You'll have had yours tiers....

[WaxOnFeckOff]

Thread 946....

Dirty tier 4 bastard checking in and shaking leprosy bell

I was out in the park with my 3 year old after it stopped raining today and I swear I broke out in a cold sweat at one point thinking what if he does a poo and I need to change him in the freezing cold great outdoors due to nothing being open...

@titsbumfannythelot

And it's taking around a week to fill these threads, so time for 3 more Christmas type names.

Then we can count down to Easter, and then death

Don’t know whether to laugh or cry

So I have a question?

With Hogmanay and Ne'er day cancelled, what happens with First Footing?

Surely she's got to let people over the doorstep. They can go straight back out again

@Bytheloch 😂

I don't grudge NHS workers anything, but this just feels like virtue signalling, whatabout the bin men, police officers, supermarket workers etc who all worked through lockdown...surely an NHS consultant on 80k a year would rather someone on min wage got the £500 rather than them?

@Covidnomore

So I have a question?

With Hogmanay and Ne'er day cancelled, what happens with First Footing?

Surely she's got to let people over the doorstep. They can go straight back out again

Jason says

We’re asking people to not use their first foot this year. Instead, waggle your feet on a zoom call together as a family. But don’t have a drink, perhaps share a choc ice together over zoom at midnight? Don’t drink. We’re asking you not to even think of drink. But you can ask a pet to first foot for you, John Swinney will have further details on that next Tuesday or Thursday, maybe even Monday.

I hope this doesn't make ordinary people resent the nhs workers getting this, it might actually backfire a bit.....

Cripes just seen nic on her talk to the nation.

Was like something unreal. Was she cdgi upped like a Star Wars vision. Was very unnerving

It's total virtue signalling. We have friends in NHS who freely admit that they were bored shitless throughout lockdown as they weren't seeing patients and weren't redeployed. Similarly I have a relative who works in a care home - their Facebook page was an interesting mix of graciously accepting the keyworker claps and blatantly breaking the rules socialising...

I know some had a horrendous time. But many had no worse a time than numerous other occupations

Lol at the choc ice Jason

You are bonkers Jason

@Covidnomore

So I have a question?

With Hogmanay and Ne'er day cancelled, what happens with First Footing?

Surely she's got to let people over the doorstep. They can go straight back out again

Is coal not banned?

We don't get many visitors, I'm not entirely sure we've had our first foot of 2020.

Still, with the requirement for tall dark and handsome, at least that rules out Jason Leitch anyone in Holyrood rocking up to the house.

You have to antibac the cat before it can first foot you

Question for Jason Leitch:

I’m in tier 4. Should I quarantine the stockings, smoked salmon and muffins to ensure a Safe Start to the day? And is a glass of Sherry permitted?

first footing is giving me hokeykokey vibes, one foot in, one foot out .......

I have a black cat but it's not very tall.

And is a glass of Sherry permitted?

No, you can have a very small and weak Snowball or a weak shandy (a can of Shandy Bass maybe)

@StatisticallyChallenged

You have to antibac the cat before it can first foot you

And it must be your cat, cannot stress enough how much it can’t be your neighbour’s cat.

And it must be your cat, cannot stress enough how much it can’t be your neighbour’s cat.

What if it wears a mask and socially distances? I was thinking of tying coal to it's collar and charging my neighbours a fiver a time.

Englandshire are allowed Santa's grotto and carol singing

@WouldBeGood

Question for Jason Leitch:

I’m in tier 4. Should I quarantine the stockings, smoked salmon and muffins to ensure a Safe Start to the day? And is a glass of Sherry permitted?

I’d be asking very serious questions about where you bought those items. Ask yourself could you have had them thrown in to your garden, instead of shopping in a tier 4 supermarket. I can’t emphasise enough how much you shouldn’t be thinking about drink. Not even Bailey’s. If you have a friend- also in tier 4, suggesting you have a weak snowball, I’d be asking for clarity on where they purchased the advocaat from and in what year?

@WaxOnFeckOff

I have a black cat but it's not very tall.

I've got a black smoke maine coon, he's tall and handsome. Can't lend him to you filthy higher tiered folk though.

Nicola Sturgeon is scared of my cats

But 500 quid. What about people who have lost their jobs or worked in public facing jobs throught this time

It seems like only some people deserved this money and anyone else working through were not worthy

It’s a divising thing to do

I’d be asking for clarity on where they purchased the advocaat from and in what year?

Errmm it's one of those wee mini bottles and it dates back to when my DC were allowed that on Christmas Eve so they'd go the fuck to sleep...so maybe when they were about 11/12? 8 or 9 years ago.

Nicola Sturgeon is scared of my cats

Is she scared of all cats or just yours specifically?

Can’t we all just get 500 quid to spend on weak shandies or big first footing cats food or chocolate stash