Have we got a starting Secondary School Support thread?

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

I’ve just just asked DD what the sandwich box and bottle are for in the fridge. It turns out she’s made her first packed lunch ready for school. She doesn’t start till next Tuesday

"Aornis So sorry to hear about meeting and them mentioning special school. That's my fear too as the education in them is dire."

Sorry to dip in and out, but was that a comment about Special Schools in your area, Pandas, or your feeling about Social Schools in general? My DD1 attends Special School and I found it quite upsetting to see the education provided by Special Schools referred to as 'dire'.

I can understand that there is a huge difference in need between intellectually extremely able children with emotional challenges, who are unable to access the curriculum because of their emotional and social needs, and children with both intellectual and social and emotional needs. I know that their needs are different. But special schools do a wonderful job of individualising the curriculum to allow children to grow and develop.

DD1 was predicted to be able to read a few words on a shopping list by the time she was an adult. She's far exceeded that. She's improving in maths all the time. She is way behind, but improving.

I didn't think state special schools in general catered for bright kids but if someone knows one that does would happily send DS there. I went round one and asked about the education and they said they don't really bother with educating them, its more about managing behaviour. The percentage of pupils reaching the expected standard in that school in reading, writing and maths is 0%. GCSE is a similar picture. It was similar in all the special schools I researched. If there was a special school where DS would have a chance of getting good GCSEs - by which I mean As or Bs across the board in 9 or 10 subjects I would go for it but there's nothing even vaguely close. I've heard quite a few people say similar so I don't think its particularly local and many end up home educating. The facilities were good pool etc and obviously there's a much lower staff ratio. I haven't looked in this area but I've heard so many people say this that I wouldn't be optimistic. It's obviously worth looking locally.

Okay, I see where you are coming from. That's sad, and the special school you spoke to was seriously adrift from where it should be in its goals.

Most state Special Schools will have a core targeted intake, and for most state Special Schools, learning disability will be amongst their stated requirement for acceptance.

I don't think it's fair to say they don't bother with teaching. DD1 was an old NC level 1a in maths when she started at her secondary school and she's now pushing level 3. When she started there she had written a grand total of 4 sentences in one day. Now she is expected to write in paragraphs. It's progress by capability.

I think there are a few private SEN schools for bright kids, and parents tend to go to tribunal and get them places there. It shouldn't be necessary, but it's what happens.

Interhigh is also becoming popular as an alternative for kids who can't cope with MS but are bright. But I'm waffling now!

They seem to be withdrawing adjustments that they put in (after I made a fuss) at the beginning of term! They see flashes of who she can be and if they handle her right they could see more.
I have had a chat with a friend whose dd with ASD went there. I'm going to be a very stroppy mare come Monday. DH is going to email the head and we will be far less nice than we have been.

That's so short-sighted of them! Have they said why? DD2 has been like a different child since Monday, just because she's started going to the SEN block at lunch time and seeing the school dog.

Yes I've heard of parents going to tribunal for the private ones though think they have to pay something like £10k in fees to go to tribunal. Could be wrong - obviously if you win I would be happy to pay that but if you lose that must be awful.

Also a friend said they knew a child like mine who they had to send to a private ASD school and they said it was residential - I couldn't bear him to be away from us. My friend say her friend was happy to have the break but DS is such a sweetheart at home and loves being home. Glad your DD is making good progress there. I wish they would do special schools for the bright Aspergers maybe doing less subjects - like a focus on maths, science, economics - because that would be ideal for him, I hate watching him struggle in mainstream. He needs the higher staff ratio but almost needs higher than mainstream can take him to in the subjects he loves and he can't stand things like art or drama and I think just finds too many subjects. My Mum used to teach children who didn't go to school and she said its really hard to teach beyond a certain level as it gets specialised and it was going beyond her knowledge but before that the kids benefitted from 1-2-1.

I found complaining to anyone and everyone was the way to go Aornis. Very frustrating and time consuming but it worked at least as a short term fix.

We've had 3 days of 1-2-1 available and they are offering next week for him to have 1-2-1 when he wants it - I just have to get him to tell us when. He got through 4 out of 5 lessons today by himself and 1 with 1-2-1. He also gets let off homework and help with losing things. There is quite a lot they can do but I had the we can't do anything at first. I can beleive there isn't much money but to say there's nothing is simply untrue. I think it helps if you can offer a solution. I do firm but polite e-mails. It does feel a bit like a war but then you get people on your side and you start feeling you might have a chance of winning. I have had hundreds of e-mails and loads of phone calls though, its non stop.

Can he access Khan Academy, etc., or does he need face to face teaching?

Thanks for the mention of Interhigh Lougle I didn't know about online schools. That could work, atm I want to do everything to try and make it work at his current one but the Head did say he's borderline on what they can cope with so am trying to get plan Bs and plan Cs. A lot of parents have recommended another school in the area so I have my plan B but home ed / internet ed would be my other plan if both fail. DS would love a school dog.

If the adjustments before where helping I'ld ask for them to be put back in place Aornis It seems far too early for them to be thinking of giving up on a year 7, even DD who has no special needs struggled. There's so much change all at once. I asked for them to reduce things back so no homework punishments, he got help with finding things, he can now go to lessons he can cope with and miss lessons he can't by being in support room. Made a huge difference in just 3 days. How long it will last can't say but worth a try. Good Luck!

Lougle Interhigh is something I've considered, yes.
By trying to make her do the subjects that upset her she's getting too upset to do them and also the following lesson that she would go to happily and then telling me that she can't miss lessons. And because the Inclusion staff keep upsetting her she's now avoiding the unit because that's where they are.

Penguins I don't think I could send dd off to board either. She'd be fine at your dream school for your ds too. :)

I got him Mathletics online but he does need someone to nag him to do it and someone to review answers / adjust the level. I just stopped working a few days ago so at the moment its fine for me to work through things with him plus its interesting to see what issues are. Too easy work he was giving the wrong answer deliberately. Quite frustrating as suspect he's been doing this at school too though have warned them. He was also giving 10 minute talks on the harder questions on all his knowledge of the subject. So had to tell him just to answer the question with what you think they want. He's so like my brother.

miss lessons he can't by being in support room that's exactly what she needs and we had that for 2 out of 3 which they're cutting to 1 but she doesn't know that yet. If making her do 1 is causing such upset, increasing it to 2 will double it.

Aornis DS also seems to be struggling with the number of subjects but school have said for next week he can choose what lessons. Sounds like your DD needs to go back to that - I don't mind too much as long as he's doing the core ones like Maths, English and Science. He would be much better at a school with less subjects in more depth. Mine had a relationship breakdown like yours but got back when they changed the system so it is retrievable but sooner they act the better. Only issue is I don't know what will happen when it goes to full timetable but guess that's what the EHCP is for.

Definitely would say no to going down to 1, might even need to go up to 3.

Sorry the school are being difficult Aornis. It's so frustrating to remove support just when it's starting to work. I hope you're able to get them to agree to reinstate it whilst you wrangle with the LA over the EHC needs assessment.

SEN provision varies so much school to school. DS2's school is great at supporting DC who need additional help in academics, but DS1 would have lasted less than a week had he gone there. Even with an EHCP, it just isn't set up for a child like him. The only thing DS1 doesn't like about his school (apart from it being a school(!)) is the journey. He does about 50% in the mainstream atm. The 50% in the ASD base isn't all formal subjects, it's also social skills and homework timetabled in. When it comes to GCSE time, he'll be dropping a subject or 2 to do a life skills course instead. No formal qualification but they get taught how to use public transport, making food, ordering food out etc. He will loathe it!

Ds1’s school doesn’t have an autism base as such but has been brilliant. They gave him 1:1 for all subjects but he’s coping amazingly well with the creative subjects I thought he’d hate (art, drama etc) and he’s asked for the 1:1 to be removed so we’ve agreed to that.
He needs the extra support for all the traditional subjects though, but he is resistant. Trying to convince him it’s for his own good is an ongoing conversation.

My DS always argues he doesn't need 1-2-1 but then was going into lessons standing in the corner all lesson with hands over his ears. I think he doesn't like appearing different by having a TA but then his behaviour makes it obvious too. I have to not call it a TA just the option to choose where you do your work and that's OK. Still have to get him to give me his timetable for next week. It's a bit random which lessons he's agreeing to though - suspect its going on how strict teacher is rather than the subject as he agreed to 2 hours of English today and rejected D&T.

See even this tiny bit of the thread shows how different dc with ASD are. Dd is academic but utterly paralysed with anxiety , phobias and SPD and possible dyspraxia. She'd do maths and art all day long. Won't speak to anyone though.

Absolutely Aornis - DS hates the SN area but other kids love it.

for DS1, Yr7 was really about undoing the damage of primary school (ASD teacher's comments). Being in the base was intense, he struggled with the noise, struggled with some of the pupils. At Christmas it got very noisy and he apparently surveyed the room and declared, with great disdain "I am so disappointed with my generation!" then walked off shaking his head. But now at break times etc he's the first to be cracking jokes and chatting.

He got 99 in maths SATs as he hated it at primary, but is now in mainstream for it and doing really well. Conversely he did well on the English SATs but is still in the base for that, as he can have real issues with producing work. The end of year assessment was on Anne Frank which was a disaster for him. The short stories he produces are amazing. Usually quite dark though!

Frayed dd had a fabulous teacher in Yr 6. She really got her and genuinely seemed to enjoy trying to look at the world through dd's eyes. I feel like this has undone all her work :(

Just wanted to express support for DC on the spectrum struggling. Heartbreaking to see it unfold in slow motion.

My elder DS survived MS quite well, probably due to full time 1:1. It is not just academic support, but also emotional if the TA is the right personality; it also provides some company when they didn't find a sympathetic peer. It avoided the meltdown.

Penguin, Aornis, have you asked for buddies and mentors? Did you ask for other children with ASD who are coping well to share their experience? Maybe an elder child with EHCP and 1:1 TA could talk how it works for her better than no TA ...

Mine struggles with producing English work too - he got 118 spag and 108 reading but we were very lucky reading was on pandas. Though I am really not sure what his ability level is as he told me he deliberately answers reading questions wrong. He was doing that on maths with me when it was too easy. Bangs head

Thanks Cakes I don't think he has a buddy. I am not sure how many ASD kids they have, DS said its just him and school told me they had an ASD child in the past. Surely got to be more than one though. He is having a lot of time with Head of House who is quite senior and they are bit like a mentor and that's helping. DD said lots of other kids are spreading rumours about DS saying he was chewing gum and suicidal, both rubbish, DS doesn't seem that bothered just said they should make better rumours. If there was an ASD child he could be paired with that would help as he says he's the only one. A good TA makes a big difference, DSs one at primary was a bit scary, but teachers were lovely and was still an extra pair of hands.