What's the best (kindest) way to teach a 6 month old to go to sleep in her cot?

[Fevrier]

I have fed her to sleep so far and am now being paid back by hourly wakings ......

For naps I can rock her and put her in her pram and sometimes she just goes to sleep, so she has sleep associations with naps for her pram....

Bedtime it's a breast feed and then down when asleep but multiple rockings and feedings all night long - and it's getting silly.

Can anyone advise me how I should go about getting her down awake? I am so so so tired that I feel baffled by the whole thing and quite lost.

To be honest fevrier, we were only having one or two night feeds/wakings anyway. I just always had to rock her off, which I knew wasn't a great move! I do feel not breast-feeding as much has definitely had an impact, as she Is definately less.
Clingy in general. And will now sometimes settle with her dad, especially if she was to wake. (hence why he wanted a medal the other night for rocking her back off to sleep!!) she rarely falls asleep feeding as I don't really produce enough anymore, so has a top up before bed anyway.

About 5 weeks ago I tried CC and first few nights she whimpered herself eventually off to sleep. But then the crying started. Even before I put her in her cot, like she knew what was coming!! Broke my heart. So I broke the cycle and rocked her to sleep in the living room then took her up to her cot. At that point we were only generally having one feed (which I automatically did, presuming she was hungry!) then I came on here and started a thread about more frequent wakings. Was more like 3, with one being an hour or so just wanting to play. Could put it down to nothing more then developmental. I then found nectarinas thread! Btw... She also used to wake an hour after being put down and scream. To the point where I had to cancel my food at a restaurant with friends, cos hubby couldn't do a thing with her.

Before I started to actually try it, I had one night when I went to automatically feed DD, and she fell asleep before my milk even let down. Making me think she wasn't hungry. So the next couple of nights I rocked backed to sleep. Struggled with the play one At 3 am as she was wide awake. Started to take to bed so I could rest while she did as she plsed, and would rock or stroke her back to sleep when she showed signs of tiredness.

I then started this!! Not only has it meant I don't do the terrible (as my mum would say) deed of rocking her to sleep (which was all I wanted to achieve) It has currently stopped the frequent night wakings and when we now watch her on the monitor, her eyes open an Hout later, but she generally puts herself straight back to sleep. Miracle!! Meaning I may just be able to go out sometime soon!!

With regards to the dummy fevrier. She's not that fussed about it. She likes her thumb! It's handy for her naps, but at night she tends to fight with it to get her thumb in, which I am now going along with, rather than trying to stop her!

About the naps... I think perseveringly at this time is an important part of this, but I admit none of DDs naps are taken in her cot. Either I'm doing hair then she's in her bouncer or car seat. Or at home I put her in her swing. But since starting this, I have only rocked to sleep on 2 of her naps when she got overtired!!

DDs was settling herself immediately tonite, not a whimper in sight. Deep by 15 mins. How u doing this eve?! Xxx

Btw I slowed down bf when she was 4 months. Now feed only first and last thing. And night feed when she feeds xx

Well tonight I went to hospital because my son swallowed a coin! So I didn't exactly keep on with the sleep training! He's fine by the way and had an x ray to show it's in his tummy so all is well.

Baby fell asleep in the car seat on e way home but woke half an hour later for her bedtime feed. I fed and put her down not quite asleep and she rolled about and went off to sleep. So that's great. No crying......

But I have had a hell of a messy day without her really eating solids - no breakfast. Not much lunnch and a breast feed in stead of dinner - so there's no way she won't feed at least every 3 hours tonight!

Better get eating and go to bed............

Awww bless ur heart. Uve had quite a day of if!! So glad ur DS is ok!! So much to look forward to huh!!!! The no crying is good. U never know, she may take herself back to sleep a few times! Rest well, speak tomorrow xx

So a good night and back to 2 feeds 4 hours apart and other wakings she settled herself before I even got out of bed! Brilliant.

So self settling and going back into the cot slightly conscious make ALL the difference!

Only thing is when I fed her all the time she would have a 12 hour night and it's got shorter but I remember nectarina's thread saying this sorts itself out?

Anyway, I couldn't sleep after the first feed because I felt so well rested by 3 straight hours. Goes to show!

Ahhhhh fantastic news!! Woo hoo! Soooo pleased for u! Just read my last msg, premonition or what. Hehe. U feeling a bit more human this morning?! It will just get better now. My DD is the same. Bedtime 7.30/8 and used to wake 8/8.30 now 7/7.30. Not ridiculous tho do happy with that. Guess their sleep isnt interrupted either! She went straight thro again btw!! Xxx

Something u could always try, is when she appears to have fed completely before bed, offer her a top up. When my DD doesn't have hers she wants feeding in the night. If she does she doesn't xxx

Mtjay - so glad you have success!

I feel so much better and I am amazed really by how simple it is - thy just need to always go into the cot a bit awake.

Next trick is to keep it up!

Think I've been making a big mistake to always comfort to sleep. Seems like instinct could be wrong and that kind f bothers me.

I don't think that's a mistake fevrier! I doubt many ppl like to hear their young baby cry. Not when u can do something about it! Our dds are at the perfect age to learn this new skill. Any younger and they prob still need that comfort. Ur doing the right thing now before it gets harder!! Well done for persevering. Be interesting to see how she goes when she's fed well too!! Xx

Thanks mtjay, you are a great comfort! Amazing naps today - 2 hours this morn, 1.5 this pm Instead of the usual 40 mins. All in pram.

You are right that young babies def need comfort - I saw a lovely 6 week old yesterday and thought, yes I loved that stage! Adorable. Honeymoon period in fact when you don't need to worry about habits.

Today's question is how to get the solids / milk balance. Yesterday all milk... Today more solids....

I'm a bit baffled by that too!! If I give milk first she only takes a dew force fed spoonfuls, solids first then cries for milk and only takes biz. And then possibly hungry 10 muns later!!!! Arghh.

Hoe did dd go down tonite?! I only sat her up to wind as she last min decided she did want her bottle. But not s noise out of her. Asleep in mins once winded. Bless her!!

Great news about the naps. My dd are still short but took herself off for all 3 which is my goal. My client was flabbergasted by how easily she took herself to sleep. Proud mummy here!! Xxxx

Grrr... Only takes 3 oz xx

Great she is sleeping well for naps. How are you doing that?

I rock the pram with White noise and her rabbit - not self settling.

I think I pretty much fed her to sleep tonight as I kept here up for more than 3.5 hours to get bedtime to 6:30 so when she woke just now at 8:30 she cried for maybe 5 mins with me sitting next to her rocking the cot a bit. O well. Not a smooth path. Maybe should have tried to feed her earlier so she didn't fall asleep on me but it's all a learning curve.

I am finding it easier not to pick her up now I know that if I do she will destroy my sleep!

Well - the falling asleep on the boob WAS a mistake! She woke 2 hourly but I managed to only pick up and feed 3 times in 12 hours so not terrible.

Must put down awake and must shorten feeds too...... Ahh. Too much to concentrate on! Got a late hosp app this afternoon so it will mess up bedtime anyway.

Improvements are slow but happening.....

Ahhhh!!! Sorry It didn't go so well! Atleast u know the pros and cons. U have just have to stick with it so she learns. Maybe a touch confusing for her?! I think routine plays a big part. That bit for me is impossible by day. I just put her whereever it is she is going to sleep. Ie if I'm doing hair, her bouncer or car seat (if I'm close to finishing) at home it's in her swing. I tuck her up warm, give her her rabbit and dummy (which she normally replaces with a thumb) and leave her to it. She can see me at all times. Sometimes whimpers but never cries.

Tonite was about 20 mins of playful noises. Pretty sure I can leave the room now. I sit a few feet away but don't think she knows I'm here (cos that's when I catch up on mumsnet!! Haha)

Just had a thought.... Maybe being rocked in the pram by day is confusing her, so she has to keep relearning?! Is there anyway u can try her in her cot?! I know it must be tricky with ds but could you look some books and toys together while u help her get to sleep. I can prob tell I don't have a toddler! Lol. Just a thought xx

Thanks M - think she went down awaker tonight and she's stayed asleep.... Fingers crossed. (I feel bad that I am not being 100percent consistent because I think it IS confusing for her).

I feel she ought to nap in her cot but in all honesty I don't think it's realistic as her naps are of such random lengths that I need to go out often while she is already asleep.... The pram means we can do stuff and go places and come in and out! Got to keep busy with a toddler and living in a small flat. But in a while I must tackle one nap a day in the cot. I don't want to end up with a toddler who will only sleep in the pushchair (already had one of those!).

Lucky you having a thumb sucker. That's the key to your good nights I think.

Hopefully she'll do better tonight. I heard her peep just now after 2 hours but she settled... Bodes well....

I know how u feel about it being unrealistic. I think I would confuse my dd if I tried to get her to sleep in her cot! Cos it's so rare were in the right place at the right time!

I started to get into the realms of feeding to sleep, but when she was about 6 weeks I spoke to hv saying a fed her constant etc and it was then she told me she was unsettled cos she was tired. She then said to try a dummy. I had previously but she wasn't interested! I had to kinda force it on her! But since her hand to mouth coordination improved, she started on her thumb. I used to try stop her. Replace if with the dummy (I can take that away eventually!) but given in if that's what she wants, and yes ur right... Now a god send!

Hoping ur dd is still, and continues to sleep for while. Just try be as consistent as u can, and stick with it. Remember what uve learnt!! X x

Hurray! Another improved night.... Bed at 6:30, feed at 00:00, rock at 2:45 and feed at 5am. Up at 6:30

Getting better!

Thats fantastic! 5/6 hours between feeds. Well done u!!!!!! Keep it up fevrier! Deffo worth the input hey xxxx

Btw have u tried dream feeding?! If u tried that before u go to bed, u may get a little longer out of her. Didn't work for me cos of wind issues, but she did used to feed!! Xxx

It's brilliant - and the nights have improved the naps (not the other way round)

Self settling thoroughly worth doing,,,,,, especially with this baby.

Naps next. Gearing myself up for that. But need a bit of time first.

Well done. Got my fingers crossed for u for this eve xxx

Thanks Mtjay - hope yours continue brilliantly

How u doing f?! Xxx

Not bad thanks - down to 2 night feeds last night - 12 and 4am... Think we' ll be stuck at this for a while. Feel far better.

Yours still sleeping through?