FWR

[MarsScarlet]

FYI: I've name changed for this to avoid a pile-on.

This post is about the overwhelming negativity and hostility with the FWR board that new posters and posters with a differing viewpoint face if they attempt to use the board.

There is a persistent group within the board that are, to put it simply, hateful towards others. Despite posting there on and off for more than 4 years, I have never felt welcome, despite not holding any particular extreme views or being abusive to others. Without exception, I am accused of being another poster, or a man, a TRA, or some kind of paid activist. This occurs again and again until I leave a thread in frustration.

I’ve seen this happen to many other new posters. Few return. Why would they? Such an acidic atmosphere doesn’t encourage healthy discussion. I’d just like to discuss women’s rights, but this board makes discussion impossible.

I’m not exactly sure what the answer is, except for @MNHQ to request the board to tone down the rhetoric a bit and back off on any new names they may see on the board. Let people engage with you rather than actively drive them away.

I read the 'I apologise' as being said in the tone used by a toddler when it's been explained that stealing Tommy's toy truck and bashing him with it isn't very nice and you, Janet, need to go and say sorry.

Over stomps Janet to the weeping Tommy, and bellows 'SORRY-UH' before stomping back, kicking the toy truck on the way.

As insincere, in other words. But that's the problem with tone on the Internet.

Disagreeing, and backing up that disagreement with evidence, stats and case studies that wipe the floor with the person you are counter debating with is bullying now is it? I'd ask for evidence but as we've seen, that's never forth coming from the 'you're all big bad transphobes' brigade is it? See the ploppers are still plopping.

Christ, some people really need to stay off the internet, and discussion forums.

I'd also advise a career in Law isn't for you either.

Well yes - my mum always said that "I'm sorry, but..." wasn't an apology, it was an excuse.

Who wants to debate with people who's goal is to wipe the floor with them?

Christ life has enough negativity without this shit.

I disagree. YOU decided to insult some posters by calling out their feminine/masculine tones on a thread about civility and politeness. If YOU cannot explain what YOU mean by YOUR words on YOUR thread and then try to stop people asking for clarity then you need to ask yourself whether you are really wanting a civil and unhostile discussion or whether you are deliberately being provocative.

You either stand by what you posted or you don't. Which is it?
It's an excuse to say 'it's our space - we don't have to be feminine there.' Because that's what you're saying isn't it - you've given yourselves the permission to be more male in your response patterns.

Don't you see this is the aggressive style post OP is talking about? I can practically hear the jabbing pointing finger through your post.

When you’re arguing that men can be women and should be allowed into women’s spaces and sports and I’m going to denigrate you if you don’t agree, that viewpoint should be robustly defended. Or wipe the floor with.

Whatever words you prefer. Just my opinion of course.

Sounds more like exasperation to me.

People don't want to 'wipe the floor with them'.

People want to provide evidence to be discussed and work out how other people's interpretations impact their own interpretations. Alternatively it could be to inform someone that they are spreading misinformation, particularly if they have declared an authoritive (in tone) stance that evidence doesn't reflect.

Again, the hypocrisy. Trying to police tone and style that is only acceptable to one side it seems. Nothing is said when aggression is displayed from critics of FWR.

FWR isn’t to discuss knitting and baking cakes, women’s rights to safety, dignity and fairness in sports is pretty fucking important to a lot of women. If someone comes along attempting to belittle and dismantle this and you expect nothing else but a strong response and have the audacity to be surprised and cry bulling then again, discussion forums aren’t for you.

I also agree, it’s exasperation not aggression.

I did just pop over to the Reddit board ref mumsnet, following pp. Curiosity got the better of me. I had to download the app etc.

Anyway from what I could see, it was a few posts of wah wah wah those fwr women are meanies and ‘nasty nasty nasty’ etc.

Lots of I’m a woman (yes of course) and I couldn’t stand that board. They’re so mean and so transphobic.

There was no nuanced debate or detailed discussion with supporting evidence. I was shocked to the core.

I deleted the app. Misogynistic Reddit is not for my fair biological womany eyes 👀 .

There are some reasonably normal posters on that board but it's mostly like a poundshop version of Tattle.

Not many though @Ereshkigalangcleg !

Same. Bleating on about how people have too much time to be on Mumsnet spreading all this transphobia. Whilst being on a forum having a lot of time dedicated to discussing another forum. Even I don't have enough time to do that!

When someone is being slippery and refusing to clarify something they originally used to try to silence others with then yes, I am exasperated and slightly annoyed at it all. Perhaps I channelled too much of the masculine energy OP was talking about but I will never know since she refuses to discuss it further. Perhaps you would like to have a go since you "think" you understand text tone so well? And how should I reword this post to make "fragrant and loving and overflowing with feminine energy" please. I am here to learn

Isn't it the thing that we ALL know each other?

Rather than just getting to know posters from their historic posts on a board. You know, like it would be reasonable to understand would happen. But no, apparently we are either just 6 sock puppets (or is that number 10 now? '10 posters' seem to be a common feature in many of these accusations) or we are all partying together and not including some posters.

We have seen most of these accusations before in some version or another.

I too look forward to seeing this feminine version. It will be very good to know that standard that we shall be held too.

oh.. hang on. Is asking for clarification too male?

I would like to know if men get their post ' tone policed' , and told to be kind and welcoming on their threads ?
Because I can't imagine they are !
Why are women expected to mother the whole world and never think of themselves and their rights.

Most of us have had enough of putting ourselves last and we are entitled to fight for the things we want.

yes, apparently posters are ripe for disparagement about their time spent and the length of their posts. We see it on here often, and I am led to believe that it is a source of discussion on other parts of the internet.

Imagine that!! Women who work strange hours! How the fuck can women do that? It is like the employment revolution never fucking happened.

Honestly Wes, the focus on posters on FWR from public parts of the internet is bizarre behaviour when those same posters hypocritically then judge those FWR posters as being bullies.

It is like self awareness is not their strength.

It's a bit rich when one of them apparently was "bored" and kept a spreadsheet of our names. Whatever floats your boat.

Yes, I'm self-employed, working from home, and if I'm honest, I really don't have to work all that hard to keep things ticking over, so of course I can post whenever I damn well like.

FFS! That is dedicated!

That's one word for it!

It's not normal behaviour, is it?

Reminds me of the kid at school who had a "bully list" comprising of any kid who so much as looked in his direction.

This amazing debating style of yours - the one you seem to be holding in as high regard as a barrister - so far comprises calling other PPs thick and getting your posts deleted.