Page 11 | Moderation Sex Board

onirgellep · 2023-04-13T22:06:31+00:00

Back in February Justine* committed to an urgent review of moderation of the Sex Board subsequent to the considerable concerns mainly arising from the longstanding Sex Chat thread Unsurprisingly, issues continue Would it be possible to have an update on the progress of the review? And hear when do you anticipate it being completed and the new moderation put into action? Thank you *I'm afraid I'm unable to link Justine's post on the thread *References to Underage Sex on the Sex Board* page 13

TheShellBeach · 14/04/2023 19:23

Surplus2requirements · 14/04/2023 19:20

You're gonna hate @DrunkOnLove 's post then

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I understand why the emojis are in that post.

HeartbreakHouse · 14/04/2023 19:23

Amazingly, posters were having trouble finding somewhere willing to host a free hook up chat thread. Why do you think that was?

And if nowhere else wanted it, why do you think mumsnet would?

You would think it may have made them realise that they were the problem, not mumsnet for refusing to host it or the poster who were rightly appalled.

Although I agree with a pp, mumsnet brought this on themselves. Why did they ever think it was ok and that it fitted with the rest of the site. Now it’s resulted in the current debates which are not going to go away. The moderation needs to be sorted.

Theyresexpeoplemn · 14/04/2023 19:27

LangClegsInSpace · 14/04/2023 18:45

To reduce that to people wanking with strangers sounds very judgemental to my ears

I'm cool with that.

😁

HornyBee · 14/04/2023 19:27

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

DrunkOnLove · 14/04/2023 19:29

Surplus2requirements · 14/04/2023 19:20

You're gonna hate @DrunkOnLove 's post then

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I used emojis to laugh at the posters who couldn’t get their heads around the idea that their hook up threads were not wanted anywhere.

The fact that they thought their hook up threads should continue on a parenting site, when they couldn’t find anywhere else on the whole of the internet was quite frankly, fucking hilarious!

horridjobescapee · 14/04/2023 19:31

BenCoopersSupportWren · 14/04/2023 19:18

One of the reasons it would be better to have different, more stringent moderation rules for the Sex board is to protect Mumsnet itself, as the legal entity. It is part of the registration T&Cs that MN own the copyright for anything posted here. If posts or links pertaining to illegal or illicit material are allowed to stand here, there is a risk that MN itself could be held liable of hosting inappropriate material, with all the consequences that flow from that. (I did try to explain some of those risk in the “References to Underaged Sex” thread of which I was the OP, but I’m not sure Justine / MNHQ quite fully grasped the potential extent of their legal liability.)

Of course people / trolls can post links to pornography or similar anywhere on the site, but the nature of the Sex board means it’s more likely something may be posted in good faith by a regular poster - as appears to have been the case here - so it is an occupational hazard arising from the board content.

There is a precedent for different standards of moderation in different parts of the site: we woman of FWR are subjected to tighter controls over the language we can use in our posts than posters elsewhere, including the bear pit of AIBU, and there is a “three strikes and you’re out” banning mechanism in operation there, i.e. if you transgress the special (and somewhat opaque) FWR TG three times within a certain rolling period, you’re banned. I don’t see why a similar policy can’t apply to the Sex Board for anyone who repeatedly tries to get round the “no hook up threads” rules or who persists in posting NSFW links?

I will continue to advocate for tighter registrations to be able to post on the Sex board and for proactive moderation to weed out the creeps, perves and trolls before any damage is done to those who might be triggered by particularly inappropriate posts referring to illegal practices (e.g. CSA, rape, incest etc). I’m no prude, I have used other sex-based sites to enjoy written erotica on a range of sexual topics, and one of the reasons I would continue to use them over MN’s Sex board is precisely because they take their duties as a host of NSFW material much more seriously than is the case here. Strong moderation gives the users of such boards a certain level of protection and security in a variety of ways and should be welcomed by anyone who can see the inherent risks in playing fast and loose with adult-themed material, not resisted.

Brilliant post.

Original poster

onirgellep · 14/04/2023 19:33

HornyBee · 14/04/2023 19:00

I know why it was banned.
We all do.
Because people kicked off about it and demanded mumsnet ban it, which they eventually did.

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IMO what changed Justine's mind wasn't the million and one threads over 2-3 weeks which were fielded by moderators

It was when people started leaving or making plans to leave and talking about cancelling their premium subscription after Justine's first post on the evening of 24th Feb and her volte face on the morning of the 25th

It's all on the thread References to under-age sex on the sex board around page 12

OP posts:

TheBayTreeMurder · 14/04/2023 19:38

MN resisted clamouring calls for a sex board for years. Said they'd never do it because it would attract the wrong type of poster.

They then changed their minds and well, this is where we find ourselves.

Very persistent people who desperately want to be able to collectively wank together on posts, some bloke who insists on turning up on every single thread in site stuff where women are talking, accusing women of bullying and someone who posts links to sites that host teen/ incest chat.

The sensible thing to do is probably scrap the sex forum bit of MN altogether. We managed without it and it's so so obvious that it's attracted some real dross

Clymene · 14/04/2023 19:38

This thread keeps coming up in a five threads and reminds me of a thread I'm on - one about men posting reviews of women's pants on the M&S website.

There are - I'm sure - lots of sites where men who are aroused by wearing women's underwear can post and share their thoughts and reviews of the underwear.

But these men don't want to post in those forums (well, they might but I don't know and don't care about it). There is no reason for them to post their views on how women's underwear fits other than to be aroused at the idea of women reading their reviews. The arousal is about transgressing boundaries.

It feels like the sex board functions in pretty much the same way for a lot of users. And of course that is going to jar with a lot of women.

DrunkOnLove · 14/04/2023 19:43

Clymene · 14/04/2023 19:38

This thread keeps coming up in a five threads and reminds me of a thread I'm on - one about men posting reviews of women's pants on the M&S website.

There are - I'm sure - lots of sites where men who are aroused by wearing women's underwear can post and share their thoughts and reviews of the underwear.

But these men don't want to post in those forums (well, they might but I don't know and don't care about it). There is no reason for them to post their views on how women's underwear fits other than to be aroused at the idea of women reading their reviews. The arousal is about transgressing boundaries.

It feels like the sex board functions in pretty much the same way for a lot of users. And of course that is going to jar with a lot of women.

Yes, I agree. It a big part of it for these men and that’s really concerning. They get off on making women uncomfortable, and these everyday mainstream sites that allow that should be ashamed. We shouldn’t have to deal with their shit on mumsnet or whilst browsing M&S.

LangClegsInSpace · 14/04/2023 19:49

TBF I think there are some women, probably including long term MNers, who like the idea of sexychat but don't want to go on the sex sites because they are full of pervy men.

What they don't appear to get is that by doing it here instead they attract all the pervy men here.

FrosteeFlake · 14/04/2023 19:54

horridjobescapee · 14/04/2023 18:45

Also this.

There are plenty of sites on the internet for flirty saucy sexual talk or messaging.

Why mumsnet?

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This, all day!

Clymene · 14/04/2023 20:06

LangClegsInSpace · 14/04/2023 19:49

TBF I think there are some women, probably including long term MNers, who like the idea of sexychat but don't want to go on the sex sites because they are full of pervy men.

What they don't appear to get is that by doing it here instead they attract all the pervy men here.

I'm sure there are. Perhaps they could start their own board? It doesn't seem to onerous to do. They could send PMs to all the men they know who would be interested. I would even be happy to sponsor an ad on MN directing men to their site.

horridjobescapee · 14/04/2023 20:08

I can't phrase this well so apologies in advance. It's clumsy.

It's boundary pushing of men towards women. And it's making me uncomfortable in the same way that the availability of porn on the internet pushes young women's boundaries sexually.

StraightOuttaContext · 14/04/2023 20:14

Nah, this 24/7 batshittery over wank fodder on literal MUMSNET is not the way to spend life surely?? it's off its head how much people NEED it.

everywhichway · 14/04/2023 20:19

Clymene · 14/04/2023 20:06

I'm sure there are. Perhaps they could start their own board? It doesn't seem to onerous to do. They could send PMs to all the men they know who would be interested. I would even be happy to sponsor an ad on MN directing men to their site.

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I think you'll find there are a lot of women on here who are already happily exchanging PMs with men they like to talk to.

SomethingInTheOrange · 14/04/2023 20:24

No one wants to host their sort of hook up thread for free, and, even if they did find a site for it, being around others who want it, doesn’t fulfil the need of pushing boundaries and making women uncomfortable in the same way it does on mumsnet.

A work colleague uses a site for dating and chat. She has to pay!

That’s why I think they want it on mumsnet.

LangClegsInSpace · 14/04/2023 20:24

everywhichway · 14/04/2023 20:19

I think you'll find there are a lot of women on here who are already happily exchanging PMs with men they like to talk to.

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Yeah, suck it up mummies. The men have arrived for sexytime on what was your site and it's all going on in the PMs so there's fuck all you can do about it hahahaha

SomethingInTheOrange · 14/04/2023 20:25

everywhichway · 14/04/2023 20:19

I think you'll find there are a lot of women on here who are already happily exchanging PMs with men they like to talk to.

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Lots of men pretending to be women potentially. Posters on the sex board warned others of that.

SomethingInTheOrange · 14/04/2023 20:32

LangClegsInSpace · 14/04/2023 20:24

Yeah, suck it up mummies. The men have arrived for sexytime on what was your site and it's all going on in the PMs so there's fuck all you can do about it hahahaha

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They get off on it. Sex chat and hook ups on a parenting site. 😏 Living the dream.

Theyresexpeoplemn · 14/04/2023 20:46

Still, I suppose there's a certain irony that half the sex chat blokes will actually be getting off with men pretending to be women.

Maybebe · 14/04/2023 20:47

TheBayTreeMurder · 14/04/2023 19:38

MN resisted clamouring calls for a sex board for years. Said they'd never do it because it would attract the wrong type of poster.

They then changed their minds and well, this is where we find ourselves.

Very persistent people who desperately want to be able to collectively wank together on posts, some bloke who insists on turning up on every single thread in site stuff where women are talking, accusing women of bullying and someone who posts links to sites that host teen/ incest chat.

The sensible thing to do is probably scrap the sex forum bit of MN altogether. We managed without it and it's so so obvious that it's attracted some real dross

What about the threads on the sex forum genuinely posted by women and genuinely responded to, by women? What about the women who have a problem/concern/issue of a sexual nature and have no one to talk to in read life? What about the mothers who came to know mumsnet through surfing on their phones during the 3am feed who now find themselves in a different phase of their lives and have different questions to ask?
You guys are focusing on the sex chat thread - what about all of the other threads? FGS, not everyone is a bloke!!

I absolutely agree that MNHQ should make robust criteria for posting. I think this would deter a lot of trolls - bring back the 3 months membership before you can post. Stop the ability to post links and images on this board. Those steps make sense but really, stop with the attitude that everyone on the sex board is a man, a perv or both.

TheBayTreeMurder · 14/04/2023 20:51

@Maybebe then let's call it the women's sexual health board or something.

TheBayTreeMurder · 14/04/2023 20:52

everywhichway
I think you'll find there are a lot of women on here who are already happily exchanging PMs with men they like to talk to.

God, how sad is that?

Mermaidparades · 14/04/2023 20:52

Women’s sexual health conjures images of smear tests and STDS