High-Need Baby Support Thread III

[TitaniaP]

Well as I'm awake I thought I'd start thread 3!

The high-need baby thread has been moved from breast & bottle feeding to sleep. In the early days of the thread I think feeding was a significant issue for many of the posters. I think those that post regularly on the thread would now agree that's it's mainly sleep that's the issue.

So if your baby fits the following criteria come and join us for wine, chocolate, coffee and matchsticks as we delight in our active, inquisitive, curious and restless babies or toddlers!

1. Feeds frequently daytime
2. Feeds frequently nighttime
3. Needs to be constantly held
4. Wont sleep alone
5. Hates the car seat/pram
6. Short naps

Another here who says snuggle away. I had 3 'normal' babies before my bundle of HN fractiousness. DH was exactly the same (and occasionally still is) but on the whole he's realised that if ds2 is happy, we're all happy .

I didn't find a stretchy wrap too hot last summer but I would wear it on it's own or just with a vest underneath.

Your DD needs you - she's been, to all intents and purposes, part of you for 9m and to be suddenly expected to be content alone in a strange world just doesn't suit some babies. Some it does - my other 3 were in their own room by 6w, sleeping through soon after that in 2 cases, but ds has truly broken the mould. He's still in our room, has slept better this week but until then has been a terrible sleeper. Still goes to sleep in my arms if I let him (though he self settles well too). Likes nothing better than a cuddle but is also independent. As I write this he's at the other end of the room, talking nonsense to the dog and putting his fingers up the dog's nose

The difference between 9w and 13y is 12y43w. It's silly to base what dd will be like in 12y43w time on what she is now. I know we all say things in the heat of the moment, but really - its that silly. Your dd needs you and will grow to be an independent little terror darling just like ours, but I firmly believe that's because our babies were all given what they needed - unconditional, limitless love whenever it was needed try 24hrs a day!

That's not to say that it should always be you - having a HN baby is terribly wearing, so enlist helpful support wherever you can.

Also, for tea time fractiousness, unless you have a huge issue with them (I did but long since vanished!), might I suggest a dummy? DS wouldn't countenance a silicone one, but he loves his latex cherry shaped ones. In fact so much that he won't go up to the next size (who knew that dummies come in sizes?!) so we're stuck with Tommee Tippee bog standard latex ones. At least they're cheap!

enyfshedd sorry for the essay but your situation really struck a chord!

Meant to say, ds was 12m on July 16th.

Thanks for the advice & support buttonmoon78. I know think some of DP's short temperedness over this is due to several other factors at the moment (the PTSD & waiting for a response over compensation, computer not working properly so can't do work, summer holidays just starting so DSS2 (6) demanding a lot of his time although not as much as last year, etc).

The plan is for me to go back to work when DD is 7 - 7.5 months (January), 4 days a week and for DD to be in work creche 1-2 days a week (depending on budget), so we're semi-consciously working towards a schedule of getting her settled by December. I know she's going to be 3 times older then than she is now, but it seems such a long time away for us as well...

Mmm much cooler today, hooray! :)

Joyful Glad you had a good day (despite the poo explosion - poor you!) yesterday. You made me flash back to when DS was tiny, and didnt like me holding him any way except for upright against my chest. I tried propping him up in my lap against my knees and he responded by having a massive runny poo which escaped his nappy and covered me

I want a froggy newborn! I'm broody as all hell. But it will be a few years I think, until we're brave enough to try again!

Can't remember if I wrote it before, but happy 1st birthday BabyButton for 16 July :)

Hope you're doing okay today Enfyshedd!

So glad it's Friday! Olympics opening today, where on Earth did the last seven years go?! I remember the day it was announced - it was the day before my university graduation (if I remember rightly) 7/7/05... Graduating from a London university on the day of the London bombings. That was a very surreal day. Was so excited to graduate, but as the day unfolded we realised how lucky we all were to have escaped any harm. Was very strange and very sad.

Memories. Ah well. I hope you all have a good day! :) Enjoy the opening ceremony if you're planning on watching it!

Hi tickle. Not doing too bad today, but had to sleep with DD downstairs due to the heat in the bedrooms, and I'm now worried she's (and possibly me) has a tummy bug - have called the Doc's this morning after the latest pooey nappy who advised me to call back after lunch (in 5 minutes from now) for an appointment this afternoon because their computer system was down at that moment. DD seems fine, but doc would prefer to check over due to age and risk of dehydration with heat.

Just wish I'd had more sleep last night due to the heat (about 3 1/2 hours when you include the extra hour between 8 & 9am after DP had got up) - ugh!

Enfyshedd - Hope you both get better soon! If it's any reassurance my DD and I had a couple of months where we both got multiple stomach bugs - she nursed about every 20mins for the bad ones and was just fine. Just in case the doctor tells you otherwise, breastmilk is just fine for stomach bugs, and the better than water for littlies.... :) Will find a link...

kellymom.com/bf/can-i-breastfeed/illness-surgery/baby-illness/

Aww, poor tummies!!!
If it's any consolation all my dcs got the bug there apart from ds ( still bf). So for those of u who know me, and how dh was so, well, not just as supportive as he could have been, he is sooo vocal now about how bf has protected our ds from the bug.

So what I'm saying is, that bf is doing good, even if your dc gets the bug, it's probably mild compared to what could have been, or in the very least, it's still giving nutrients that dc would otherwise not have, so good luck, I hope your lo gets better v soon,

Sorry Joyful that you're feeling like this. Are u getting RL support? As a MH professional, I can see you have great insight, and my advice is not to let it get a hold of you, fight, fight, fight. Regular exercise is a natural way of releasing serotonin and should help ( I'm sure u know all of this...). Be kind to yourself and ( hugs).

Joyful, I hope you are feeling a little better this morning. Here if you need a chat.

So, we had a very respectable night last night. He went to bed at about 7.15pm, woke at 12.30ish for a feed/cuddle. Few squeaks in the early hours, but he settled back down, and I had to go and wake him at 7.20am. Proud of him.

Crappy weather here today :(

Hope you are all ok and having a good morning so far.

Hi everyone, I've changed jobs so haven't had time to do much else but lurk recently.

We seem to be making some progress with sleeping - we started dr jay gordons night weaning a week ago and we've had 2 nights where DS has slept for 8hrs in a row! He's only got upset at not being fed overnight once, and usually settles after a few sips of water. I'm missing cosleeping so much but we had to do something as I start on nights tonight.

I've mostly been lurking too! Great news on your DS Spanner - I'm thinking of trying Dr Jay Gordon's method too... 8 hours, that's amazing!

Great! Glad u are feeling a little better- we all get times like that I think! I also think that your dh will find a better job- a happier one: one door closes and another opens. When his knee gets better he will be well ready to get going, and while finances are so important, they really aren't everything. Things will pick up soon (hugs)

Hey all. Hope you're all okay. Glad you're feeling better Joyful :)

I love the Olympics. I wish they happened every year

Well ladies. I'm going to jinx the hell out of it. But sod it. It's only taken a year. But DS slept through last night, from 7.30pm to 7am. We didn't have to go up to him once It was my first office day in a good few weeks and was expecting him to need more attention in the night than he has for a while. But whenever he woke up, he had a little squeak, and managed to settle himself back to sleep. Crazy.

tickle sooo delighted for you and < has a word with babytickle> keep up the good work, and mummy will have loads more energy to take you lots of fun places!!

The job is ok thanks joyful - it was tough doing nights over the weekend but I have the rest of the week off how are you feeling?

Well done babytickle - hope it becomes a regular thing!

Another good night last night, he slept from 7.30-2, quick drink and back to sleep, then woke at 4 for a drink and up for the day at 6. He seems to be genuinely thirsty at night, he had about 3oz water, I'm reluctant to not give it to him because I'm always thirsty at night and end up drinking a big glass of water, but it means I have to keep going in to give him a drink.

I'm a dr joyful training to be a GP but doing paediatrics at the moment. Only 18 months and 2 big (expensive) exams until I'm done and we can afford baby no 2 slightly depressingly all of my colleagues have told me to do CC or CIO and think I'm a big hippy for cosleeping, still breastfeeding and my selection of slings (just started using cloth nappies part time too!)

DS is reliably sleeping for 5hrs between 8-1 but has now started waking for the day at 5.30. He just wants to practise standing and cruising now so cosleeping is difficult - I've got a bed guard up but he's trying to climb over it at every opportunity now!

I took him to the local farm the other day and we had a new word - duck! So all of the animals were either duck or cat - very cute!

Urgh. First visit from AF for a year and nine months...oh how I have missed you... :( :( :(

Hope everyone is doing well :)