My experience is having a child in nursery, and then primary, with SEN children.
IMO high needs SEN children NEED better care in education for themselves and that of their teachers and school mates.
My child has been hit, had things thrown at them, pushed, hair pulled etc etc because of these SEN children, and now in primary 3 their education is suffering as the teacher spends most of her time focused on the SEN child's behaviour and/or fixing then situation.
Lots of the children will now not play or interact with the SEN child. It was different with the child in nursery as the children were younger, more prone to forget and had the ability more to walk away but that is not the case when you are in a smallish room most of the day. I feel really bad for the child who is obviously struggling and honestly being marked as "bad" but at the same time I understand the other children's hesitation to engage with him.
The teacher my child has is in her first year teaching and I feel is very ill equipped or experienced to deal with the situation. There is no support from what I see. The SEN child is just expected to be included in everything and, being honest, that's not always possible without help. For example at drop off time the children are all asked to line up etc and this boy can be seen running around, not understanding requests of bag on and line up. He can be on the other side of the playground, climbing/hiding/running etc, and the teacher is faced with leaving her pupils to go chase him almost daily which results in the class going in late and/or some pupils getting disengaged and misbehaving themselves.
Its not fair to anyone involved and as a parent it's very frustrating so I can only imagine how the teacher feels especially as she, I know, also has the other parents complaining about situation and how it's effecting their children.
I truely believe SEN children should be included as much as possible and I encourage my child to play/include/engage and help them at school as much as possible, but there is only so much you can do.
Sometimes the situation calls for additional help but in this day and age giving, or getting, that help seems to go against the "rights" of the child as its seen as not including them or making them different.
IMO not doing something is making them different and go without rights but I've never had a SEN child so I don't know how I'd feel if the situation was reversed...I could feel like my child needs the "norm" to be included but I'd like to think I'd be more concerned about getting them the support they need.
This teacher in the original thread is at breaking point and I fully understand why - her job is not to provide the level of care this child so needs especially on top of looking after her class, it's almost asking her to do two jobs that are impossible to do alongside each other.
I 100% agree that the education needs to change - there needs to be some sort of assessment (wrong term maybe) that determines if these child can cope with mainstream schooling.
All parties involved deserve better.