Do you think it's time to start a sexuality shaming topic?

[HotSauceCommittee]

For all those who want us to shut up and not to help and laugh with others about sex?

Maybe we could keep the censorious ness and the comments of "what is wrong with people?"

"This is pathetic"

"Why do you need/want to talk about this?"

I've seen no "twats", either metaphorical, or literal, on the sex threads, just coherent, strong argument in favour of discussion and some great humour at times.

I notice that the anti-sex brigade didn't answer some of the rebuttals and counter questions to their protests on the sex threads. Perhaps they'd care to elaborate on a special "Sexuality shaming" thread? Then they can get together some really good insults going and hopefully make the "sex positive" posters among us shut up and creep back into the woodwork.

Has it got legs, do you think?

"You can be a lover of sex but not feel the need to tell the whole world all the graphic details."

Indeed, Usual, but not if you are the op of this thread it seems.

Just for once I would like to be able to discuss what is a large part of my life without being accused of making it up to amuse men. Or only enjoying it because men have told me to. Or only doing it to impress men. Or being forced to do it by abusive men. Or only thinking it is ok because of porn made for men.

Why can't women enjoy sex? Why can't we talk about it?

The sex shaming on here seriously upsets me quite often. Society is shitty enough to women who enjoy sex. Even more if we happen to enjoy something out if the ordinary.

I've given up asking for advice on here about anything vaguely related to sex, mentioning funny non sex stories that happened to occur in venues or at events related to sex, or even 'admitting' liking some really relatively mainstream practices.

I keep finding myself joining in on these threads, though, when I see women being attacked for enjoying sex that doesn't happen to fit into the narrow boxes that the posters deem ok. This is not in any way acceptable in society as a whole and is especially disgraceful on a women focused site like this.

They always accuse those of us who are happy to talk about it of somehow forcing it on them and ridiculing them for not doing it.

There is PLENTY I don't do, I still think people can discuss it without it being an attack on me.

Sigh.

Not sure why you need to talk about it.

Am I being thick?

If you have an issue then fine. But otherwise just why?

Sex is private.

No idea what's gone on.. but re a sex board.. they are handy and yes you do get the initial influx of pain in the arse novelty threads but in general they die down and they get sorted out just like any other board. Been there, done that.

However, this place just wouldn't do well with one imo.. that penis beaker thread broke mumsnet, it just would be a serious pain to deal with at the back end... unless you have it as a private need permission to enter place which wouldn't work with the way things are with name changes and other stuff on here.

It's a shame but this place is just too big and noisy for a sex board.

I don't expect many to agree with me though

To some it is. To others it is a subject which they have no issue speaking openly about. Especially on an anonymous forum.

I have no issue with it, if people wish to have a thread where they discuss funny stories and what not then so be it. If I want to I will join in if not I will hide it.

I don't want to be perceived as uptight or a prude just because I don't want to share on the internet.

I would say you were just private Sparkling. The same way as I would say those who like to share are just open.

Its horses for courses.

Yes, I suppose so but I think there's 'open' and there's 'TMI open' though.

For you there is a boundary for others there isn't.

My friend is an over sharer more so after a few wines. She is comfortable with it and has no problem with giving us all the sordid details. It is her choice to share the same way as it's my choice to listen.

I see MN as no different. If there is the word sex in the title or you read the OP and it is not your cup of tea then don't read it. Don't bother commenting on it just hide it and let those who wish to share carry on doing so.

I don't see the need for TAAT or arguments. If HQ want to have a dedicated topic then so be it but if not people just need to dismiss the threads they don't like and move on. There is no law that states you must read every thread and comment on it.

I like boundaries, me. I don't have any oversharing friends in RL. I like it that way, and certainly do not want to hear what any of them get up to in bed ta very much.

The thread that was closed (not 'fart porn' FFS but embarrassing sex stories) was bloody hilarious and posters were not giving a blow by blow account of their sex life - on the contrary most posts were about poo, Pumping and periods. So posters can be forgiven for not realising it was a troll OP.

There seems to be a few MNers who are anti-sex and take it upon themselves to open sex threads with a view to shoot down any woman who dares to say she enjoys anything beyond missionary with the lights off and label them 'pathetic' for having a giggle about the subject.

When did sex become bad? Did I miss a meeting or something? It is private but so are a lot of things discussed on MN and I think injecting a little humour into the subject of sex is fine.

Similarly sex is not a sordid act which must be kept hush hush with those who share being seen to be embarrassing themselves. It's a wonderful experience and if competent adults are happy to discuss it on an anonymous Internet forum then leave them be. Yes there will be pervs a looking for wank fodder but they are just heavy breathers on the other side of a computer who can do no physical damage to people involved and I think if you are aware of that and believe it's worth it to discuss sex anyway then who do others think they are to label people 'twats'.

To me it smacks of troll when women purposefully post on a thread calling other women pathetic, childless, perverts etc because they discuss something different to them. You're just legitimate trolls thats all.

And in response to "why discuss it at all" - because we want to. It's only sex FFS.

But maryz is right though.. it's perfectly fine to play along with a sex thread and share all you like but the fact remains that people can get carried away sharing their private sex lives while some unknowns are wanking themselves off or unknowingly end up plastered all over the internet. Some of them are blatant.. some of them try and come in through the back door on an established thread from a few years ago and it's especially cringeworthy when there's no delete or edit button if you change your mind what you've put out there.

I think that sometimes people need saving from themselves IMO and there is not one of us who hasn't been taken in by bullshit at one time or another I don't think. If you want to share to all then crack on but some are a bit green behind the ears sometimes I think.

Rule of thumb I believe is that if somebody posts urging caution then it's good to heed it.. take a pause and ask yourself if you really want to share what you're about to in a very public place.

I feel like a mother hen now so i'm buggering off.. have fun

I'm kind of in the middle. I don't mind a funny sex story amongst friends but I can happily live without the mime/sound effects and detailed descriptions

So, people who don't like to tell the internet all the details of their sex lives are anti sex? Or Lights off vanilla types?

People who talk about sex all the time bore the shit out of me tbh.

On here and in RL.

Or the mental images.

gamer

I see what you are saying but at the end of the day the majority of Mnetters are over the age of 18 and therefore responsible for their own actions. We cannot take in upon ourselves to tell them what they can and cannot write about. It is a very patronising view to have.

You can report any thread/post that you like and it is then up to MNHQ to make a decision on it.

And what the fuck is all this 'sex shaming' bollocks that's being spouted.

New buzz word is it?

There are loads of very explicit threads on MN.

There was criticism on this specific thread - now known to be trolling.

Perhaps the problem is with trolls, and with unfunny threads aping those of a couple of days earlier?

It does have an affect on the sort of pervs posters that are attracted to the site.

But maybe some posters are happy about that.

Chippy, the deleted thread really wasn't about embarrassing sex stories.

It was a creepy wanky perv asking for farting stories.
It didn't pretend to be anything else.

Anyone who didn't see that is either frighteningly naive or lying.