Trigger warnings

[TheDisillusionedAnarchist]

I was wondering why there are trigger warnings on posts mentioning child deaths.

Are they there at the request of the OP? Or was there some kind of agreement among the bereaved parents of mumsnet that they wanted them? If so okay I guess I missed it.

I have to say if not I find it quite offensive. I find a lot of things 'triggering' on mumsnet not least threads about living babies but I don't get trigger warnings. I've seen them even when the thread title is quite clear. What are they for? Why are they there?

or indeed the title clarified.

sugar there's no need to apologise. And it's also worth noting that the threads are often reported by people who see the trigger warnings on behalf of others rather than having been triggered by it themselves iyswim.

That would be fine OneMagnum... I am honestly not planning on browsing the pregnancy topic to report threads on pregnancy or the sleep topic to report threads on 'my baby won't sleep'. Anymore than I imagine those triggered by child death browse the bereavement topic looking for threads to report.

However if a thread on AIBU or chat, has an unclear title and is about a triggering topic for me then I can report and a trigger warning can be added. Or alternatively I'm happy for it to be moved into a more appropriate topic if preferred.

I think many things end up in Chat because people want a quick response and with vague titles to encourage people to click. It's just the way Mumsnet works and, as far as I can tell, has done since 2004.

I think it will need more than one poster reporting it to have a trigger warning added.

I agree phequer but plenty of less common parenting topics are accepted here without trigger warnings and child death is pretty damn common.

1 in 4 parents experience pregnancy loss which may mean pregnancy threads are triggering for them and there are 3586 stillbirths a year. Add in losses in infancy, childhood and adulthood and a high percentage of parents will experience the death of one or more of their children.

I think thread titles used to be clearer actually and there were no such thing as trigger warnings unless added by the poster themselves, in which case fine. I remember _chat starting (was that in 2004?) and it was for mostly irrelevant topics. People used to post parenting topics in the correct section. Not use chat as a catch all and I don't remember the trend for unclear thread titles at that time either,

Of course this site has got much more heavily moderated over the years but if you're moderating you need clear non discriminatory policies.

While child death may be relatively common it is absolutely tragic. Domestic violence and rape are also common. It isn't the rarity or not of the topic of the post that means it needs a trigger warning-it's the potential for upset. I'm not sure infant feeding threads really have the same issue.

Sorry for your loss op.

but people ask for trigger warnings to be put on inoffensive posts about child death phequer

Really, you haven't seen the hundreds of 'I feel terrible about not breastfeeding I've failed my child' type threads. Infact perhaps all child related threads need a warning, I've seen a lot of threads where people with infertility find themselves triggered by children.

I have breast hypoplasia and was unable to fully breastmilk feed my daughter, her death was partially caused by a breastmilk preventable illness. Shouldn't I find happy breastfeeding threads or worse 'why doesn't everyone breastfeed' threads triggering? Fine if they're in the infant feeding topic but what if they're in AIBU or _chat

Even inoffensive things can be massively upsetting for some people. It's not that people find it offensive, it's that they find it upsetting. Sometimes things can be upsetting enough to cause panic attacks, or in my case seizures.

There's a difference.

Breastfeeding 'failure' is a known contributer to significant postnatal depression. Surely women who want should be able to avoid these threads especially if in inappropriate topics or unclearly titled (or both)

I've seen a lot of threads where people with infertility find themselves triggered by children.

I'm in that category but I wouldn't request a trigger warning for something that's really my issue. I find scan pictures on Facebook hard to look at but I wouldn't dream of asking for a trigger warning on a thread on here which had a scan picture. Almost everybody will find the death of a child very upsetting content while most people wouldn't mind seeing scan pictures.

Yes and I know at least three women for whom breastfeeding caused panic attacks and many who had PTSD following traumatic births who found happy birth stories or even worse bad birth stories triggered their PTSD. Why not trigger warning those threads.

Puuple Daisies and that is exactly my point. You don't have the right to avoid upsetting content! child death is terribly upsetting especially to people who live it. Trigger warnings just contribute to the idea that it needs to be avoided in polite society.

Sure it can trigger some people, particularly people who have had such a terrible experience themselves however so can many other topics. Either all need a trigger warning or none. Singling out child death (and some other topics) is not a reasonable approach.

Sorry X post there.

I have a "trigger", it's something I am phobic about and I find upsetting, horrible and terrifying. So I stay away from it. I can't always avoid it in RL, but I sure as hell keep off anything online. Occasionally something does come up on here, but that's my problem to deal with. I'm not asking for trigger warnings because it's not something that will trigger many people.

I think there's a difference in adding trigger warnings for common triggers such as child death, domestic violence and rape, and sticking them on anything that has even the smallest potential to upset anyone.

MilkTwoSugars - so why do people who are triggered by child death get special consideration here versus people triggered by say birth stories? Pregnancy, birth, babies are known triggers for a lot of people, why single out child death as 'especially triggering'

phequer- too right. I am not actually expecting trigger warnings on every post, not least because I think the over moderating of this site has got ridiculous in recent years but I am expecting no trigger warnings on child death threads unless requested by the OP or to be generous if they have an unclear title.

Nobody seems to have any arguments as to why child death is a special case.