150k EDUCATION DD WANTS TO DO HAIR AND BEAUTY BTEC AT FE COLLEGE

[helenjackson2]

HI I AM NEW TO THIS FOURUM.DD CURRENTLY AT TOP GIRLS BOARDING SCHOOL SOUTH EAST.10GCSE GRADE A A* EXPECTED OXBRIDGE POTENTIAL.WANTS TO DO BTEC IN HAIR AND BEAUTY AT LOCAL FE COLLEGE WHAT CAN I DO TO STOP HER STUPID AND IDIOTIC IDEA.HELP

Let her try it without judging her. Either it will be right for her or she will quickly realise it's not and you can then support her either way.

Do you have any friends/acquaintances that could talk to her about their careers and give her some inspiration?

What's wrong with her doing something she is interested in, and might be happy doing it?

Let her get on with it. She clearly has no interest whatsoever in academia, and just because you've paid the price of a house for her education does not mean she likes it. Paying for her schooling was a choice you made, with no input from her, when she was little. Now it's her turn to choose.

Perhaps you could ask her what she wants to do in life, and then respect her choices? Presumably you paid out for her schooling so that she would have choices in life, not so that she'd follow your path in life?

If you're really convinced her choice is a bad one, then you need to explain why that is to her - eg average salary, promotion prospects, etc. But horrified "we didn't pay for your education so that you can do what you want" isn' a very good argument.

Why is it stupid and idiotic?

What is stupid and idiotic is forcing someone into a career path that they have absolutely no intrest in whatsoever. She is obviously intelligent, but that doesn't mean she shouldn't become a hairdresser. She might be excellent at it, she might hate it, but it is your job as a parent to support her not to dictate to her.

Try to get her to stay for a levels and then she can still go to do hair and beauty but at least is 2 years older and maybe will have changed her mind.
And if not, well your job is done, you have given her all the tools to utilitse in any career and the rest is her choice really.

Also, it might be worth fully supporting this whim, and then fully supporting a hasty transfer back to sixth form when she realises exactly how low the btec beauty course is pitched.

Why are you shouting?

She's happy, what's the big deal? She has the opportunity to go to Oxbridge if she wants to but she doesn't. It doesn't mean she may not change her mind, at least she has the choice. When you pay for an expensive education it can be disappointing (I wouldn't be impressed if ds went to work in Tesco) but the best interest of your child should be more important then your ambition for them.

Did you send this as a telegram OP?

Do you actually believe that hair and/or beauty is only for thick people? If so, you are very wrong.

There is a huge amount of theory behind both subjects (and they are separate subjects btw) and both careers have lots of diverse opportunities. For an intelligent girl either hairdressing or beauty therapy offers the chance of self-employment, cruise ship work or session work as well as the chance to work in an industry with one of the highest rates of job satisfaction around.

Don't be so judgemental.

break her legs

Compromise: if she does A-levels first and gets reasonable grades then you'll support her in her hair/beauty training. Not all sixteen year olds know what they want to do, and if she changes her mind then the A-levels will have left her options more open.

Sorry, not helpful. Tbh, do you stand much chance of changing her mind? Would it be better to support her in this and then gently steer her towards management courses afterwards? That way she could be involved in an industry she's interested in at a level you had envisaged. Alternatively, suggest she do a business course / a-levels at college and take part time beauty courses (my local college does one day courses in nail art, waxing etc; yours might be the same) with a view to setting up her own business after uni?

STOP SHOUTING

What would you prefer she did - something that would make her unhappy? You chose to spend that sum of money on her education, but no form of education provides a guarantee. All you can do is point out the other options that are open to her with her qualifications and suggest that she might want to look into them. She may very well end up earning very good money as the owner of a salon or salons, employing several people.

I'm never sure why people think the amount paid for an education should affect their career choices.

Some dc do brilliantly well at GCSE but don't enjoy academic study and choose other pathways and other teenagers like to wind their parents up so choose whatever might annoy them most (the latter often don't follow through with their plans, especially if their parents don't rise to the bait).

All you can do is make sure she's as well informed as possible (in a non judgemental way) about her options. If she changes her mind last minute she can apply late to sixth forms, or even start a year later.

Presumably you like to judge people...i presume you didn't have a 150k education judging by your grammatical errors and spelling mistakes.

Op you sound snobby and overbearing. Can't get over how nice people are being to you.

It could be the first steps in a very successful and enjoyable career in a highly creative business.

At the very least she will always be able to earn her own knicker money - unlike me, who got a 'proper' degree and a 'proper' career for a 'proper' company and now find myself pretty much unemployable.

Hair and beauty? Quelle horreur
Why don't you persuade her to do journalism instead. Like her mother.

GO AND GET A MOHAWK THAT SHOULD PUT HER OFF

Sounds like a good old fashioned bit of rebellion.

Why not compromise and say that if she does her A-Levels and then still wants to do hair and beauty you'll support her, but it will give her more choice if she keeps her options open.

If that fails, tell her you'll cut her off.

I wouldn't be happy about this either. Spending a fortune on children's education comes with no guarantees.