Sixth-form girl living alone

[BoboChic]

Do you think that a private mixed sixth form should admit a new pupil who will be living alone in a small rented apartment during the week, returning home to her parents at the weekend?

it's quite legitimate for parents to ask probing questions about the underperformance of a single cohort at A-level, more particularly when that cohort did very well at GCSE.

Agreed. Not legitimate to blame someone else for their kids' behaviour though. At the end of the day these were teenagers who happily participated in whatever they did. They are the ones responsible.

It's not really the problem in the OP. You refer to something that has already happened and ended badly. So clearly it was not a good set up in that instance.

But it's all in the past, so there is nothing to do about it now. Why are you asking us the question?

And when did the parents realise? That this girl, was so effective????? That she mucked up the grades of everyone else in the year? All 30 of them? Got a B instead of an A.
Because of her.

They realised this? When? Pre mocks? Post mocks?

So these parents left their unsupervised teenage kids to go to parties, rent out a sex flat and ultimately underperform at A level, and now they are seeking a scapegoat. What a surprise.

There hasn't been any suggestion that the girl is in any way responsible - my friend was super clear about this and none of the parents think she is.

aginghippy - because it's a situation that might have been avoided had school management been more prescient. Indeed, posters further up the thread gave RL examples of well-known schools whose management is more prescient on such matters.

They did? Pp gave examples? Of what the school should have done? Really? Missed that. Remind me please?

What exactly should the school have done?

Because what you think they should have done - i.e. Tell all the parents of all the other kids this girl was living on her own - would never happen as it would be a breach of a whole report's worth of laws and rights.

The parents are trying to scapegoat the school. The failing is their own.

I did this coz my parents were dead. Sorry about that!

Hate to say it, but if a whole cohort or sixth form get below expected results chances are the teaching isn't up to scratch. Maybe the parents would be better off looking at who was teaching the class rather than scapegoating some poor girl- I have DC in private school and I know that even private schools have some teachers who aren't all that good.

Sixth formers party all the time - but that doesn't usually stop most of them getting their grades

1. Teacher tells 13 year old really not a good idea to notify your party to the world via snapchat/FB etc. Child goes ahead and does it anyway. PARTY HOUSE. Parents down the pub because their daughter tells them "it's so embarrassing to have you around, no one's parents stay at home" yada yada. It goes nuts.

2. School tells 16 year old girl as discussed with your parents, it's unusual for someone of your age to stay alone mid week but we've agreed to this due to x,y and z circumstances. It's best that you keep quiet to protect yourself from unwanted guests. 16 yr old goes and blabs to world PARTY HOUSE.

Simplified I know, but where is the responsibility here? I know *bobo will call 2) disimulating; but it could actually be safe-guarding, for a child that is actually legally able to live alone.

But the issue seems to be, that because it was a private school, they should have told the girl and her parents to back off, their offer of education is not for the likes of them.

We have no facts. No idea what level of engagement the school has had. Other than to tell people not to spread the fact that this girls lives alone. Make of that, what you will.

Nope, parents of the girl, nor the other cherubs willing to crash pad every night, not their parents are responsible. And the 16 year old is pretty blameless too.

Just the school's fault then.

Ah....it's all the fault of the school for allowing in riff raff.

Got it now....

Sadly private schools are full of kids with more money than sense....who are just like their parents.

It's why you have to be on top of what your children are doing and where they are spending their time. At 16 I would expect most parents to know what their teenager is up to. I know that teenagers can be secretive but quite honestly if they make mistakes as they have done here (it seems) then they need to accept the consequences of those mistakes...it's all part and parcel of growing up.

You cannot hold the school responsible under the indignant and self righteous "well fancy letting in a girl who had see circumstances".

The parents were trying to buy results and frankly without the aid of a crystal ball I cannot see how the school could have predicted what followed.

Personally if I were a teacher I would be very concerned about the welfare of a 16 yr old living alone.

FrancisCrawford - no, the girl did not do better than her peers. The whole year group went to university. Just not quite as good, for some of them, as expected because of missed A-Level grades.

The only thing I can see that she school has done wrong is seemingly not kept the parent informed when their children didn't seem to be handing in work up to the standard they would expect.

I don't think it is a bad thing to suggest to the girl that she doesn't make her living arrangements known among the students as telling them would make her vulnerable in itself.

But then I don't come from a well-to-do place and I would expect my 16/17 year old child to be with other teens in a whole range of situations, some care leavers, some carers for their own parents, some living with extended family, some left alone for extended time - I'd never start from the presumption that a child lived a lovely cosy life with their parents.

Oh didn't they manage RG then?! Because they partied. Which this girl forced them to do. And their parents never noticed they weren't at home each weekend. And the school never noticed their work and their mocks were below par. And never told the parents their kids work wasn't up to scratch.

Oh if only the school had emailed the parents and told them this, state school girl was living on her own. All would have been fine! Apart from the girl who'd have been vulnerable to all sorts given that the school thought the type of university their pupils attended was more important than a mere data protection act and safeguarding a vulnerable teen.

Damn the school!

If the girl was going home to her parents at the weekends, how was she responsible for the rest of the cohort crashing her empty flat?

All this partying and orgies going on in a small rented apartment every weekend and the neighbours never complained?

Yes!

I lived on my own during 6th form and saw my parents once every 3 weeks. It was fine, I spoke to them every day and school were very supportive - I had teachers who I knew I could go to if I had a problem.

I don't know where the weekend idea cropped up. As far as I understand and have stated the issues were during the week.