ALL NEW Road to Recovery for the Recently Ditched No3

[startingovernow]

Dearly Be-Chucked, we are gathered here today because, for whatever reason, our man has dumped us!

Evening my fellow Dumplings,

Happy are you pulling the p*ss??

Is this aimed at me??

Oooo don't be angry it was just in jest

You can get your own back on Soundtrack night

Hi Tea,

Hope you're feeling a bit better now.

Hi Chairmum, hope your ds is over the worst of it, nothing worse you have my sympathies.

Hi Maybees, you're still in flying form I see.

Hi Mavis, glad to hear you're doing well & that you might join us for meet up. There's no easy answers with ds but I'm sure it'll get easier with time.

Hi Pink, good to hear from you again.

Hi Moviegirl, will have to try & locate your other thread to get up-date. Hope you're well.

Waves to all, I'm probably forgetting someone, hard to keep up.

Happy, actually I applaud you that was brilliantly witty, well done ! Gave me a great laugh.....

Thanks Pinksmarties. Just watched a chick flick. Hmmm probably not the best idea.

I don't feel depressed (yet). Just have a lot of thoughts going round in my head and sadness from the hurt.

2 of my brothers are on AD's. Even my hubby is on them. I think they're worth it if you need help.

Once my counseling starts I'll probably find it easier.

Got loads of lovely friends. Just sometimes need to vent. And yes I suspect I will have the last laugh but it will also be sad, as he will regret the choice he made and it will be too late by then. Our kids deserve a daddy who's there for them everyday. Not just when he feels like it. Coming from a family where my parents have been married over 40 years and still love each other, it's hard to imagine the fact that I won't have that. I always dreamed of getting married and having kids, as I've probably said before. It's all been stolen from me, all my dreams.

Enough of my whining. Off to bed. Find me another song Maybee, something to smile to when I wake I need a laugh x

Hi Tea, I don't think anyone really has the last laugh in a separation with dc's. I think all of us set out with the dream of happy ever after & I think we'd all have preferred a chance to raise our dc's in a family unit. However life goes on & we will all eventually create new family lives for our dc's wether that is on our own or with someone else. All your dreams have not been stolen you just have to make new ones. Take it slowly & you'll find yourself laughing again & getting on with life in the near future.

Hit lots of pot holes on my "bumpy road "today
Startin'
H seems to have had lightbulb moment about relationship and how he has treated me.
I just feel numbness TBH.
He was so sorry he had messed up .
I was just serene throughout conversation.Not shouty,gloaty,loving or hating just peaceful.
I told him the house was calm and peaceful and I didnt want him to move back in .
said he had good and bad days with the drink CLANG CLANG CLANG alarm bells alarm bells!
I asked him to go to counselling to find out why he was drinking and asked him to do AA. Told him about breaking negative patterns and good for dcs so you never know.
Still meant to be doing counselling but phoned and still 8 week waiting list.
I'm just not feeling" IT "anymore and I dont know if I ever will.
We were thick as thieves and the break of my trust is what hurts the most.
All such a waste x

Hi Maybees, just take it slowly & see what happens. If your H is being sincere & wants to put things right you will know this by watching his behaviour. You would also need to see a consistent change over a period of time to be able to trust him again.

Just try to stay out of your head & see what develops. Easier said than done I know. Exh & I used to be very close aswell so anytime he went through the whole begging forgiveness milarkey, my dreams of happy ever after were reignited. Unfortunately mine was never able to keep it up.

8 weeks will fly. Why not say to yourself that one way or another by 8 wks you will know if your H's lightbulb moment has lasted. Sending you hugs. When the hope gets reignited it can be very painful.

Jump Nyabinghy bob marley and the wailers
The Liquidator Harry J. Allstars

Great for skanking 'round the living room while carrying a toddler.

These are my AD's
I dont ,drink,smoke or do drugs ,
I do MUSIC !!

Realistically this was the happiest and most contented I have seen him and that is lovely to see 'round the kids.But I felt sad rather than hope IYSWIM and numb not reignited.Think I keep my boundaries,and keep doing what I'm doing.
If its meant to happen then he will make our home life better than it is just now
not worse and it is seriously good just now.Not in any rush whatsoever,amazing the difference a few weeks make in our lives.

ps farmer was spreading fields 2day so strong smell of cow poo 2nite!

Ah Maybees, glad to hear you're holding your boundaries! It's bad enough going through all that once never mind twice like I had to do (some of us are slow learners!!).

I know that smell well !

Just try to stay out of your head & see what develops

Does that mean detatchment rather than constant analysis and visualising renewing vows and afterparty (sorry have just fallen off chair laughing again}I do throw a good party x

ps just done a paste thing ,mental !
goin to bed with wet hair no packed lunches made etc .......

He has to be sober Startin'-that's it-end of !
I could never relax otherwise,only he can choose that but I'm not having dcs or me ever living with H drinking again .

Hi everyone

back again

DC is sleeping (eventually) next to me

DH is ?

I cant sleep again so here i am

Hi honey you have had a whirlwind weekend how ya doin did u eat yet ?

DC and i had some toast tonight and mug of warm milk. First thing i have had other than coffee

but made myself and him a promise that from tomorrow i will start and eat again

with my mum and dad aware of everything i have no doubt my mum will be cooking and baking like crazy and my dad ringing every take away in town!

Oh God, should be in bed was doing something else on computer & got distracted with time!

Maybees, glad you got a laugh anyway! Good luck with lunches & paste hair in the morning .

Moviegirl, hope you manage to get some sleep. Not easy in the early days I know!

The something else was loading up more of exh's items for sale .

Maybees, share what the paste hair was & maybe we could all do it in sync tomorrow night while listening to B Marley ...........

MG good on the toast and fab you told M&D great support for you.Total star x

Well done Startin have decided to try and straighten wet hair .They are called wet 2 straight but all a bit steamy if you ask me

no cut and paste I just did a cut and paste from your post .Never done it b4 everydays a schoolday.
laughing so much I am crying ....

the hills are alive.................

Ah Maybees, that is just gas. When you said you'd wet hair & that you done a paste I put the two things together & visualised you using some wonderful natural concoction on you're hair. I was dying to know what it was & was all set to copy same tonight . Really glad you figured the paste thing anyway {grin] & I'll just settle for my tub of deep conditioner !

Morning fellow Dumpings, hope you're all feeling a bit brighter this morning with the sun making an appearance.

maybees - that sounds really tough Numb is better than churned up though, perhaps?

DS has perked up this morning (was fine after I had managed to cool him down) and will still be able to go with H so long as he doesn't go downhill again. I've kept him out of nursery though as he wants cuddles (understandably)
We're having a cbeebies day (again)!

I seem to have gone numb about my H too at the moment. I feel like I want someone to help with the baby when it comes more than I want him back - which is clearly not a good place to be trying to get back together (conveniently as he's not interested either). We seem to be getting along fine though, with regards to DS, which is what is really important. He has even told me what he is going to feed DS for the week!