Downsizing to educate privately - any pearls?

[Tiredbutstanding]

Here's my (sorry, long) dilemma- do I sell up to go private for secondary or not?

We have attended our school for 3 years. Eldest DD is Y4, and there is STILL no weekly or bi-weekly academic homework and definitely NO maths written sheets. We get 30 mins every 2-3 weeks - mostly to look something up on the internet, and write a few paragraphs. Our 'homework' for this TWO WEEK PERIOD is to cut out a hut from a pattern, and stick some foliage on it for a class project. I kid you not.

My DD has needed extra maths this year as she has gaps in yr 2 and 3 maths which were not spotted until year 4 (along with many other children). We now have a tutor to assist.

I have met with/written to, the head, governors etc, to ask for voluntary homework - to no avail. Subsequently ....as the school does not seem to respect homework, neither do my children!! So when it lands, it is a BATTLE to get them to do it. The first attempt is AWFUL and worries me incredibly that this is what they actually produce at school. Yet when 'encouraged' they do a really good job, and the work is of a high standard. (We do now of course do our own homework to make up the shortfall but as it is 'mum' making them do it, and not the school, it is perceived as less valid and even 'unfair/unnecessary').

Why I don't pull them out and go elsewhere?...because we had SUCH a horrendous time when we moved 3 years ago. Also, to be fair to the Head, the year 6 results for the school are good and he says to 'have faith'. It is true that their maths results were 100% Level 4 maths, and about 50% Level 5. So a small miracle may happen - hence we'll stay at this school and do our best for them via home learning.

But for secondary - should we sell the house, and downsize to go private (to a non selective private school). I fear that this LACK of self discipline (that the school is, if not engendering, at least not preventing) is potentially going to fail both DD's at secondary- just when you need to be well motivated to flourish amongst 30 per class, and 8 classes of 30 per year.....

Should say here that if we go private the current lifestyle will have to go too (like many parents). (I went private as my parents knew I was a lazy monkey and I can see the same in my kids!! However it forced me to work hard and later gain a good career......and I've been eternally grateful for this.

Any pearls for me?

I think that seeker is replying to Heswall who doesn't believe that arbitrary results are possible. I can't think that you have read all the thread,smallwhitecat!

Smallwhitecat- my comment was directed to Heswall. As I thought was completely obvious- what did you think I meant?

I am not going to cut and paste the particular remark Heswall made which prompted my comment. Have a look. Hand me down uniforms feature.

And please don't restrict yourself to polite remarks on my account!

I was obviously wrong with my Googling if it is the Wirral.

*you're

I don't like to restrict myself in any way small white cat sorry

" I don't really wish innocent DCs ill will, but I would love her DC to fail! (I'm obviously not a nice person).

exoticfruits you really should engage brain before you post next time!

I've seen some very low remarks on MN about children in my time (always odd for a parenting website I think. I guess many adults just hate children ho hum)...but that is probably the lowest.

I wondered about reporting it too, but then I htought, no. Let people see it.

Always interesting to see what's deleted and what isn't.

I'm sorry-I shouldn't have said it but I was riled at the time-mainly by the comment that the well to do used grammar schools because their DCs didn't need jobs and it gave them something to talk about at dinner, that you can write your name it gets you a place and someone can use divorced parents(4 yrs before) as an excuse for failing and get in on appeal when some DCs have far worse to contend with and it would never be mentioned.

There is obviously something very wrong with the system if you have a very poor area with people on less than minimum wage, no hope and DCs who can't do basic maths- and at the same time the very well off whose DCs can take up grammar school places because , to quote, 'they don't need exam results and qualifications' and in between people who can pay and be 100% confident that their DC will automatically get a grammar school place because the general standard is so poor they need to fill the places.

I don't like the grammar school system-but that it it at it's very worst-basically money buys you a place. That huge chasm between the 'haves' and the 'have nots' is what we need to get rid of in this country. The poor DC whose family have been unemployed for years, and have no aspirations might as well have 'failure' stamped on their forehead at birth-while others sit back and are 100% sure that their DCs will have success. Furthermore if that DC lived in Kent success wouldn't be guaranteed. The child doesn't choose the family or where they live and the whole education system stinks.

However-I am sorry- I didn't mean it-of course I don't hold it against DCs that they have parents who irritate me! I take it back-although it has been deleted for me.

Parents who want the best for their children irritate you ? Says all I need to know about you. I wish my post hadn't been deleted and I hope you saw it.

Good

No Heswell-smug ones.

I missed it Heswell-I have been out all day.

I am glad that mine was deleted, I apologise for saying it.

How is sending your child to grammar school because they don't need qualifications and to give you something to talk about at dinner parties 'wanting the best for your children'?