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See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

Daily Mail thread 5

243 replies

madameDefarge · 05/09/2009 21:06

and a sticky? pretty please?

OP posts:
Crapweasel · 05/09/2009 21:08

Thread 5? FIVE?

I suppose it's a bit late to ask for a precis?

MoochieHomma · 05/09/2009 21:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster
madameDefarge · 05/09/2009 21:21

Crapweasel. aaaaggghhhh!

OP posts:
AitchwonderswhoFruitCrumbleis · 05/09/2009 21:25
oopsagainandagain · 05/09/2009 21:40

Weasel being another indiginous mammal

I am aware that I was rude about MP earlier, I've apologised.

And I'm cross with MN, and do you know what, I'm still cross with MN.

PW and Aitch... I am only human and I do bear a grudge.

I sepnt 4 traumatic days going through ALL of my old posts regarding some very veyr awful things that happened in my life and i'd posted on here.
I accept now that it was foolish of me to poast about such topics.... but we all learn our lesson, some sooner, some later.

I was told that I was paranoid and I do remember being quite hurt by an number of comments- and nobdy thus far has apologised to me

And I spent 2 nights in tears reliving cdertain things that happened in my life and i'd posted on here.

MN deleted it post by post and refused for 4 days to just take all of my history and make it easy on me.

I was up late at night and totally distraught.
And they knew it.

And they just kept asking me to wait until they had made a decision on whehter or not they felt I had a case for deleting my past history en masse.

I felt I did as it was affecting me mentally- and was incredibly uspetting.
Not jsut your usual upset, i was a nervous wreck. And i told them this.......

I can show you our correspondence if you like....but i shan't on here...

I am very very cross tbh.
and I am also cross that you think some people bear a petty grudge and are being mean.

I'm hurt and feel very let down on a personal level.
I'm sorry if MP felt attacked by me, but at this point I apologised to her as I am actually a very very reasoble person.

I have recieved no apology for rudenss that was aimed at me (expcet from one person who knows who she is!).

wotzyRegisteredTM · 05/09/2009 21:42

Reminded of Ben Faith, Blind Faith. Where do we go from here?

Original poster
madameDefarge · 05/09/2009 21:45

oops. I'm so sorry all of this has caused you such unhappiness. Its not fair.

OP posts:
Original poster
madameDefarge · 05/09/2009 21:46

I suppose we wait for the result of the poll.

OP posts:
wotzyRegisteredTM · 05/09/2009 21:47

Sorry that was meant to be Ben Elton.

wotzyRegisteredTM · 05/09/2009 21:51

oopsagainandagain I would hope that MNHQ would remove such a request for whatever reason.

It makes sense.

I'm not sure I like the ethos of MN, ATM. But I am glad I have taken part, because my postings have changed since joining, knowing what I now know about copyright and who owns what and who can publish what. I can also advise my children about forums and how to post and what to say and what not to say and what to expect.

AitchwonderswhoFruitCrumbleis · 05/09/2009 22:25

oops, sweetheart, i'm not sure how much clearer i can be, i was only talking to people using a new name. you're not, are you? you're oops. i think everyone should be free to say what they want, but i just think it's more honest to do it up front and using a name that you will be recognised with.
sorry to hear you've had a rough time with MNHQ, i personally think that we should be able to edit our posts Just Because We Want To, without having to ask MNHQ as if we're naughty schoolchildren.

Original poster
madameDefarge · 05/09/2009 22:36

Thinking about the whole archive thing, god knows there are enough repeats going on, why keep stuff if people want to delete?

I do think MN should think about acceding to all requests for deletions. There is enough guff on here to fill in the blanks for using for new MN publications. Otherwise its just keeping threads for the sake of it. Maybe everything should be like chat, only around for 90 days.

OP posts:
oopsagainandagain · 05/09/2009 23:01

i've been banging on about this for weeks now and MN have given us no decision.

I'm bored of it quite frankly.

I get what i needed done after having a very distressing time.
I hope MNHQ have reaslised that this is not the best way to help people who hav used their site over the years.
They have remained silent about the archives and how they amy be plundered and what might happen to old posts.
To me, this is more improtant than if the DM can have some copy and who will wirte it if it is in house....

And shame on the people who were scathing to me about it on here.

And I've always posted under my own name unless it was something distressing to me or for a laugh.

Crapweasel · 05/09/2009 23:07

Oops, I lost track of the DM thread around v.3 so not sure about the indiginous mammal comment. Not sure what that's all about but just to say that I'm a completely innocent weasel - was just messing about re the precis thing

oopsagainandagain · 05/09/2009 23:09

They will delete individual posts and I've had a few deleted prior to this.
I am aware that some people have had their request denied on individual posts.

Some posters have had all of their history deleted prior to this, and others were denied that when asked.

I begged and begged for 4 days to have my history deleted, to save me ahving to go through and relive all of the stuff that was behind me as a person.

MNHQ
JustineMumsnet · 05/09/2009 23:14

Evening all.
Just looking in and thought I'd respond to Oops' point.
Our policy wrt to mass deletions generally is to ask if there are particular posts that are problematic rather than deleting the whole lot. This has always been our policy because mass deletions can leaving gaping holes on the boards, which can make it very difficult to follow past threads - often full of good advice and well worth keeping. One of the bugbears of more than a few oldies is newbies constantly asking the same questions and not using search - well search has to work for that to happen properly and it won't if there are loads of gaps in threads.

Of course if there are circumstances where someone feels very threatened, by an ex-partner for example we are always happy to help and indeed if someone comes back to us and says look - this is seriously effecting my well-being - as I think you did - we will of course delete everything - we're here to make people's lives easier.

In by far the majority of cases, though, the member is happy to report the posts that are or could be problematic and we delete them as quickly as possible.

I wasn't here for much of the correspondence you mention Oops and I haven't read it but I'd be very surprised if the way we handled it differed markedly from what I've just outlined and I think this is a sensible policy that works for the community in general. Clearly you feel let down, however, and I'm sorry I'm sorry you've been upset.

I strongly disagree that it would be better if folks could edit their own posts (as Aitch suggests). That would mean folks could re-write history, which would be very confusing and potentially explosive all round.

(Webdude very quickly in response to an earlier point of yours - slight misunderstanding I think - when I said "Oops the poll is still open" in the earlier thread I was talking to Oops (who thought the poll had shut), not saying "by jimmeny the poll is still open iyswim". Probably my bad grammar.)

bibbitybobbityhat · 05/09/2009 23:16

lurk

brokenspacebar · 05/09/2009 23:23

where is the poll?

AitchwonderswhoFruitCrumbleis · 05/09/2009 23:25

see, i just completely disagree wrt editing, justine. i think that if 'oldies' are moaning about newbies not using the archives they should be told to fuck right off by everyone concerned. this is not a library, this is a chatroom, a living breathing thing. there is just no reason for most of the archive to exist.

and as for the immediate editing, in fact from what i've seen on other forums, it actually stops fights etc because it reads 'edited to say' and then 'shit i just realised that it looks like i'm saying x but i am actually saying y' and it would stop all those hideous threads on here where some poor bastard gets jumped on, then apologises and then is continuously jumped all over by hundreds of posters reading the OP and not reading the apology.

sorry Justine, i've no idea why you're so wedded to not letting us have that degree of autonomy, tbh. it's a bit weird if you ask me.

MNHQ
JustineMumsnet · 05/09/2009 23:25

Poll is here or look in MN latest box to your right.

Original poster
madameDefarge · 05/09/2009 23:27

The problem with this whole Daily Mail saga is that is has stripped away all the fluffiness of Mn and forced us all to look at the reality of our relationship with MN, with Mns values, beliefs, ambitions.And the threats that MN as an internet business face.

These things do not always sit happily together, but until an external force challenged it, we could always continue with the sense of being private within a unique community. Our challenge now is to try and salvage that sense of belonging, while resolving or challenging the inequities and issues thrown up.

I think we can do it, but it has to be from both sides, both users and MN forum providers. where MN recognise the value of the content provided for them and the business it provides them, and for the users to understand that everyone in the internet forum world are making it up as they go along in this new world of technology.

Nobody is the bad guy here, but it has shown that perhaps some clear sighted renegotiation of our engagement with each other is the only way forward, i the long term.

OP posts:
MNHQ
JustineMumsnet · 05/09/2009 23:31

No it's not just a chat room Aitch (though it is that too) - it's an archive of collective wisdom as I see it. An archive that can be very helpful to folks and the raison d'etre of this site is to make parents' lives easier.

Bear in mind lurkers outweigh posters by at least 20 to 1. If it were just a chat room and we kept no archive, MN would cease to be useful for most people who use it.

AitchwonderswhoFruitCrumbleis · 05/09/2009 23:33

nah. i don't buy it, tbh. i lurked on here for ages before posting, but not in the archives, so i was one of your silent majority for yonks. do you have any data on how the archives are used?

AitchwonderswhoFruitCrumbleis · 05/09/2009 23:33

and do you have any thoughts re my second point, that you are plumb wrong about editing making things worse rather than better?

MNHQ
JustineMumsnet · 05/09/2009 23:34

Search is our second most popular page on the site - after active conversations. About 1.5 million searches per month.