Controlled crying - moving from attachment parenting to abandonment parenting?

[tinkerbellhadpiles]

I know this is going to get a few people annoyed so I've put my special teflon knickers and fireproof boots on first. This is a genuine question:
I don't get controlled crying. I've spent a long time thinking about this (mostly at 2am when my DD wakes up hungry). If you put yourself in the place of the child, is this not a movement from attachment parenting to abandonment parenting
You spend all day lavishing attention on your child, when the little one cries you comfort him or her, sacrificing your time to do anything else in favour of looking after her.
Then seven a clock rolls round and you suddenly start ignoring her, until she learns that you just abandon her at nights and gives up and goes to sleep through exaustion or frustration.
To my mind controlled crying is an oxymoron, a child cries because they are out of control, frustrated, hungry or frightened. And if you are sitting there on the stairs sobbing because you can hear her (as a lot of my friends do) then you aren't in control either. Is it just a battle of wills or is there a genuine bit of science in here?
Seriously, will someone PLEASE explain how this actually works?
Incidentally, I don't have a much better solution, my DD (five months) sleeps 7-2:30, has a feed and sleeps till about 6ish. We just deal with it now and honestly I don't mind now I'm used to it. She did wake up every hour for a month when she got to three and a half months and I was fairly psychotic after a week of it and did pick up, put down and that worked to get to the above situation.

Come on, why are you angry? Is it that you don't see your lo during the day?

omg. some semblance of humour.

go on.

answer my last 2 questions.

first read my posts properly, then you can have a definition of CC

did you really do CC while your dd was in the womb DaddyJ. tell me how.

or rather

read your own post below:

By DaddyJ on Thu 03-May-07 15:31:12
We did it in stages, cruisemum1.

Tried cc at 2 months, failed miserably.
Before 3-4 months: cosleeping.
At 4 months, straight CC at 7pm, she would wake up between 1-3 for feed in our bed, co-sleeping rest of the night.
At 6 months tried straight CC during rest of the night, gave up after 3 nights. It was just before xmas so we thought, sod this for a laugh, let's just enjoy Crimbo!
From then on 1/2 night feeds until she was 7 months old - when we did straight CC during the night, this time we persevered, after 3 nights she was sleeping 7-6.

All beautiful until a month or so ago when she had a tummy bug, after disruption more or less back in the rhythm.
Sometimes she wakes up in the middle of the night, I go to her and do my cc with pp thing.
And sometimes she wakes 5ish and we take her into our bed for first boob session of the day.

Hope tonight is good again for you, cruise.
You have been working hard at this.

what a load of bullshit.

you are making up your definition of cc as you go along.

just like everything else, i imagine.

why don't you get yourself a job as a pulp novelist?

Stop lying and then we can continue.

Admit that I fully acknowledged the Gordon link.

And stop reducing my dd's age when we first did CC. It was 4 months and we did not do CC during the night until 6 months.

Just as Ferber recommends by pure chance!

Yes, it failed.
Half an hour of crying followed by co-sleeping for another month and a half!

no aloha, sigh, i don't care for my baby all day. just like you don't care for yours all day.

i said that already.

go on. you know you are bigger than that, you know, journo and all that.

I hope your lo never reads your posts, btw!
Language, kiskidee, language.

so i take it you didn't read anything on CC before you made a 2 month old scream her head off.

i hope she does daddyj! mama has nothing to hide.

Let's get back to you kiskidee: why are you so cut up?

How are the voices in your head
Say hi from me.

Really? Do you talk like that at home?

I am afraid I won't be able to lower myself to your level but feel free to let it all out.

This is the kiskidee support thread, you know.

Are you feeling better?

ran out of something worthy to say dj?

But you didn't care for her any day from just four months did you dearie?

"there was no need to buy Ferber?s book and do the chart thing. "

lol.

so what is your definition of CC since it doesn't seem to be ferber's.

it if poor ferber's term. maybe you need to come up with your own term, 'drexpert'.

Still, I expect you are pretty sad about that and all the evidence about abandonment and daycare and the damage it does, eh?

(glass houses, stones....)

Ah, you have calmed down. Phew!
I was worried about your mental health there.

nope. unless you don't call weekends and holidays, days.

does not bother you?

do you want to call SS on me?

better yet, pay me to stay at home to look after her full time?

lol.

yes, it does, daycare causes such emotional damage too, doesn't it aloha.

go on. tell us, who cc'd your baby for you.

No, you haven't!
Still bashing Dr. Ferber, I am starting to feel for the guy. Come on, leave him alone, he cannot defend himself.

How's your head?

no, i respect dr ferber. i even read his book and have visited the website for the Boston Hospital where he has a sleep clinic. did you know that yet, dj.

Oh, so if you need or want to do it (put a tiny baby in full time daycare) it's OK regardless of the evidence of damage? Right, OK, we know where you are coming from at least. And it's hardly from a position of moral superiority, is it?