4 month sleep regression- light at the end of the tunnel

[nearlymumofone]

I posted here a while back about the hell i was goig through with the 4 month sleep regression. And it really was hell. However I've been meaning to post here to let anyone going through it know there is light at the end of the tunnel. DS hit it at 16 weeks, and it lasted till 6 months, with the worst weeks being form 16-20 weeks. I was EBF at the time and I think this actually didn't help the sleep sitruation, at 5 months i introduced solids and a bottle, he was established on solids by 6 months and ff and slept through the night without waking. I can't tell whether the formula or solids helped, whether it was either or both, but his sleeping well coincided with him being well satisfied and full (he was very poor at bf and not gaining weight so it wasn't going well at hence i gave in at 5 months). We also introduced a blankie which was a godsend and put him in his own room. All of which seemed to positively contribute to him sleeping well. Maybe the regression would have passed without us doing these things, however they seemed to work well for us. Now DS is 9 months and unless he's ill/teething sleeps through the night (from 6.30-6.30 ish).

I just wanted to give hope to anyone going through it at the minute that it will get better.

Glad you had a slightly better night, I shouldn't clock watch so much it's depressing. He did 730-930, then 12, 3, 430, then not sure after that. The 12-3 was nice though, that's better than it has been, and we stayed in bed until 7 - I played white noise (have tried this before and it didn't work but this time stuck it right next to his ear at the highest volume and he settled in seconds. Tried it when he woke up early from his lunchtime nap but didn't work. Really hope it's not a one-off!). He has been totally off his food today though, I think I stuffed him last night, I think he has decided night feeding is the way forward, less distractions! Maybe weaning would help this, but I think DS would be the same as yours, he doesn't seem interested at the moment.

Am trying to put him to bed earlier, with the thought that he is really overtired. He has been screaming the house down before naps these days, have to pram them all now. I think I may have lost a kilo though!

We're on hols from tomorrow until friday so won't be able to post, really hope things improve this week, will try to check in friday/sat to see how you've been

Borg and Apple, I know you're both away (getting some sleep hopefully) but thought I'd post anyway. DS is getting slightly better I think. Last night we failed to get him in his cot but he slept 10-1am, then woke again at 2, 3, 4.45 and 6.45am. So there's a 3 hour stint and a 2 hour stint in there. Overall better.
Weirdly, we both went for a nap at 9am, I got up at 11am, but I fed him on the bed and he's still asleep now at midday! A three hour nap is the longest he's had for weeks and weeks. Not sure what it means for sleep tonight though!

Hi all, hope you're getting some sleep whilst away Borg and apple. I've had Mumsnet open every day this week but never got further than the home page. Bad week! He slept through last week after his jabs (although he stirred at his usual feeding times which woke me up and since it's so light these days I couldn't get back to sleep!) We were down to 2 wake ups but it's gone downhill again.

He's now introduced a pre-midnight wake up. He then wakes at 2, 5 and 7 give or take 30 minutes. Except last night it was 11, 2, 5, 6.30, 7.20, up at 8. Left him chatting for 20 minutes so I could come round.

Am having BF issues too, he's been refusing feeds and getting really upset with it. He's finally pooed after 11 days so that's something. I have to express to get my let down going now before feeds or he gets impatient and just cries. He didn't feed at all on Saturday. He's going 3-4 hours now instead of 2, but doesn't seem to be able to go this long at night FFS.

When does this end?!

Cracking nap Bet. Hopefully it won't affect tonight's sleep for you :)

Oh Chop you poor thing. Even worse to think it's getting better and then for it to go downhill again. I guess all we can really do is give it time, and post on here when it all gets a bit overwhelming. Also, keep thinking of new cunning tactics to try and help.
I was thinking this morning that maybe DS is eating so much at night because I feed him on my side and he's not latching correctly. So my plan tonight is to feed him sitting up properly and see if that helps. Worth a shot.
I also don't think DS sleeps as many hours in a day as he should, and maybe he's frequently overtired. Usually he'll nap 2 hours in the morning and probably another 2 altogether before bedtime at 10pm. Given that he only sleeps about 7 hours overnight that means only 11 hours a day. I think they're meant to have 16. So perhaps tonight given his massive nap he might sleep better. Who the hell knows!!

Just posting for anyone interested (not sure who's watching the thread at the moment!) I think after 16 days things are slowly improving. Despite Ds's mammoth 3 hour nap yesterday he still went 9.30pm-1am, then woke at 2.30, 3.30, 5.45, and up at 7.15 for the day. He seems to gradually be filling in some of the feeds and extending his first stint again.
Still trying to get him back in his cot, which is literally attached to the side of our bed, but still too far away for him. I put him in his cot at 1.30am after his first feed and he stayed there for an hour but was much more restless than when right next to me.
So it seems like DP and I will have to put our sex life on hold until we can get DS out of our bed! Sigh...

Hello, we're back from our hols. Chop sorry to see you're having problems, hope the feeding has improved, is he any better now? Impressive that he slept through though, at least it shows he can do it. Unlike my little tinker!
Bet how are things? Is the overtired theory the key do you think? My DS certainly is happier in the day with more sleep.

Well am happy to report a bit of an improvement, not sure what it was that did it though as so many different things to usual on holiday. He managed a 720-1am stint one night, one night was 3 hourly, and last night (only night I can remember exact times) he did 8-1030, then 130, 330, then 730! People I know probably think that's crap but the post 3am bit is usually when he wakes pretty much hourly so that was amazing. He also stayed in his cot for the whole night last night. I feel loads better but don't want to get my hopes up too much.....
We actually managed to forget the adaptors for the car seat bit for the pram so my sole method of getting him to sleep was gone! He did manage naps in bed (our bed but once with me not lying next to him) so hopefully that will continue too

Trying to think what it was - was I happier and more relaxed so he was better? Naps were much longer as we were driving quite a bit so maybe that? Lots of activities in the day?? Country air???

Well he was in his own room for the first time ever as no room for cot in that bedroom, and seemed fine in it. I think we disturbed him less and I slept through his twitterings which I would usually wake up for. I'm trying him in his own room tonight at home, so have the luxury of MNing in bed with a bag of crisps! I'm used to the crushing disappointment of a good night followed by a rubbish one so still going to go to bed at 9pm in anticipation.....he's 19 weeks on Sunday so we can't be out of the woods yet

Forgot to say good luck for tonight girls

Welcome back Borg! Sounds like lots of really positive stuff happening. Sometimes when you're out of your normal environment and are forced to do things differently you get interesting results.
Like you, I've been napping on the bed with DS for the past few days which is working really well. His sleep is getting better, gradually. He's filling in some of the gaps so we're now getting about 3/4 wakings a night rather than so many I lost count!
His nap schedule is changing a bit though, and his last nap is now 8.15pm to 9pm. This means his bedtime is going to have to get even later, which is a pain because it's late anyway. But he's just not ready for his long sleep any earlier.
Never mind, fingers crossed for tonight.

Hi all.. so happy its getting better for everyone :) we are officially out the other side. I think it was about 25 days in total. DS now goes...wait for it... 7/7.30pm - 5.30/6am with only one night feed at about 11. It's so much better. I really hope thats the worst regression out of the way, I seriously don't think I can do that again. Hope everyone has a good night tonight.

Apple that's fantastic! Really pleased for you.

Borg that sounds good to me! Anything less than a 3 hour gap between wakings leaves me feeling like death.

Bet my DS is still going to be quite late too but as long as it's before my bedtime I don't mind too much. Hell, I'd stay up til midnight if he slept til 6!

We had a good night last night. He woke at 9.30 so I fed him and he slept til 2.50 and then 6.30, when he got up for the day! I'm a bit worried it was the glass of wine I had, first one since I got pregnant (pretty much a year ago!). Today has been weird, he seems to be trying to be awake longer between naps. He normally stays awake an hour. Now he's moaning after an hour but when we put him down he gets all excited for 30 minutes. But if we try to play with him or even cuddle for those 30 minutes he gets very grumpy! So we've been leaving him to chat in his cot. He managed nearly 2 hours awake and playing before bed this evening!

Feeding not totally resolved, he refused a bedtime feed tonight. But it's better than it was. Part of me wants to use the opportunity to get him to take formula so that I have a little more freedom and to make it easier when I go back to work. I have a plugged duct that won't clear and it's really painful. So not helped by him skipping feeds!

I hope they all start coming through this soon. It's been about 4 weeks here. Hopefully not too much longer to go. Hope everyone has a good night. I've got money on a pre midnight wake up since he refused bedtime feed. Where's that wine...

Congratulations Apple, that's brilliant, so pleased for you.
Chop glad things are improving, am sure the wine would have left your system within an hour and if you fed him before then the amount would be tiny plus the health visitor reckons it's fine
Bet did the change in feeding position help?
Well I know I said I was not going to get my hopes up but I did in fact get my hopes up and he was a bit rubbish last night - not back to square one, he did 8, 10, 130, 4, 530-6, then 7 but not bad and the 10-4 bit was near continuous sleep for me. DH is planning to give him a bottle again tonight (has only ever resulted in him taking about 20mls then screaming until he passes out so hoping it's not such a drama tonight).

Hi everyone, Apple that's fantastic news! Our DS's seemed so similar in their schedules before and during the regression that hopefully mine will follow suit!
Borg, the change in position didn't seem to make any difference, neither does how much he naps/doesn't nap. I think it's really all down to him and outside influences make no difference. Sorry your night wasn't great. We've had one like that on Friday night-not back to square one but not as good as normal.
It seems to be very gradually improving for us: bed is usually at 10pm and he can now settle in his cot with a bit of patting (not being fed to sleep-brilliant!) then he wakes at 12, quick feed, wake at 3.15, 5.15, 7.15 and then doze til 8am. So not brilliant but I can cope with it. We're on day 20 now so hopefully not too long to go.
Keeping fingers crossed for tonight!

Hiya, I've found a couple of old 4month nightmare type threads that were really old so it's nice to see a fairly recent one too!

my ds is now 21 weeks and slept through last night for the 2nd time since he was born . dreamfeed at 10ish but was hardly anything then he was awake at 6:30 but didn't grizzle for a feed till nearly 7am. he'd had loads of really good/big feeds during the day so i had a feeling he might, not fed as well today so am expecting a couple of wake ups. am ebf and hoping to hang on for another few weeks for solids - did nothing for my other 2 babies sleeping so i know it won't make any difference with this one either.

he is my 3rd and ds1's 4month spell lasted at least a month and really was a nightmare so this one doesn't seem to have been as bad.

going to try and get an early-ish night, there aren't enough hours in the day though!

Hello natural, that's great news about your DS (they really do seem to all be boys don't they?), I hope last night was just as good. It's good to know folk are coming out of this.
Bet well done on the patting to sleep. We (meaning DH) messed up bedtime last night and he was really overtired so I just fed him to sleep in the end. He did do 730 till 1, then 4, 530 then a bit rubbish but managed to stay in bed till 8. So definitely better.
For some reason the nights he is fed to sleep he seems to do better than the ones he goes off by himself. Same with (maybe coincidence) night wake-ups if he goes straight back down after a feed he seems to do longer than say if I change his nappy then put him down to go to sleep himself? Any idea why that might be? I would have thought it would be the other way around?
Anyway, hope tonight is good for all of us!

Wow Borg, there were some good long stints of sleep there. Brilliant news.
I'm not sure about the feeding/not feeding to sleep thing. I haven't noticed any difference with DS. I'm not even sure why I'm against feeding to sleep really, perhaps because at some point I'd like DP to be able to put him to bed I guess!
Last night was pretty good (well, considering!) in cot at 9.30-12.30, quick feed then in bed with us 'til 4am, then woke at 5am and fidgeted until 7am with a lot of feeding. The morning part wasn't great but we got two 3 hour stints.
The thing that's really making a difference is the morning nap from 9-11am. I feed him to sleep and zonk for another 2 hours.
Sounds like things are slowly improving for all of us. Sometimes I read threads saying 'how can I get my 5 month old to stop waking once at 3am for a feed?' and I feel like saying 'ha, you don't know you're ruddy born!'

I found the same thing about feeding to sleep Borg. I've been following bits of gina ford and she says change nappy after a feed at 10pm to wake them up enough to feed more but ds just gets really grumpy, refuses to feed more then shuffles about trying to get back to sleep for ages! last week he was also feeding much better in the middle of the night when still half asleep then hardly feeding in the day so i tried to cut down the night feeds as much as possible which is why i think he slept through the other night.

He's been really good at self settling cause he's my 3rd and i've struggled with my other 2 self settling so have always put him down on his own and left him, but today he's been hysterical and wanting feeding to sleep all day which is strange. when i do want to cuddle him to sleep he's having none of it but when i want to get him self settling again then he doesn't want to be put down!

how are things Chop? blocked duct sounds painful!

Late joiner here... I mainly wanted to say that it's really nice to hear some positive words about improvements, even if they are gradual! I keep finding threads which say "mine still does that at 2 and a half years", and I don't think I can hold out that long. Am going to start trying all your tips! My 15 week old daughter has been on a definite regression for the last week, and last night was the worst - I fed at 9 and 12.20, then was up at 1.45, 2.30, 2.45, 3.45, 4.40, 5, 5.30 and 6. Isn't it sad that I know that?! Am becomning obsessed...

Oh natural sounds as though you are an expert with all this! Is your DS still sleeping through?

We had a similar night to last night except he also woke at 10 but hardly fed so I don't really think he needs to wake up then (I have told him this so let's see if he listens!). This morning I just gave in and fed him at 530 rather than faff on trying to resettle him, and he did well till 7 (n our bed of course). Wondering if tonight I should just put him in our bed at 4am (that's if he is still following this pattern) and see if he skips the 530. I don't think he needs this one either and have also told him but typical boy doesn't listen !

Really hoping that this pattern continues, it's so much better than before at least it's a bit more predictable, can't believe I am excited about getting 2 blocks of 3 hours sleep!

Just wondered, Bet and the others are your babies quite alert? DS is very nosy, tries not to nap if he can avoid it, and prefers looking round and chatting rather than feeding which is why I think he feeds at night all the time?! I've noticed the babies that seem to have avoided this regression and have slept through for ages seem a bit more placid if that makes sense?

Borg Yes, DS is pretty alert. When he was a bit younger he wouldn't let me put him down at all, he's always preferred to be held so he can look around. He also looks around if DP talks while he's feeding, or he hears a noise. I think you're right, he's not eating as much in the day as he used to. I suppose feeding in a quiet room might help?
We're now on a 3 hour/3 hour/anyone's guess routine like you Borg. Doesn't seem to be getting any better but not worse either. DS can also settle in his cot now but only stays there for the first 3 hours.
Rabbit it's very hard isn't it? If it's any consolation I only had a max of 5 nights that were as bad as that, and although they're still not great I can at least cope with 6-ish hours a night.
Don't think this heat is helping anyone either!

don't feel like an expert but can write and talk about the right stuff! my perfectly contended gina ford routine baby has turned into a 'carry & feed me all day' baby! i was half thinking of getting rid of the dummy and he's done it himself deciding that boob is best for sleeping so instead of a nice 2hr lunch time sleep he wakes 2 or 3 times heartbroken that he isn't in my arms with boob in mouth.

sleeping through was a one off, i'm not expecting it again till 7months if i'm v.lucky based on what i went through with my older 2. i find it strange that people with more than one baby/child have such different babies - mine are all exactly the same!

Oh hello rabbit must have cross posted and missed you. Like Bet I think (forgetting terrible memory) we had about 5 nights max of absolutely awful 30mins to 1 hour wake ups, it then went to about 1-2 hourly, and tada!! now on 3 hourly ish. I don't think the really terrible bit lasts too long if that helps?
Bet yes that sounds very similar to DS. DH thinks that DS is constantly frustrated by his puny body and can't switch off from all the nosying he has been doing all day, I suppose that's a better theory than my son is just a rubbish sleeper, I like to think it's because his mind is active

Can't believe I have just posted something that indicates I think I am over the worst of it, I have surely jinxed this for tonight.....

Borg hope you're not jinxed for tonight. And I'll keep my fingers crossed that there's light at the end of the tunnel. DD has been exhausted all day (as have I!) so I'm hoping for a better night tonight. Amazing how we manage to stay vaguely optimistic in the face of it all! Good luck all for lots of zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

Welcome to the fun brownrabbit, poor you, that night sounds horrific. We had a few nights of that but it has improved since then so hopefully you won't get too many more of those.

I got all excited last week as DS did 3 nights in a row of waking at 9.30/10 and then sleeping til 3/4, then not waking until 6.30/7 for the day. It was amazing! Not having that fussy period around 5 really makes a difference. He's gone back to 3 hourly now which isn't too bad. Although he seems to have adopted 4am as "have a chat for 30 minutes". He's changed from 2 hourly to 3 hourly during the day too.

Blocked duct is finally just starting to clear today. It was so painful and has been here so long I was starting to think it was a permanent feature!

natural I really hope none of us have to wait until 7 months for a full night's sleep!

Bet and Borg your DSs sound like mine, he spends all day being very frustrated that he can't roll, sit or stand yet and is always nosying round during feeds. He can be on the verge of sleep and as soon as we put him in his cot he goes mad, kicking and smiling!

Hello all. Hope rabbit had a better night, I know what you mean about the blind optimism, every night I think, maybe this is the one and is never is...sigh. Keeps me going though, just think if they all slept through we'd get used to it and be cross when they wake for ONE feed .

chop glad feeding issues are a bit better, those nights sounds great, hopefully he'll get back to that.

Slightly annoyed this morning, we had a lovely day yesterday - perfect naps, went to bed just the right side of tired and drifted off himself in his cot. Shuffled about at his usual 10pm wake up time then went back to sleep so I thought great, sleep! DH then woke me getting into bed, DS then woke at 11, then 130. Lovely spell till 5 though but then took till 6 until he went back to sleep only for another 45mins. Grrr. Not bad overall, and must remember hourly wakings and NEVER to complain when there is a 130-5 spell!