as a reminder that it could always be worse.

I was hoping things had improved for you, but chicken pox FFS. you have complete and total permission to throw your toys out of the pram and book yourself into the nearest premier inn for a night or two.

Does anyone's else's DC bang their head on the top of the cot while getting comfortable? Makes me consider bumpers if I didn't know better.

Merry (😫) Christmas everyone - please can I join? I have 15-month-old twins. Both regularly wake, especially when out of routine or unwell (which has been pretty constant since October) but one in particular wakes every night. We’ve been up since 3am, staying at my mum’s with a houseful of guests so sneaking around trying to keep quiet. I have a 5 year old who has always slept really well. I do remember having to sleep train her at times but it was much easier as I could tune in to her rhythms (now i get confused in the middle of the night about which one has woken up and whether it was for the same reason as the night before etc) plus I haven’t felt able to let them CIO for fear of waking the other.

I need to get a plan in place for when we’re finally back at home. I’ve just taken on a new full-time job which starts in the new year and want to make a good impression rather than being a grumpy zombie!

Welcome waitress! DD did a few hours in the travel cot and then the rest of the night in my bed. I'm just gonna continue like that and start again when we get home.

Also, AF came and went within a few hours, so I wasn't sure it was definitely AF. Turns out it wasn't, as I got a BFP this morning!

Omg fanny congrats thats amazing news! And what a day to get your BFP!
Yes cariad my DS bangs his head on the end of the cot or sides. No matter where I put him down to sleep he will always wriggle to the top and hit his head.
I've had 2 horrible nights sleep, DS has a horrendous cough and just can't lay down so last night I was on the sofa with him most of the night, managed to get a few hours in bed with him. He is just a big ball of snot and I'm currently spending Xmas sat in the bathroom with the shower running hoping to get some steam to loosen him up a bit. Good news is though I think his tough has finally cut through!
Merry Christmas everyone, hope you all have a lovely day with your little ones. X

Oh Fanny! Congratulations!! What a fantastic xmas present. I remember with DS1 i was convinced i was pregnant as i felt so unwell. But i went to get an X-ray on my broken wrist and they did a test and said i wasn't the day before xmas eve. So on Xmas day i had loads to drink and then boxing day i felt so incredibly rough and my period still hadn't arrived so i did a test and it was BFP!!

I've been so lucky, every BFP has been the most happy time for me (of course it coincides with feeling like death warmed up for 3 months - but so worth it). I hope you have a great xmas.

DD was awake in the night and has gone down for a nap now with DH. Her rash is about 6 blisters on the belly and one on the shoulder - so i don't know if it's the pox or not. The boys are 'singing' into the microphone bought for them by my Mum (Cheers for that!) and i'm doing dinner surrounded by debris.

DS2 has the runs (all over his lovely new M&S PJs. Not JUST the shits, but explosive M&S shits down to the ankles!) but no puking, so i think hope it's all the sweets he's been eating rather than a bug.

A Christmas BFP! Congratulations 😊!
I’ve managed a 45min snooze this afternoon so feeling a bit more rational about coping tonight. Part of the problem last night was that DD1 was already in the bed with us having woken up excited about the day ahead. As long as that doesn’t happen we have the co-sleep option (but only works for one baby at a time).

Basically whatever it takes to get through tonight and we’ll strategise more when we’re back at home.

Hope everyone had a lovely Christmas and a bit of sleep last night. DD spent all night in the travel cot, but I think she was exhausted after all the excitement. I spent all night worrying about telling DP about the pregnancy and then wondering if DD will sort her sleeping out in 9 months! Pregnancy is planned but DP has become a little bit disillusioned with the idea ever since DD's sleeping habits started to become a disaster 😬

Having been in this situation i would say really focus on the sleeping with DD sooner rather than later.

I said i didn't want another till we sorted the sleep of the first and second, then i got pregnant immediately and we told ourselves we have 9 months to sort it. But i was so tired the first 16weeks that i couldn't face any sleep training and DH wouldn't do it.

When i was pregnant with DS2 i had placenta preavia and was in hospital from 29 weeks. Which meant DH and my Mum just let DS1 sleep any way he would go. Then when DS2 was a baby MIL got sick and died and we were always travelling and had no time/consistency. Fil came to live with us for 3 months so all 4 of us were in one room - meaning all co-sleeping badly.

Then i got pregnant with DD and again the first 2 were still nightmares and i was tired again, we moved house (again - 7th time in 5 years) so put it off...And before we knew it DD was born and no sleep training had been done.

We now co-sleep with all 3 and DH is saying he doesn't feel 'done'. I'm like WTF!????

Well he would say that MrsK, as he isn’t the one left to do all of the work with the dc. You are!

Wow MrsK! You actually are superwoman. I think that when I'm feeling stressed and tired, I'm going to remind myself of some of your posts. DD was awake for 2 hours in the night, but then didn't get up till 7, so it's swings and roundabouts. Waiting for the pregnancy tiredness to kick in, can't remember when it started with DD.

Hi, can I join in? I've a 9 month old that's never slept longer than 4 hours. She's usually up every 2 hours and now just co- sleeps with me.
I'd really like my husband back in bed with me, and we are planning to ttc in the new year. So she's got to move to her own bed.
To complicate things we are temporarily living with inlaws while the house us refurbished.

So the issues are:- co-sleeping, with a nipple in her mouth all night
Frequent wakings
No daytime sleep routine
Gah. It's a bit pants. I went all attachment parent when she was born- but I need my bed back now. Still not keen on lots of crying so prepared for it to take a while.

Did I mention how utterly buggered I feel? 😧

It's nice of you to say - but the reality is i am not. This has happened incrementally. If someone said this is what will happen 5 years ago, i'd have said you must be joking. But each thing happens externally like moving house, DH changing jobs, people getting cancer, dying, fil with dementia etc. And then amongst it all we had 3 kids. I know it seems crazy but it was have the kids now and ride it out or not at all, as i'm 41 in a few weeks.

Pregnancy tiredness for me was bone crushing. I've never ever felt so ill. With DS1 i went blind in one eye for 12 weeks with optic neuritis. I got migraines with all of them and nausea. Everyone knew i was pregnant from about 2 weeks as i could barely stand up. So try to rest as much as you can. It's very very draining. Can you DH take over some of your things? Perhaps do more with the sleep training?

I meant to say that DS1 isn't NT, so that has been the cause of a lot of our sleep issues - he has sensory issues and needed/needs a very specific set of events to fall asleep. So that isn't usual and it's had a knock on effect on the other 2. I hope reading my situation doesn't put anyone off. It really is very specific to us and there's no reason sleep training wont work quicker and better for everyone else.

In fact DD is still doing really well with no night feeds, altho she still wakes 2-3 times to be settled. We are going to start phase 2 now i think.

Oh dear drink, that sounds really similar to my DD. I'll PM you something which helped later.

Welcome drinkyourmilk. Have you decided what you ate going to tackle first or are you going to go all in and ride it out?
Great that your DD is doing better MrsK. What does stage 2 involve for you?

DS slept through again last night thankfully. His tooth is through, cough seems slightly better and just waiting for all the snot to go! He has his first nursery settling session tomorrow ready for me going back to work next week :-( not really sure how I'm going to get my brain back into work mode. I'm fully expecting work/nursery to mess with his routine and cause so sleep issues too.

That sounds great Boodles - you are doing so well. I can't imagine the stress that going back to work would be on top of bad sleepers. There are days when i can't function at all and i think 'Christ, some people have to go to work now!'

Phase 2 is DS2 going up to his own bed with DH and DD sleeping in her room alone with me doing the same as bedtime to settle her each time she wakes.

I honestly don't know where to start. I think all at once is unfair on her as in effect I caused this. I'm really torn as I'm still a lentil weaving hippy- but a broken one that needs some sleep. Dh took her last night and used the travel cot and she was brought back 6hours later- apparently she screamed the whole time