"MI5 should recruit from Mumsnet..."

[KateMumsnet]

Hello all

There's a rather fabulous story in the news today, which suggests that the security services could benefit from MNers' skills. What do you think - time for us to make a [false beard] emoticon?

I'm up for it. I need a change of direction with my career. I have a good eye for details and my day job requires me to do home visits in all areas so I'd have a good cover story! I don't mind cutting corners in order to get the job done and when auntie flo arrives I have no objection to maiming or torturing people!

can you imagine a detention centre staffed only by pre-menstrual women?

How I'd like to see some of the ISIS people in a place like that.

To watch as though one is being watched; to observe with apparent lack of guile; to examine whilst making small talk; to engage naturally whilst being guarded: would doing that for a living be a challenge or an extension of what a cunning fox mother does everyday?

My CV is ready - I am waiting to be recruited - still job hunting.

i need that job
i'm bloody observant
minutiae is my middle name
Oh and I've had my kids - loads of the buggers
I'm sooo MI5...

I have reached the age when I appear to be invisable. I can go anywhere so long as it doesn't clash with Corrie! What's the money like? I could mug up on codes which I could send to other spy mumsnetters - dh dd ds op could all take on different meanings. I am applying today so watch for my coded messages in the near future as I am sure they will realise I am just what they want.

Having watched a few James Bond movies with the kids recently it doesn't surprise me that the security services don't get many female applicants. They need to sort out a few issues with sexual harassment among existing personnel first!

What we have learned from this discussion

• some MNetters fancy themselves as Ros Meyers
• some MNetters fancy themselves as Ruth
• some MNetters just fancy Lucas

99% of what we know about the security services is from watching Spooks.

Personally, I think it should be small girls from the age of four up. Nothing, but not the smallest nothing, gets past my DD.

spy is also one of the careers I have wanted

together with foreign office

quite like code breaking too

myaccount.nobleworkscards.com/mod_images/imageitem/5325-spy-drone-humor-mothers-day-paper-card-glenn-mccoy.jpg

I'm looking forward to the side benefits of being a spy.

I remember I also score really highly on House of the Dead, that's got to count for something...

I spy with my little eye...

Is Spooks wrong then?

I thought all spies looked like Matthew McFadyen and all databases were crackable and comprehensive ....

I can't begin to express my utter disappointment.

Littleham, 20 laptops of data equals one illegal fag behind the garage ....

Would I have to brush my hair?

M15 needs is spies who can't keep their big fat yappers shut ?

Lips are sealed.

Someone here's quoted in the Fail today (I found it on a train, ok!) might have been trying to spot secret messages concealed within.

Christ, I've been quoted on the DM online. I want to bleach my fingertips (the two I use for typing).

Which of you here could walk into a pub in a town you don't know, sit down near a stranger, and within half an hour have winkled out their personal details and passport number out of them?

M15 needs is spies who can't keep their big fat yappers shut ?

MI5 needs MNetters. Disinformation is key. Secrets are not the problem.

I checked the DM.
Guess who doesn't actually watch Spooks?

Hermione Norris plays a former MI6 officer - called Ros Myers - who joins an MI5 counter-terrorism division in the TV show Spooks
while true, it doesn't match the figure it was supposed to be the legend for.

Clearly don't recruit agents from the DM

I think all women, and especially all blonde women, must look the same to their editors.