Are you 100% certain your dp/dh would never cheat on you?

[thesteelfairy2]

if you are why do you feel that way?

I am truly interested in the answers to this seeing as Mark Owen has joined the long line of celebrity cheating ar*eholes.

Also when I first met my ex h I would have bet a £million that he would never cheat on me. Even though it was in my face I trusted him implicitly because of all the things he said and his reactions to other peoples infidelities.

I personally am of the opinion that all men cheat given the opportunity, don't flame me though these are just my personal experiences of men. I have been in the army and worked mostly in male dominated environments so have extensive experience of random men and their relationship habits.

Well fuck you thecatatemyjumpsuit op asked an honest question and I gave an honest answer, not my fault you can't choose a decent man/woman whatever. What the hell makes you so superior? Are you psychic, an expert on men or something? No, not everyone is capable of cheating, just because that's what life has taught you doesn't make it true for everyone.

I've had boyfriends who cheat but it hasn't coloured my world to the extent it has yours. Maybe it's your low expectations of men that gives them nothing to live up to. I'm lucky enough to have found a man with good morals and integrity who loves me more than anything and if that comes across to you as smug than that's because you are feeling bitter my dear. Tough luck.

I agree with Thebreastmilksonme if you get with a man and he wont marry you before kids, doesnt help with the children, cheats etc or anything like that then its your fault as you picked that kind of man.

No. I know that sounds awful but I don't think you can ever know for sure.

I've been on the receiving end, ending an 8 year relationships. Now I'm with dp who is the most trustworthy person I've ever met, in every other way as well, ie not stupid with money, reliable, tolerant etc. Yet I'll never allow myself to be surprised again and I'll always make sure I don't rely on someone financially.

Perhaps it's more I know my ability to judge people isn't very good.

Soup Dragon said it.
The world is full of astonished women who thought their DH wouldn't cheat - I'd never say never! I happen to think that my DH is attractive - that's why I'm with him - if he is attractive to me so why would there not be other women who would be attracted to him?
The women on here who smugly assume their DH is devoted to them miss the point entirely - he may not do the chasing - probably won't - but if flattered by a woman who gets him at a low point so he has means (the OW), 'motive' (feeling unappreciated, pressure at work) etc and opportunity (easier if the wifey is complacent!) then it may well occur. I am not saying be suspicius, trusting is obviously fundamental in any mature loving relationship, just not in denial about it ever being a possibility.

Well my hubby couldn't stand people who cheated and hated watching films with affairs in. Went on and on about it for years, how disgraceful it was etc and then becomes good friends with a younger lady and over 4 years their friendship grew and then crossed the line. The affair lasted 8 months before I found out by accident. Never ever thought he'd do it to me ever! It was with a single girl.

However I also have a friend who'd been married years and years with teenage children, always looked like the perfect family, great couple and she found he'd been cheating for 2 years with a younger woman with a baby (not his).

I don't agree that people only cheat if marriage is in a bad place. If they are weak and the temptation comes along it may happen too.

lol at bibbity

interesting article in the obs last weekend on infidelity

Charming post from TheBreastMilksOnMe there.

That article says it all.

I definately do not trust dh 100% but nor do I trust myself 100%.

Good for you Thebreastmilksonme.

Just because some people don't know their partners well enough, doesn't give them the right to say that we can't know for sure.

I DO. Perhaps I am smug, and?

My dh knows and has always known that if he had so much as a drunken kiss with anyone else, that would be it, no ifs or buts, he would never see me again.

"I agree with Thebreastmilksonme if you get with a man and he wont marry you before kids, doesnt help with the children, cheats etc or anything like that then its your fault as you picked that kind of man."

That is an utterly foul and bitchy thing to say. I suggest you fck off back to smugsville with your judgemental bllocks.

And I include TheBreastmilksOnMe in my condemnation for her bitch-tastic " not my fault you can't choose a decent man/woman whatever"

Because, yes, of course people go out and choose someone they think will cheat on them. The whole fucking point is that you don't think they will until it happens. Twats.

All are capable of cheating. No one can say they are a 100% sure there partner would not cheat.

Well ok Breastmilk, I don't consider myself superior, or bitter, just realistic/honest.
Nobody thinks it will happen to them, do they?
Just listen to all the women posting on this thread saying exactly that - and then discovering that their partner had cheated.
I'm not actually talking about personal experience(if I were, I would admit that I have been unfaithful in relationships in my youth but so what?). And unlike you I have not been a victim of cheating (so hardly bitter); I just think it's foolish to proclaim that it could never, ever happen to you.
It happens! Shit happens. If it does happen it doesn't even have to be the end of the world.
Mrs GuyofGisbourne makes an excellent point, that if you/partner are attractive, chances are other people will find them so too. Maybe you're fugly? I don't know, just a theory...
You seem mega-defensive to be honest, and a little unhinged. Just my opinion (am no expert).

Well several posters are saying they are 100% sure their partner would not cheat on this thread which, frankly, just makes them look barking.

Oh sorry bibbity, did i make a spelling mistake? whoop's! but at least i can always count on some lovely person to put me right.

Eh?

I'm always really regarding people who are very black and white 'Oh my husband has strong values, he abhors infidelity, he would never cheat...' etc...

It reminds me of people who have strongly held, negative opinions about homosexuality because they are repressed in some way.

How can anybody be 100% sure about another individuals behaviour, or potential for behaviour? I'm not 100% sure about how I might behave in a given situation!!!

Well quite, Soupdragon. One would hardly choose a partner on the basis that they are going to cheat, would they?
Do I think my partner will cheat? No
Do I know that he won't? No.
Ergo not 100% sure.

I must be completely barking then Bibbity,

and I would be fumming with dh if he was on a thread like this and said he wasn't 100%

And whats the difference between 100% and 95%?
does that mean if it happens you will say oh well part of me always thought you might cheat any way so it dosen't hurt so much,

lowenergylightbulb My Mum said that Oh your father what never do that, high values blah blah, guess what, he did.

Oh I get you sunshines. Hadn't even noticed your wrong "there" there. I am not an internet pedant at all - I am the first to shout out at those Mumsnetters who make mean little jibes at typos and spelling mistakes, actually. One of my pet hates.

How utterly arrogant of people to suggest that those of us who are certain, are mentally unhinged / deluded / repressed, .

I'm none of the above , I just know my husband as well as I know myself, I should do, I've known him for over 30 years - with 25 years of faithful marriage.

To those who say well I can't possibly know what he thinks / get inside his head, would you like to bet on that?