AaaawOOOOOoooOOOOO - It's the Halloween Name Change Competition

[YetARRGHnotherBeckyMumsnet]

Gather round you coven of witches,
For the chance to win some Mumsnet riches,*
As it's that time of year once more,
When (plastic) ravens croak and monsters roar,
And the un-dead climb out from their tomb,
When the night takes on an eerie gloom,
Mumsnetters have but one ambition - to win the Halloween name change competition....

Welcome, you spooky lot, to the 2019 Halloween Name Change Competition.

Enter by posting on this thread under your terrifying new name, which should be a clever play on your usual username.

You have until Monday 28th October to post on this thread with your name change, and we'll then create a shortlist of the ten best ones.

You can then vote for your favourite, which we'll announce on Thursday 31st October. The winner will receive a bundle of goodies from the MNHQ cupboard of treats.

*tat

UPDATE The poll is now live so cast your vote nowooooooo!

Hmm, Dangly I'm not sure you went high enough if it was still conscious minds you were consulting.

I'm edging back behind the curtain now so that I can watch you all and take notes. History might need an accurate account. I'll call it 'The Thighmaid's tale", "The book of Thigh", or "The Thighble".

"The Lore of Thigh"

Maybe not Circle, I must admit I couldn't concentrate properly with 'Four in a Bed' being on telly. I wanted to see what they had for breakfast in Blackpool!

I'll travel astrally to the outer reaches of the galaxy next time!

Circe are you saying you eschew the Super Thighway? You're too good for us?

She's one o' them lurkers Thigh I tried to dazzle her with my higher connections but no ...

I am a chronicler. As such I must be an independent observer like an anthropologist.

THE THIGHMAID'S TALE
Book one: The Lore of Thigh

I need more information.

Do the Thighs have physical bodies?

How many thighs are there? (N=?)
Does this number increase or decrease over time? (N=N-1 / N=N+1)
Does the Thighs' predeliction for cannibalism form a nutritional, religious or sexual function?
Are all marriages in the Thighway conducted with unconscious participants and what part does cannibalism form in the ceremony?
Is the claimed ability to commune with higher beings a load of bollocks?

Oh I see, well that's easy then, the answer to all of those questions is 'I don't know'

Carry on with the Chronicles, they'll be of value to future generations!

Don’t be alarmed Josepheen. Here, come and look at our puppies.

Circle I think you’ll find you’d be a participant observer. Come along.

THIGHS I don't even know where to find you all. So far all my information has been gathered from um ... leakage is the only way to describe it ... onto other threads.

Oh well, you must study harder.

Josepheen don't be afraid, we are just a group of kindly agony aunties here to solve all of your problems!

Come a little closer, let us look at you ...

Josepheen you can change your name at will but you'll receive better service from us if you do donate an organ to the bucket on arrival!

JOSEPHEEN!!!! NOOO!!! I've heard they only keep those puppies for Sunday Brunch.

THIGHS I dipped in and out of the original advice threads but have no idea what form this has morphed into nowadays.

It feels a bit like venturing down the sewers to find the house pet that was flushed several years ago. I don't think I can face pushing my way past the fatbergs to find you all.

Pass me the felt tip DT, I’ll mark the incision points.

Now, now Circle we are always kind to animals, we have 'pet's corner' sometimes when we are in the mood and we're planning a goat but don't mention the frog (that was an accident!).

Jo any organs will be found to be an acceptable donation, every little helps.

Don't be silly Circle adventure is exciting!

I have sent you both the Batsignal.

HURRY UP IT'S NEARLY STRICTLY!!

Oh look DT, CircleofWillis is actually CircleofWillies! Bring the instrument, we can replenish the bucket!

We have a scientist who will answer your questions in the form of an equation. Then you will understand the true calling.

What you talkin' 'bout Willis?

Oh Jo please relax, we have a serrated grapefruit spoon and some pritt stick. We're excellent at surgery.