to be ridiculously excited to have just booked tickets for a swinging club for NYE party?

[goodcompany2]

First time without kids on NYE in 7 years and excited!!!

Christ, there are some judgmental prudes on here! Why are people so repelled by others' sexuality?!

Sounds fun op. Hope you have a great night!

Quorn I completely agree. I think it's sleazy, cheap and wouldn't want to know people who do that as an idea of fun. bUT it's ops life so she should spend it doing what she wants.

Much healthier and happier to my mind if both parties are honest, open and sexually satisfied, whatever their mores

But surely not as 'healthy and happy' as both parties being honest, open and sexually satisfied with each other?

And I have to say never before have I been accused of being a judgemental prude just because I'm not into swinging . Only on Mumsnet...

Certainly beats my plans for NYE - which are sleeping as i'll have a newborn by then.

So many judgey pants on here,it was quite obvious what the OP was talking about from the thread title so why click it,other than to get yourself offended?

OP,hope you and your other half have a great time! For a more enlightened conversation might be worth heading over to the sex topic.

Urgh.

Well you are clearly looking forward to it, thanks for sharing. Enjoy.

Quornmakesmefart I agree it does sound incompatible with a happy, healthy, respectful relationship on the surface. The reality is that it only works if both people are happy and secure in the relationship and within themselves. Communication between them must be excellent and each of them be able to say No witter about any potential worries without fear of pressure etc.

LagunaBubbles Our sex life is not in trouble to be fixed by this. If (and we have had a few minor niggles) we had problems/issues we would not swing until they were resolved. It's an extra zing to an already great sex life which is why it's a very occasional thing and no disappointment if we don't indulge in it.

Hope that helps a bit

Are there condoms everywhere at these parties and do people use them for oral sex as well. I would be concerned about people who might have cold sores or warts or something. How do you ensure everyone is disease free?

one of the most important things we can give our children is a good example of how a happy, healthy relationship should be. To me that means their mum & dad loving and respecting each other above all others - not going to swingers parties.

You don't know that the OP and her partner don't have a happy and healthy relationship - or that they don't love and respect one another above all others. Surely their every day behaviour will demonstrate that more than their sex lives - I know my children are taught about respect and kindness and patience by watching my OH and I interact and communicate - not by having any knowledge of our sex life!!

goodcompany2 What if you are paired with someone that is not your type?

Quorn, you are being deeply judgmental and prudish. If anything, the OP's NYE suggests a stronger than average relationship with a greater degree of trust and openness.

There seems to be an element of smugness to your judgy-pants posts that helps you convince yourself that your relationship is not only perfect, but also how all relationships 'should' be. That's both ignorant and arrogant.

If you think your views and experiences are typical, you'd probably be truly horrified by what most people get up to behind closed doors in towns adn villages up and down the country!

Personally couldn't think of anything worse - I imagin these clubs to be full of middle-aged unattractive people. but even if they weren't I'd still rather be at home watching Jools Holland.

Christ, there are some judgmental prudes on here! Why are people so repelled by others' sexuality?!

Not being jugemental, personally, it's just that the word 'swinging' always conjurs up such a grim picture. Mostly this one.

Mrs I'm not offended - I actually find the subject quite interesting, mainly because it is the other end of the scale of anything I can ever see myself wanting to do. I would be fascinated to actually hear why people like to do it.

Deep down I can't help thinking that if people were truly in a happy relationship with somebody they love they wouldn't even consider it.

Not for us.

The OP wasn't asking for your approval - all she said was that she was 'excited' to be going.

I hope you have a really great time goodcompany !

I know a couple who are swingers

they are very happy and very very much in love and yes we all find it a bit difficult to understand but really its none of our business its a few hours of fun every month or so

and if we are truly honest most of us at some point even with when we are with someone we very much love wonder what sex is like with another person or we have a crush and fantasise about it there is nothing wrong with that

I would never ever believe a man who told me he never desired another woman or imagined having sex with them and I would never try to fool anyone into believing I felt that way

have fun

Whoknewitcouldbeso condoms are there but people use their own - you know the provenance. Oral with condom ?- purely up to the giver. The only rules are that you know what you are comfortable doing and respect other people's rules. No pressure.

MTWTFSS - politely decline. No reasons, no pressure, no rudeness. Also my BF would check I was ok with it before things even got that far. (as i would him to check he was ok too). No-one touches anyone (even in a flirty way) without checking it's ok. Much safer than the local nightclub in my town where I've been grabbed, mauled and letched at by disrespectful louts.

I say each to their own.

Honestly, I couldn't be arsed. I am not opposed to open relationships. Two good friends of mine are very happy with their open relationships.

But I just couldn't be arsed. I can't even be arsed going out on New Years at all.

I did find it funny that the OP felt the need to point out it was a child free event though.

If it's any consolation to all those picturing pampas grass and pot-bellied, ederly lotharios; most of my local clubs/parties now vet applicants' photos before allowing you to join and attend, thereby guaranteeing the presence of no Stringfellow-types. Average-to-beautiful people only(!)

Eww, it makes me think of doggies all standing round waiting until it's their turn to 'have a go'