4 month sleep regression- light at the end of the tunnel

[nearlymumofone]

I posted here a while back about the hell i was goig through with the 4 month sleep regression. And it really was hell. However I've been meaning to post here to let anyone going through it know there is light at the end of the tunnel. DS hit it at 16 weeks, and it lasted till 6 months, with the worst weeks being form 16-20 weeks. I was EBF at the time and I think this actually didn't help the sleep sitruation, at 5 months i introduced solids and a bottle, he was established on solids by 6 months and ff and slept through the night without waking. I can't tell whether the formula or solids helped, whether it was either or both, but his sleeping well coincided with him being well satisfied and full (he was very poor at bf and not gaining weight so it wasn't going well at hence i gave in at 5 months). We also introduced a blankie which was a godsend and put him in his own room. All of which seemed to positively contribute to him sleeping well. Maybe the regression would have passed without us doing these things, however they seemed to work well for us. Now DS is 9 months and unless he's ill/teething sleeps through the night (from 6.30-6.30 ish).

I just wanted to give hope to anyone going through it at the minute that it will get better.

[ChopMonster]

1.30-5 sounds great! It's the frequent wakings before and after that kill you though isn't it? DH has taken to coming to bed later lately, v annoying.

[Bet01]

Afternoon all. Borg that sounds like an ok night, and good to get some longer stints at last.
We didn't have a brilliant night. DS didn't have enough of an evening nap, and come 9.30pm bedtime he had to come in bed with us and be fed to sleep. I don't know why we've ended up with such a late bedtime, has it happened to anyone else? If I put him down by himself any earlier he'd just wake up. He has a nap at about 7pm which theoretically could be his bedtime but he wakes up after 45 mins so I don't see the point.
Anyway, I digress. DS woke at 1am as usual but between that and 5.45 am I'm not sure how often I fed him. He was really restless but not awake, thrashing his head, kicking his legs, rubbing his eyes and face, and propelling himself around the bed at all sorts of weird angles. Ended up sideways in between me and DP with us both perched on each edge of the bed!
At 5.45 am he was VERY awake but managed to feed him to sleep until 7.15am thank god.
He's just started getting eczema so maybe he's a bit itchy, and it's also quite hot, so maybe those are factors. We've had a couple of wriggly nights before though-like most things, no rhyme or reason to it!
How was everyone else's night?

[Bet01]

Just worked out last night was our 27th night of sleep regression, so I really hope it ends soon. Please don't let DS be one of those babies that doesn't improve for months! Borg I'm with you on the endless optimism, it's what keeps me going (well, that and a lot of cake).

[WeAreBorg]

Bet, oh no, hope that night was a one off, probably the heat? Random thought but realised the days I take DS swimming seem to zonk him out a bit? Maybe a coincidence though, but I'm willing to take him every day if not!
Re late bedtime, DS has quite strong bedtime cues - i.e. bath, massage, feed, song, bed, so he goes to bed whenever that happens (barring regression of course!), usually 7-8pm but often ends up later if we've been out or something, he'll just have an evening nap instead, don't know if that helps?

[WeAreBorg]

Or perhaps bring bedtime forward by 10mins a night? I'm really not the best to ask for advice though as you can see!

[Muser]

Hello, is this where the sleep deprived come to wail? I seem to be stuck in a never ending sleep regression. My daughter is 19 weeks. At 15/16 weeks she had a growth spurt, waking every 2 hours for a week. Then she went to waking every 3 hours instead. She has decided 4am is the perfect time to try and master the art of rolling over and will spend an hour crashing round her cot cooing while I desperately try to ignore her and go back to sleep.

When does this end? At one point she was doing 11-5am, or even 6am. It was bliss. Now I feel like a wreck. And everyone else I know seems to have babies who are starting to sleep longer, while mine just reverts to newborn.

I'm hoping I can ride this out but god it's knackering. I dream about running away and spending the night in a hotel all by myself. No baby crying. No husband snoring. Just me and my bed. Aaaaah.

[Bet01]

Welcome Muser! yes, unfortunately we don't know the meaning of the word on this thread.
Borg, thanks for the advice, I think I might try the 10 mins thing. DS doesn't have many baths because he's got a bit of eczema, but we do give him a massage and put him in his sleepsuit, which does count as a routine I think.
How were your nights ladies? Ours was rubbish. Seem to be going backwards again. Bed at 10.15pm, wake and feed at 12.40am, then numerous wakings and wriggling until 5.30am when DP got him up. At 7am he was ready for a nap though so clearly still tired. Makes no sense. I'm so disappointed that things are regressing again, feels like I'll never sleep again!

[Muser]

I'd say glad to be here Bet, but frankly I'd rather be on the "my baby sleeps from 7pm-7am" thread.

Last night was a typical one here. Asleep at 8pm. Awake again at 8.45pm. Back to sleep at 9.30. Awake at 12.30, 3.30, 6.30. Refused to go back to sleep at 6.30. Finally fell asleep again at 8.30am. That bit is not very typical. Normally the 3.30/4am waking is the one where she stays awake for ages and then finally she sleeps until 9ish. She did a cycle of sleep for 30 mins, have a feed, sleep for 30mins after that 8.30 one.

I have been told to give baby rice, but I don't want to. I've been told to leave her to cry, but I don't want to. I've been told to find other ways to soothe her rather than feeding, but she cries and at 4am I just want her to go back to sleep as quietly as possible.

[ChopMonster]

Welcome Muser. People keep telling me to give baby rice or not to feed him when he wakes but he's not ready for food and he just needs more milk right now. I don't think they wake out of habit when they're this young. I'm with you, I go with the quickest way to get him back to sleep!

Sorry your night was rubbish Bet. Hopefully tonight will be better. Have you got anything for his eczema?

DS seems to be sleeping an awful lot in the day now. He's gone from 4 short naps and only being awake an hour in between to 3 long naps and being awake a bit longer in between. Wish he'd sleep that well at night!

Bedtime is in limbo at the moment for us. Pre-regression he would go down about 6.30/7. Then when he hit the growth spurt it was more like 10pm. Now he is going down about half 7/8. We put him down when he is really tired but the minute he's in his cot it's playtime and he starts kicking like a loony. But if you get him up again he is really grumpy so we leave him to it as long as he's not crying. More often than not he refuses his bedtime feed. He drifts off after an 30mins/an hour or so of playing and then wakes an hour later for the feed he refused . Then he plays a bit more and finally drifts off at about 9.30.

Last night he woke at 8.30, 12.50, 3.50 and up at 6 for the day. He went for a nap at 7 though and we both then slept til 9 so I've almost forgiven him

Hope everyone else's night was better :)

[WeAreBorg]

Hello muser, I said exactly the same thing to DH last night about a hotel! I think we all go to a fancy hotel with a spa and don't come back, I'll book it, anyone else coming?
Chop your night was pretty similar to ours except he woke at 10pm too, and managed to keep him in bed until about 645.
Bet oh no I was really hoping last night was a one off, hopefully he'll be better tonight? What happens if you try to keep him in his cot rather than bring him into bed? Did you sort of manage to sleep through some of the feeds if you know what I mean? I have never managed the feeding on my side thing so co-sleeping never really offered any benefits, DS usually comes into bed about 5ish still though but I can never sleep properly when he's there and I definitely noticed he tends to feed more if he is next to me - also when DH settled him at 10 last night he didn't need a feed to go back down whereas I'm sure he wouldn't have settled for me. I know I should try to be stricter as half of these wake-ups he hardly feeds but I don't want to leave him to cry and he just keeps rooting if I try to rock him instead, then I think ohmaybe he's hungry after all but then he has a couple of sips and goes back to sleep.

[WeAreBorg]

muser for some reason I didn't see your second post and have repeated what you've said. Have we all morphed into the same person?
Maybe if things are no better in a week we should form a no-feeding club and be tough. No doubt I'd cave at the first wake up though. I can never be 100% sure he's not hungry I suppose.

Although I'm sure by next week we'll be on the "oh no my baby sleeps too much at night and now my boobs hurt and I feel far too awake in the day" thread.

[Muser]

I think my daughter might actual be hungry, she certainly does a proper 15 mins a side feed. I keep thinking if it was just to get back to sleep surely she wouldn't need both sides?

WeAreBorg clearly your username is having an effect! We have hive mind.

[brownrabbit]

Hi everyone, and sorry to hear nights are getting worse not better... I've been away a couple of days, and had one bad night and one better one. Last night (better!) she actually had a 1-5am stint, which would've been amazing had I not woken up constantly wondering what was going on. Grrrrr.

Bet we've got Diprobase on prescription for eczema. Works brilliantly (for the skin - does nothing for the sleep!). And swimming definitely zonks her out, though more in the daytime than at night. Maybe an evening swim?!

Spoke to health visitor / breastfeeding counsellor, whose advice for what it's worth was:

• is she getting enough food during the day? (Possibly not, she mucks around a lot at the breast). If she has a bad (fidgety, on/off) feed, offer again from the same side within an hour, rather than changing sides, so that she gets more hind milk.
  

• keep diary of feeding / sleeping to see if we can spot a pattern
  

• move cot further away from bed (not possible) or ultimately into another room! Am leaning towards this...
  

• hot weather's gonna make it worse as she will just need to drink more.
  

I've also decided to ditch the dummy in the middle of the night (still use it to help her get to sleep) as it only falls out every 5 mins and wakes her up. And have been having some success with long drawn out sssssshhhhhhh-ing plus hand-holding as an alternative soothing method.

Anyway, way past my bedtime, off to get some sleep ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

[Bet01]

Morning all.
Borg The feeding on side thing did take a bit of practice, and you sort of have to put your nipple in their mouth and hold your boob in position but I still find it easier than sitting up. DS does have cream for his eczema but I'm going back to the doc's today because I don't think it's working.
Muser, when my DS started this regression he was definitely hungry every time too, but the more it's gone on the more he just nibbles for a minute and goes back to sleep. I wouldn't have done anything differently though because if I don't feed him he does cry, after getting more and more restless first.
Rabbit your HV is a darn sight more useful than mine. The bf advice is really useful, will definitely try that.
How was everyone's night? Ours was the same really: sleep 10.15 to 11.45pm, then awake every hour, then 5am-7.15am. I feel ok today weirdly; so beyond tired I'm immune to it now!

[WeAreBorg]

Hello all,
muser yes does sound like proper feeds from what you've said.
Rabbit thanks for HV advice, mine is nice but just seemed horrified that we weren't in a routine and sleeping through by 6 weeks!
Bet your night sounds awful, I know what you mean about feeling okay, it's strange isn't it. Things were getting a bit better last week, I really hope this regression isn't like the double dip recession with another crap bit for us all. Please no!

We did well, I was looking at the older posts and we are miles better than a few weeks back. He did 720-130 (!!!!), then 430. Was rubbish after that, woke up every 20mins for a bit then woke for a large poo at 530 and didn't want to go back to sleep until 9am, and then for only 20mins. But was so impressed with the first bit I sort of forgave him.

chop was it you with a long naps, DS is completely the opposite he just doesn't want to sleep in the day. I spend all day walking the streets with the pram now, bit concerned as when he was really bad (every30mins some nights) his daytime sleep was a disaster and I think we sort of reset things with long naps on holiday. Not sure whether just to hire a camper van and tour Europe??

[WeAreBorg]

rabbit we moved DS into own room last week, I miss him but I was waking up at all his snifflings and it was getting ridiculous. I think he is less disturbed, he still often comes into our bed though in morning. I still heard his mega-poo this morning though!

[Muser]

Morning all. Last night was worse than normal. 8.30, 10.30, 12.30, 2.30 - awake for an hour, sometime around 6 I think, I couldn't look. I started seriously considering moving her into her own room at 3am. But we are a bit lacking in space.

[ChopMonster]

Borg yea DS takes long naps now - he just started doing it, which is just as well since I nearly had a breakdown when he was 8 weeks or so as I'd spend hours rocking, pramming etc just to get him to take 20 minutes. Only now I think he's gone too far the other way. Yesterday he napped 7-9, 10.30-1.30, 2.30-3.30 and 530-6.30. Bed at 9, woke at 10, fed, but then stayed awake. Code brown and feed at midnight, he went quiet at 12.30, woke at 1 crying but I resettled without a feed. Woke at 4 for a feed and up at 7 for the day.

It's a vicious cycle because now he'll nap loooads today. It's annoying that he can barely stay awake an hour in the day but as the day goes on, he's awake longer and then come night time it's like someone flipped a switch in him. I might post a separate topic on this because I'm not sure what to do! Although I know people would kill for a baby that naps so don't want to annoy anyone.

Really sorry everyone's nights were rubbish. Was it a full moon?

[Bet01]

Chop, my DS has started to nap alot in the day too. Not quite as much as yours but still a good 2 hours in the morning (prob. Still knackered from all that sleep he didn't have in the night). I don't think it's affecting him at the moment though, and also I'm guessing if you tried to keep your DC awake you'd just get a very grouchy baby.
Just got back from doc's for DS' eczema and she said 'he's ebf is he? Wow, he's big too, you must be feeding him 24/7'. Yep. That's about right.

[Bet01]

Morning all, dare I ask how your nights were?
At last, I have some brilliant news. DS slept from 10pm-3am, then woke at 4.30am, 6.30am, and 9.15am. Brilliant. Did absolutely nothing differently, just completely down to him.
I'm not going to say things are definitely getting better yet though. I feel so well rested today, its great just to have one good night!

[brownrabbit]

That's great Bet. Long may it last! (Or at least one more night...). We've had a couple of better nights too. We're away at the moment, and the cot's much further from the bed, so that's my current theory. Will see how we go when we get back. Though it's a shame that moving into own room hasn't done much for you, Borg. Can't believe your HV thought they should be sleeping through by 6 weeks! Ours is really good - she's said she'll ring me mid-week to talk through the sleeping / feeding diary and see if we can see any patterns. Sounds like we're really lucky on that front.

Have also had a couple of days where baby's napped really badly, cos we've been out and about. Means she's really grouchy during the day (had a 4 hour screaming car journey yesterday!) but sleeps better at night. Think on balance I'd rather she was happier in the day, but would be nice to have both! ah well, I'm at least feeling vaguely more human today.

[WeAreBorg]

Great news bet and rabbit, yes I think they'll just sort themselves out. I keep trying to "do" things but the babies just randomly do whatever. You can have a great textbook day and the night will be rubbish and vice versa.

We are still doing well (for us), similar pattern, with 7-140 (getting longer...), then 440, then up for the day at 6am. DS is lovely during the day too.

[Muser]

Glad there's some good nights happening, gives me hope. No change here. Bedtime took forever, she kept waking up again. Ended up giving her some calpol as she was screaming so much we thought maybe there was some teething happening. It calmed her down anyway.

[Bet01]

Morning all. Borg sounds like things are going really well. Long may it last.
Muser poor you, it's awful enough having no sleep without added crying. If Calpol helped maybe it's wind?
Our night wasn't so great, dammit. Bed at 10, awake at 12.30, 1.45, then a good stint until 5am. 5am-7.30am was in bed snacking and wriggling with little sleep, and then sleep until 9am. The weird thing is he's getting up later and later because he spends so much time awake snacking in the early hours.
We tried him again with porridge and banana yesterday and he really loved it, so maybe it's time for some more regular solids.
Sigh...

[WeAreBorg]

Oh muser were things any better last night? DS had never cried in the night, I think because I always went to him straightaway when I heard his little noises (probably why we are in this mess now!), but when he was waking every 45mins and crying too I just didn't know what to do, was really awful
We are def improving but last night wasn't so great, put DS to bed late due to MIL failing to take the hint that it was bedtime, and he woke at 1030, 1140, 2?, then 5, DH rocked him to sleep and he made it till 7. Not bad really all things considered but I was so cross that bedtime got messed up. We normally start putting him to bed now but he has just had a nap so everything's out of synch. In laws!!
Bet not as good as 10-3 but he can do it! I'm hoping they'll do the odd long stretch then hopefully they'll get more frequent?
Naps still useless, he did an hour in cot this morning (rocked to sleep-seemed terrified to settle himself), then about 10mins in pram at lunch, another 30mins or so just now. He just doesn't seem to need any sleep!